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AliceDaRabbit — .:LOTP:. Chapter One :Rushed Affairs:
Published: 2019-10-14 03:42:02 +0000 UTC; Views: 266; Favourites: 5; Downloads: 0
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Ayyye! So here is the first chapter to the prologue of Lethal Gold. I did this in 2016 during NaNoWriMo, however, I've been heavily editing it and proof reading. And Proof reading... and more proof reading.... (Posting it I had to add a few more edits LOL! ) you get the point Haha! So I am finally ready to show off this thing. I hope you guys like it! And no pressure to read it, I know reading can be a pain sometimes. I hope to have Lethal Gold ( the comic) ready soon, but it's been a lot of work. I hope for now everyone enjoys this!
Now on to what I have to say about this chapter... (Read Chapter One first to avoid Spoilers!)
Oh boy. This chapter hits hard and heavy. It's an intense start to this backstory! I wasn't sure if I should move this chapter to be a flash back, but honestly I like it being a chaotic start to my prologue. I did edit this chapter A LOT. It was only 4 pages before, but now it's 10. Yes the images, help but I added a lot more to Deam's part. Before he flew away and you just assumed he was dead. I didn't like that ending for Deam though because I really like him as a character. Also I added a lot more lore on Plague Beasts themselves, just kinda tucked away in little bits. I wanted to add more about Mara's Village, but I didn't want this chapter to be an information overload. To be honest as well, plague beasts don't show up as much as you may think, so this chapter was a lot of fun to do. I like getting to draw them, and fight with them. Anyway I hope you like this! I really would love to hear what you guys think!
Also yes. The Image of Acorn and her mom at the end there? It rips my heart out too.
*~~When Critiquing!~~*
If you're going to Critique, I ask very nicely for constructive criticism!
Grammar, spelling, Anything like that is helpful when you point it out! I sometimes miss these things! So thank you!
Writing is NOT my strong point. If anything does not make sense, let me know! I can explain and maybe edit the story if something is confusing. I am after all, a comic artist. I am more used to drawing details not explaining them.
Personal Critiques about this chapter:
I wasn't sure what information to add or leave out. I feel I have a good balance here! Other then that I am not sure what else to say about this chapter.
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Comments: 4
Alright! I'm back, more calm and I took the time to read the first chapter and omg so many action and drama! I'm already hooked, you are doing a good job ♥♥
I also knew that Acorn seemed...familiar to me when I read her little snippets. It's Super Mom Shaila ! ♥ It was a nice surprise!
But poor her, she's now parentless ;.;
I saw that you posted other chapters, I'll read them between two pauses, I'm hooked now XD
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Wow, that was an action-packed start to the story, for sure! But that's perfectly alright because the action was very well written, it felt very real. And of course the drawings are awesome 
I notice the plague beasts are different colours. Does it have a meaning? Not in the sense of 'does it feature in the story in a meaningful way', but generally do the different colours mean they have different skills or something like that?
Alsooo, have I been hopelessly stupid or was it a surprise to others, too, that the girl is Shaila?? Because you may well have said it and I've just forgotten, or I haven't put two and two together, but the name reveal there was a genuine "OMG" moment for me. xDDD Anyway, I'm sorry if I've just been really dense xD
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Thank you so so much! I am glad you think it was full of action like I was tying to do!
The colours of plague beasts are simply so it's less boring to draw them. xD They are all black / dark colours. So I added some lighter tones to give them some more pop so to speak. Their eyes and Horns on the other hand are more important! Horns are ALWAYS unique, and eye types are based on "ranks" So Deam killed a Commander with four eyes. (There is only one with Six eyes and that is Prince the lord of the plague beasts!) Basically the 4 eyes are the ones Prince made first, so they are just stronger. While two eyes are weaker because Prince didn't put as much effort into them.
AAH! I'm glad I got you, yes that was the point! I did want an "OMG" moment so I am happy 
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