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Published: 2011-12-09 02:28:55 +0000 UTC; Views: 497; Favourites: 0; Downloads: 0
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The sun was bright, lighting the clear blue sky with an intensity unseasonable in winter, and it shone happily down on Twilight Sparkle and Applejack. They were to pay a visit to Fluttershy's cottage at the yellow mare's request; she had several dozen extremely ill hedgehogs to deal with and could not leave their side, even to get the research books she needed to combat their sickness. Twilight had offered to teleport her and Applejack straight there with the books but she was talked out of it; Applejack said that the bookworm looked as though she was about to fall asleep and cut her off, saying that she'd bring a cart round for the books. Besides, she opined, the walk would do her good.Twilight had rocked back on her hooves slightly, feeling the blast of pain from them, and giggled to herself. She was pressed, and her lie was not found wanting by the farm pony, which was good; she'd had a very long time to prepare and had consulted a lot of books on psychology and cold reading to do so. That had been a bad night, according to the after-action report from her medical spells and from an exhausted, red-eyed Spike, and she'd vowed to make sure that the pain had been worth it.
She was challenged on the matter this morning when Applejack accused her of drifting off.
"Huh, wha? Sorry, Applejack. I was just, um... I was miles away." Twilight immediately cursed herself. The books had said that a lot depended on intonation and she'd let a little wobble of pain through. Applejack looked singularly unimpressed.
"Mah eye you wuz. Twilight Sparkle, Ah doan' appreciate bein' lied to, especially by one o' mah friends. Y'all were swayin' as yer walked an' ya didn't stop when Ah trod on yer hoof. Somethin' ain't right, missy, an' yer gonna tell me wh- HEY!" It was too late; the flash from the teleport had already begun to fade. "S-stupid gosh-darn Element of Magic... oh well, bes' be, be up an' doin'. Twilight'll sort hersel' out... Ah hope... Aw, horsefeathers, Ah'm gonna hafta tell the girls about this." She hitched up the cart on her back legs and set off again.
*******
"SPIIIIIKE!"
The aforementioned dragon nearly choked on an emerald and slid off of his chair, landing on the floor with an almighty crash. He picked himself up and scurried into the room. "Twilight, what's wrong?"
The mare had landed awkwardly after the teleport - an ankle, according to Spike's untrained but increasingly experienced eye, looked like it had twisted again - but that wasn't the source of Twilight's tears. She was sobbing again, for the second time in as many hours. As bad as it was now, he had a feeling that tonight would be worse.
"It's... i-i-it's Apple-*snff* Applejack. She's... she..." Once again, Twilight couldn't finish the sentence, her mind just crumbling into the flood and trailing down her face. Even the presence of a thin arm at her neck could not reassure her, nor the constant murmurs of support that blurred into one incoherent mass after a while. There was nothing to do but wait it out.
Just like they'd always done.
*******
"Who is it- oh, hey Applejack!" Rainbow Dash's disposition was perky but tired-looking; Fluttershy had apparently been having her fly to Zecora's hut and back for potion ingredients again. "I thought Twilight'd be with you. Trouble keeping up?"
"Uh... not exactly. Rainbow, can Ah come inside? Ah've still got all tha books fer-"
"Of course. Fluttershy's in the living room... boy, I need a nap. Fluttershy," the rainbow mare called, "AJ's here with the books you want- WHOA!"
A pink and yellow blur like a comet made of Battenburg cake snapped off the harnesses of the cart and dragged it into the living room, which had a crudely-made sign on it saying "Isolay Isolashu Sick Bay."
Applejack looked at Rainbow Dash.
Rainbow Dash looked at Applejack.
This went on for just enough time for things to get really awkward.
"She's a little... intense right now," mumbled Rainbow Dash, breaking the silence much more quietly than was her usual wont. Applejack nodded, still rendered speechless from the speed Fluttershy had moved at. Her flank had a friction burn on it. "Whaddaya say we go into the kitchen and I'll fix us up a snack. Egg and cress sandwich okay?"
"Uh... sure. Sorry, Rainbow, it's jes' a shock ter see 'er like that. Firs' Twilight hidin', uh..." Applejack looked around warily. "Hidin' stuff, an' now Fluttershy's movin like you do and busy as a beehive... it's kinda creepy." The farmpony trotted into the kitchen, wherein her friend was unwrapping some egg and cress sandwiches from the tiny shop on the high street. She raised an eyebrow.
