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Published: 2007-06-14 06:21:48 +0000 UTC; Views: 262; Favourites: 4; Downloads: 1
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Description
There was a buzzing. A loud noise which was annoying and startlingmore than anything else. I rolled over to look at the clock. Six o'clock
and four seconds. Nothing out of the ordinary; like every other day for
the past two years I had gotten up at the same time on every weekday.
I began my routine by using the toilet and the splashing water on my face
to help my eyes awaken. There, standing in front of the mirror I realized
how different things were now from the way they were then. Thinking back
to college and friends was a trip down memory lane that I should not take;
upon doing so the world would plunder into a dizzying and even more droll
process then it has already become. Now beginning in the kitchen eating my
toast with an pre-evening cooked egg on top, a must for every morning along
with coffee mixed with a little cocoa for extra flavor, which to this day made me
feel a little younger inside.
Now with my suit on, I began out the door
walking to the bus stop to wait approximately six minutes and fifty
seconds. As I stood there with my briefcase I barely noticed how light
the traffic had gotten and how uncrowded the streets were. I still stood,
facing forward, as if the world had simply stopped existing and the space
between myself and the fence across the street were the only things left.
And so I would stare at the only thing across form me. I barely noticed
the low rumbling that was occurring, as I could feel it moving from one
area away from me to another.
Out the corner of my eye an extremely large blur moved over the closest
part of the horizon. Through houses and buildings it seemed to move. But
all this was through my peripheral vision, as I stood at the bus stop
looking at the only other object of existence. I dare not move, I dare not
look, but all I can do is barely notice. In my doldrums that seem to have
a span of the last two years.
The blur was now coming down the street and I right in it's path. But it
is impossible for me to look or even consider looking at it.
At least not yet.
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Comments: 17
Kensou13 [2007-12-08 03:45:12 +0000 UTC]
I really like it, at least the parts I unsderstood. And those which didn't, well....
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alteregoAtlas In reply to Kensou13 [2007-12-09 03:12:18 +0000 UTC]
oh thank ya XD
yus ..... its a little confusing I admit ... wish I could have explained a little better.... tell me what part(s) u didnt get and I'll do my best to fill you in
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Kensou13 In reply to alteregoAtlas [2007-12-13 14:05:30 +0000 UTC]
The last 2 paragraphs are the ones I don't understand very well.
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alteregoAtlas In reply to Kensou13 [2007-12-13 23:19:30 +0000 UTC]
he pretty much gets his business suit, walks out the door and to a usual spot to wait for the bus. As he is waiting for the bus he starts to stair at a fence across the street and doesn't notice the mysterious entity moving around him. Or something to that effect ... hope that helps
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Kensou13 In reply to alteregoAtlas [2007-12-14 00:01:55 +0000 UTC]
That's what called my attention the most, what's this entity that he is so affraid of. He's affraid right? 'Cause he doesn't dare to watch
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alteregoAtlas In reply to Kensou13 [2007-12-14 00:48:35 +0000 UTC]
Nah he doesn't even notice the entity he is so caught up with how mundane his life is.
And you'll have to wait to find out what the entity is in the second chapter
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SacredSouls22 [2007-12-03 21:30:38 +0000 UTC]
Hey, I like it.
Although, I won't lie....I don't completely understand it.
But that's just me! x]
I still wanna read more. ^^
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
alteregoAtlas In reply to SacredSouls22 [2007-12-04 00:00:08 +0000 UTC]
I must admit its a little complicated in some areas... Maybe if you point out a few parts I can try to explain
Glad you enjoyed it
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SacredSouls22 In reply to alteregoAtlas [2007-12-04 00:30:45 +0000 UTC]
Hmm....well, there's this guy do what he does everyday, not noticing some unusual changes.
Then he slightly notices a 'blur' coming toward him...
Eh heh heh....is that right? ^-^;;
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alteregoAtlas In reply to SacredSouls22 [2007-12-04 23:45:19 +0000 UTC]
sounds like you got the idea then
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minibubble [2007-12-03 20:55:16 +0000 UTC]
VERY GOOD! I like this! Though now I'm curious?...Will there be more? Please say yes!
All right just a few tiny mistakes...
It's 'collEge' (I assume you mean third level education? You spelt out 'collAge' meaning the pic you make with lots of little images)
'World had simply stopPED existing' not 'World had simply stop existing'(unless i'm wrong )
'eripheral vision' will do, not '
eripheral vision VISION'
Sorry was that too much?
ANYWAYS! I really do like this! Please write more!
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alteregoAtlas In reply to minibubble [2007-12-03 23:57:10 +0000 UTC]
thank you very much I don't write too much too often
I know I'm ho-o-o-rible with grammatical errors and spelling I'll go fix 'em.
Thank ya. I may need your literature skills in the future
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minibubble In reply to alteregoAtlas [2007-12-04 21:22:19 +0000 UTC]
Don't worries abouts it! It was really good! You'll be even more fantastic over time! Can't wait!
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