"What?" Asked Rainbow Dash. "You know how bad of a cook I am, I'm not going to put Fluttershy through it too. She's too delicate, so I've been letting her live the Rainbow Dash Diet."
Applejack's eyebrow twitched higher. "Takeout pizza, sandwiches courtesy of one Off License, a whole mess o' cans of... wait, you gave Fluttershy this?" She grabbed a large blue and silver can with a large red bull on it. "Have y'all actually got a brain in that thar head o' yours?"
"It's not my fault! I like the taste, she found it, it's sugar-free so I thought it'd be alright! I didn't expect her to burn through my stash overnight!" Rainbow's voice was a keening wail now, and Applejack covered her friend with a forearm.
"Hey now, sugarcube, it's alright. Ah ain't mad, Ah know how hard it is when somepony's workin' 'emselves to the bone an' they doan' see it." She shuddered at the memory of last applebuck season. Rainbow Dash smiled.
"It's hard, that's all. I'm not used to Fluttershy in full-on doctor mode."
"Ah reckon as we'll all feel a mite better with some o' them dandy-lookin' sandwiches. We're gonna need our strength, Ah reckon." Applejack's mood darkened slightly as she sat at Fluttershy's table.
"How do you mean?" Rainbow returned with the plated sandwiches and a large bottle of dangerously-green drink, which Applejack sensibly declined. "Is this that thing about Twilight?"
"Well, not ter sound like a gossip, but yeah. Ain'tcha noticed how distant she's been gettin' ever since that scuffle we had with Discord? How she don't ever talk about herself?"
"That's gotta be a good thing, right? I mean, after that whole Mare Do Well-" Rainbow Dash's confused tone was cut off almost instantly.
"Not like this. You ask her how she is, you press her, you get nothin'. An' Ah reckon she's..." Applejack padded across the kitchen and eased shut the door, then dropped her voice to a whisper. "She's on somethin'."
"On something? Twilight? Please. She's too big of an egghead to be a Trank addict on the side, AJ, you're imagining it-"
"Am Ah, Rainbow Dash? Jes' this morning, Ah turns up at her house at ten thirty, she's only jes' got up."
"Uh, I do that. Like, all the time. And I'm not on Trank."
"Well, that's true, ah guess. Anyway, though, we were takin' the books up here when Ah trod on 'er hoof by accident. No sale. She jes' kept walkin', swayin' a li'l bit an' keepin' 'er steps light. So Ah does it agin. Not a darned thing. An'... gosh, Ah ain't proud ta say this... Ah bucked 'er solid, right in the gut. She wheezes a little an' coughs up... somethin' weird-lookin'... but she don't even say a word about it ta me. That ain't right, Rainbow. That ain't right at all." There had been a little hairline fracture running through the orange pony's voice throughout proceedings, and now it was beginning to widen. "An', an' when Ah finally got 'er to wake up, she tries ter tell me she was jes' daydreamin', an' that's a lie, Rainbow, she's lyin' to her friend, an' Ah says so an' Ah says what Ah thinks of it an' she jes' up an' teleports outta there like Ah'm Discord come back, an'... a-an' that hurt, right here. Ah'm worried sick an' Ah don' know what ta do."
After a few minutes, a deathly pale Rainbow let the plate slide out of her hooves and shatter on the polished floor.
*******
"Here, Twilight, drink this. Are you sure you didn't fall down? You look like you went five rounds with Ditzy Doo when the winner gets the keys to the muffin shop..." Spike was checking the pony over, his claws delicately tracing the outlines of some new bruises and tentatively checking for bone fragments. He had in his free hand a sippy cup full of Zecora's strongest painkiller potions, which he was proffering to the prone pony.
"don't wanna." Twilight's voice was almost inaudible, her throat worn out from an hour of tears.
"Please, Twilight... I made it. There's nothing that'll hurt you in here, I promise. You trust me, right? I'm your number one assistant..."
"... don't wanna. hurts."
"No, no, Twilight, look. It's painkillers. See?" Spike took a sip, despite his better judgement. "It's safe. I'm not hurt."
"promise?"
"I promise." Spike offered the cup again and Twilight took it, her magic still shaky as it brought the cup to her lips. Eventually, she forced the potion down - it tasted weirdly of grapes - and she got to her hooves.
"... okay... that, that's better. thank you spike." Practically every word was punctuated with a little rasping sniff. Twilight teleported up the stairs and settled down in the ancient corduroy-covered armchair she kept in her private study. Her dragon followed her and sat on the chair's arm, stroking her mane while she read quietly. Just like the old days, thought Spike. They were comfortable, and they sat there in each other's company just reading and being together.
Finally, Twilight broke the silence. "I... I think Applejack knows, Spike. Or at least suspects."
"Um... wow. That'd explain the new bruising on the ribs. What, um, what did she say?"
"She called me a liar when I gave the standard excuse... I don't know how I ever thought I'd convince her it was nothing. She said she trod on my hoof and I did nothing."
"That's probably a side effect of the-" Spike stopped himself and fished around in his mind for an adequate lie. "The pain you're in. C'mon, let's get some lunch. Or possibly dinner, seeing as how it's getting dark."
"Yes, Spike. I think... I think I can survive cooking." Twilight walked out of the door and-
WHAM
Spike sprinted after her, yelling her name. When he got to the landing, he paled in shock.
Applejack had Twilight pinned to the wall, the purple unicorn wheezing like a broken bellows. Beside her, Fluttershy was hovering with a stony expression and a slim torch, checking to see how Twilight's eyes moved. Spike turned and saw Rainbow Dash and Rarity looking on with utter disapproval. Pinkie Pie was nowhere to be seen.
"Would somepony tell me what the HAY this is?" The dragon erupted, rounding on Rainbow Dash and rolling up some non-existent sleeves. She sighed and brushed one hoof through her mane.
"Listen, Spike... Applejack told me what happened. I've seen this before, back at Junior Speedster's camp; one of my- one of the older teachers was an addict too."
"Addict? What do you mean, addict? Twilight's not on drugs, I'm her assistant, she wouldn't keep something like that from me!"
"I'm sorry, Spike. I'm really, really sorry. But we have to intervene. Painkiller addiction... it can destroy somepony. I saw it happen, and I won't let one of my friends go down that road."
Spike reeled backwards, color fading even further. "No. No no no no no, you guys have this wrong. This is my fault... this is all my fault..."
Rarity trotted over and put a hoof around his shoulders. "It's not, Spike. My... our friend did this of her own volition-"
"Except she didn't, because the first painkiller I've taken in years I took was today! Check the sippy cup on the sink." Twilight had recovered from the initial shock long enough to say her piece. "Tell her, Spike, tell them they're wrong-"
"STOP! LYIN'!"
The only sound for the next few moments was the echoes of Applejack slamming Twilight against the wall again. Then Applejack spoke, her eyes teary and voice crackling like an old radio.
"Ah hate this, Twilight. Don't y'all see? Ah don' wanna make ya sad, but yer, yer lyin' to me. Ah..." She sniffed, and collected herself. "Yer sick, Twilight. Yer on this stuff, alla those potions, an'... an'... an' we wan' our Twi back. Ah want mah friend back. So... look, Fluttershy, hurry it up already, will ya? This is hard."
Spike finally came round to the situation and leapt out of Rarity's hooves. If he could just get to the syringe she'd produced from a bag on the floor, maybe he could-
There was a rush of air and whiteness, which faded into dark.
*******
Fluttershy administered the sedative and watched her friend fall bonelessly against Applejack. As she blurred out of the door to get back to the hedgehogs, Rarity trotted up to the orange pony's side. "You didn't have to knock him out, Applejack" she said reproachfully.
"No... no Ah didn't. Come on, Nurse Tenderheart ain't gonna wait much longer." With that, the farm pony lugged the unconscious librarian down the stairs and onto the waiting pegasus ambulance. They clambered on board, saying subdued hellos to the slim, pretty nurse, and they were off.
"Hey, what gives? This isn't the way to Ponyville Gen!" Rainbow Dash had noticed that they were flying entirely the wrong way; instead of heading north, they were going west, towards Trottingham's Chalk Downs. She rounded on Tenderheart. "Where are you talking her?"
"Please, Miss Dash, calm down. Ponyville doesn't have the pastoral care requirements for someone with Miss Sparkle's... needs. We're taking her - and all of you - to a state-of-the-art center for just such ponies. It's only been open for two years; Princess Luna cut the ribbon herself. It won't take more than an hour, but it might be uncomfortable to stand still for that long. You might care to sit back down." The effect of her voice, which sounded like Fluttershy if she'd ever grown a spine, was profound. Rainbow Dash had gone pale again and slumped down next to Rarity. Applejack was on the unicorn's other shoulder, eyes invisible behind her mane and hat held before her in her hooves.
The hour passed, and the ambulance touched down. The sun was setting, but despite that the gardens seemed full of life and beauty. A little brook babbled gently underneath a handsome wrought-iron bridge. Flowers that glowed like phantasms coiled themselves around great trees, and the three conscious Elements felt more at peace, and up ahead they could see the hospital, a great stately home in the style of noted 18th-century architects Regent and Bath Stone. It seemed like Tenderheart had picked a good one.
Rarity leaned in towards Tenderheart. "Listen, I'm wealthy, very wealthy, and Twilight Sparkle is a personal friend. Send the bills to my-"
"That won't be necessary, Miss... Rarity, yes?" Rarity nodded and opened her mouth to protest, but Tenderheart cut her off. "Trottingham operates a free healthcare system paid for by taxes. It's enlightened; they don't leave anypony behind simply because they don't have insurance. It's been extremely successful so far. Ah, Doctor. I'm sorry to have dragged you out like this. This is the one I wrote to you about via dragonfire, Twilight Spar - oh..."
The Ponyville mares had stopped dead. This doctor was beautiful, her mane still perfectly ramrod-straight gold and her coat the very brightest silver. Even her cutie mark, a pale pink outline of an ouroboros with blue lightning bolts emanating from the centre of it, seemed to compliment her. Applejack's jaw hung open. Rarity's eyes widened. Dash's wings didn't pop open, but only by dint of considerable effort on her part.
"Dreadfully sorry about that, Tenderheart, happens all the time. My name's Shining Light, I'm the deputy treatment manager here at Moon River Hospice. I take it our latest arrival is on your back, Miss..."
"Uh, Applejack. Jes' that, Ah'm," she gulped, which caused a little giggle of nervousness to escape from her lips afterwards, "Ah'm afraid Ah ain't no great beauty - Ah mean, Ah, um... Ah ain't got a lot o' fancy titles, but Ah looks out fer mah friends. Please... help her."
Shining Light smiled. "I'll do my very best, Applejack. Depend upon it. Now, I think I should take Twilight Sparkle to her room. It wouldn't do to keep her out here much longer, after all, there's a cold night scheduled again. Associates!" She clapped her hooves and five burly-looking orderly stallions trotted into view, their muscles working languidly beneath their tight white uniforms in a manner that made Rarity feel the need to have a very long lie down with a cheap romantic potboiler. "Take Ms. Sparkle to her apartment. She's obviously had a very difficult day... as have her friends. May I press you to supper here?"
"I'm afraid we need to get back to Ponyville. See you soon, Shining Light!"
"Indeed. Farewell." Shining Light waved goodbye, smiling brightly. Once they'd disappeared out of sight, the wards around the doors flared and jabbed the minds of all the Elements present. Once they arrived home, they'd never remember having been here... or the pony they'd dropped off. With a smile, she cantered back into the hospital and dragged her boss down to Processing.
"Twilight Sparkle," said the doctor in question as her orderlies began busily locking her in a straitjacket, "I told you before. Nopony pulls one over on Aklespia Caducea."
Related content
Comments: 76
colourcodedchaos In reply to ??? [2012-02-08 08:56:48 +0000 UTC]
Not a problem. A more edited (and probably better) version is available on FiMFiction, complete with more chapters than this has. Currently working on chapter 5, too.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
invisiblehand In reply to colourcodedchaos [2012-02-10 02:06:34 +0000 UTC]
Better? How can it get better!?
-squeels-
Ahhh you are just too good to be true!
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
colourcodedchaos In reply to invisiblehand [2012-02-10 03:28:04 +0000 UTC]
By more judicious editing and making the overarching story flow a lot better. Simply put, it's a grimdark story in the early chapters but by the end, it's really very hopeful. At least, so I have it planned to be. This series is part of an overarching continuity called the Westmareland Cycle, in which each member of the mane 6 gets a power boost before a big, climactic battle between a cockton of previous antagonists and featuring a lot of previously mentioned heroes, including The Witch of the Westmareland herself and the New Gallifrey Initiative, who will be touched upon later in The L Words and across the rest of the series. If you're at all familiar with a certain brown earth pony stallion's fanon and mythos, you can spot where that arc's going, but I'm also including a bunch of new villains and a lot of apocalyptic theory from the Book of Revelations and other hellfire religions. To put it into terms Rainbow Dash would understand, I want it to be pure awesome, but with a real plot behind it. I want the finale to be a cross-breed of Tengen Toppa Gurren Lagann, Neon Genesis Evangelion and The Lord Of The Rings in terms of scale, pathos and balls-to-the-wall action panache. Whether I'll succeed is another matter entirely, but it's always worth a go, eh?
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
invisiblehand In reply to colourcodedchaos [2012-02-16 00:21:01 +0000 UTC]
...that is one of the best things I've ever read.
you rock.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
colourcodedchaos In reply to invisiblehand [2012-02-16 01:13:40 +0000 UTC]
*bluuuuuuuuuuuuuuuush*
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
invisiblehand In reply to colourcodedchaos [2012-02-18 00:31:44 +0000 UTC]
No seriously, that's awesome.
YOU are awesome.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
colourcodedchaos In reply to invisiblehand [2012-02-19 23:36:33 +0000 UTC]
*lushes even harder, which is no mean feat*
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
invisiblehand In reply to colourcodedchaos [2012-02-20 15:23:59 +0000 UTC]
Colorcodedchaos confirmed for way to fucking modest
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
colourcodedchaos In reply to invisiblehand [2012-02-21 03:03:41 +0000 UTC]
Nope, just good old-fashioned ridiculously low self-esteem.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
invisiblehand In reply to colourcodedchaos [2012-02-21 05:11:48 +0000 UTC]
Undeservedly low!
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
colourcodedchaos In reply to invisiblehand [2012-02-21 17:15:34 +0000 UTC]
Perhaps. Parents say otherwise. Constantly.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
invisiblehand In reply to colourcodedchaos [2012-02-21 19:56:56 +0000 UTC]
Philistines!
You rock, and never let anyone tell you otherwhise!
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
colourcodedchaos In reply to invisiblehand [2012-02-21 21:39:43 +0000 UTC]
I am blushing so hard right now
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
invisiblehand In reply to colourcodedchaos [2012-02-22 04:24:11 +0000 UTC]
Silly colour, you should be used to all this praise by now!
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
colourcodedchaos In reply to invisiblehand [2012-02-22 06:25:56 +0000 UTC]
If writing the next chapter of The L Words has taught me anything, it's that there's a world of difference between what I should be doing and what I find myself physically able to do...
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
invisiblehand In reply to colourcodedchaos [2012-02-23 00:00:23 +0000 UTC]
And that's why you're so good!
You're humble!
Huh, maybe that's why you don't like Trixie?
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
colourcodedchaos In reply to invisiblehand [2012-02-23 13:02:15 +0000 UTC]
Perhaps... but then, it doesn't explain why I like RD so much... maybe I just like the thought of a tiny rainbow pegasus having fun and being happy. It's just nice, you know? Just... nice.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
invisiblehand In reply to colourcodedchaos [2012-02-23 17:43:06 +0000 UTC]
As Fluttershy would say
"Its nice"
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
colourcodedchaos In reply to invisiblehand [2012-02-23 20:59:24 +0000 UTC]
Nah, not really. The Flutternice comes out when she can't think of any other complement to give, whereas this nice came out because I don't have the right vocabulary to explain how it makes me feel seeing Rainbow Dash be all happy and smiley and doing what she loves.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
invisiblehand In reply to colourcodedchaos [2012-02-23 22:46:04 +0000 UTC]
Ah, thank you for correcting me on that.
I had quite forgotten.
Yes, even I must admit that Dash is incredibly adorable sometimes.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
invisiblehand In reply to colourcodedchaos [2012-02-24 01:00:38 +0000 UTC]
*mutters* Twilight is still best poni
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
colourcodedchaos In reply to invisiblehand [2012-02-24 05:11:48 +0000 UTC]
I quite agree! That's why I'm torturing her... wait...
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
invisiblehand In reply to colourcodedchaos [2012-02-24 05:35:13 +0000 UTC]
*le gasp!
Unhan- er, hoof her you fiend!
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
colourcodedchaos In reply to invisiblehand [2012-02-24 10:28:59 +0000 UTC]
Dude, have you not read the other parts of The L Words yet?
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
invisiblehand In reply to colourcodedchaos [2012-02-24 15:38:46 +0000 UTC]
I'm working my way through them, slowly but surely.
I'm also making my way through Fallout Equestria and Project Horizons, so I apologize if I am a bit delayed in my reading.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
colourcodedchaos In reply to invisiblehand [2012-02-24 22:03:09 +0000 UTC]
Nah, it's fine. I'd also recommend Eternal and It's A Dangerous Business, Going Out Your Door. Both wonderful fics, the latter one that inspired me to make this thing a big continuity in the first place.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
invisiblehand In reply to colourcodedchaos [2012-02-24 22:07:01 +0000 UTC]
Oh! Okay!
Aaaaaaaah, so much to read!
-flails-
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
colourcodedchaos In reply to invisiblehand [2012-02-24 23:19:04 +0000 UTC]
Don't worry! You'll have time to read everything soon!
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
invisiblehand In reply to colourcodedchaos [2012-02-24 23:44:43 +0000 UTC]
I should hope so!
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
invisiblehand In reply to colourcodedchaos [2012-02-25 02:40:09 +0000 UTC]
I'm also reading Machiavelli's The Prince!
Man but I am spoiled!
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
colourcodedchaos In reply to invisiblehand [2012-02-25 02:59:39 +0000 UTC]
Indeed you are...
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
invisiblehand In reply to colourcodedchaos [2012-02-25 03:04:07 +0000 UTC]
Eeeeee!
This is a good week!
'Cept for the whole turning-into-spring thing
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
colourcodedchaos In reply to invisiblehand [2012-02-25 12:13:20 +0000 UTC]
Quite so. Over here, though, all it means is the clouds are a slightly lighter grey.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
invisiblehand In reply to colourcodedchaos [2012-02-25 18:45:03 +0000 UTC]
I standslightly corrected due to the tornado outside.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
colourcodedchaos In reply to invisiblehand [2012-02-25 21:04:04 +0000 UTC]
Quite. I do hope you're alright, though...
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
invisiblehand In reply to colourcodedchaos [2012-02-25 21:10:41 +0000 UTC]
Bah no need to worry, the dorm provides proficient shelter.
S'not like the last time where I was trapped half naked in a wooden spiral staircase.
That one kinda sucked
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
colourcodedchaos In reply to invisiblehand [2012-02-26 01:29:34 +0000 UTC]
Also one of the few times when that's acceptable. When you're with another person, it rarely is...
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
invisiblehand In reply to colourcodedchaos [2012-02-26 02:04:15 +0000 UTC]
A life lesson I have yet tobe forced to learn.
I did however just learn another.
"Do not chew on knives, lest they close on and cut your upper lip"
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
colourcodedchaos In reply to invisiblehand [2012-02-26 02:14:43 +0000 UTC]
"I thought you swung from ropes with a cutlass between your teeth."
"We had a man who did that. He had a nickname."
"Oh yeah?"
"Yeah. Topless Larry." -- Jingo, Terry Pratchett.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
invisiblehand In reply to colourcodedchaos [2012-02-26 02:19:09 +0000 UTC]
Oh you bitch! that made me laugh and now there's blood on my bed!
👍: 0 ⏩: 2
colourcodedchaos In reply to invisiblehand [2012-02-26 02:53:35 +0000 UTC]
Hehehe... this is why you only put certain things in your mouth. Like cake!
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
colourcodedchaos In reply to invisiblehand [2012-02-26 03:01:06 +0000 UTC]
Indeed, and verily 'tis so.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
colourcodedchaos In reply to invisiblehand [2012-02-26 03:19:54 +0000 UTC]
Quite so. *spis cup of tea, which is also good*
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
invisiblehand In reply to colourcodedchaos [2012-02-26 03:29:52 +0000 UTC]
I jelly that you has coffee.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
colourcodedchaos In reply to invisiblehand [2012-02-26 04:15:03 +0000 UTC]
Nope, tea. It's like coffee, but better in every conceivable way. Caffeine content can be made up for with the pills.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
invisiblehand In reply to colourcodedchaos [2012-02-26 04:17:07 +0000 UTC]
Bleh, never like tea myself.
I tend to live off a mix of coffee, soda, and salad.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
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