CreateNoReflection In reply to Melanophrionsa [2009-06-11 02:52:07 +0000 UTC]

Scary...in a good way, I should hope! Or maybe in a bad way, tends to the mystery...I'm very curious now, I want to see this person ^^

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Melanophrionsa In reply to CreateNoReflection [2009-06-12 20:27:44 +0000 UTC]

(laughs quietly) That's not quite possible unfortunately, but you really do look like she did when she was your age...

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CreateNoReflection In reply to Melanophrionsa [2009-06-14 01:52:56 +0000 UTC]

(smiles) Very good, anyway. I'm glad to know I remind you so well of her. ^^

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Melanophrionsa In reply to CreateNoReflection [2009-06-14 18:13:47 +0000 UTC]

(laughs quietly) Strange thing to be glad about, but fair enough

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CreateNoReflection In reply to Melanophrionsa [2009-06-15 04:46:25 +0000 UTC]

I suppose it might be ^^ but I am an odd one all around, so it is usually to be expected.
<3

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Melanophrionsa In reply to CreateNoReflection [2009-06-20 12:28:57 +0000 UTC]

Fair enough then! (laughs quietly) As the person you resemble once said, the odd ones are the best.

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CreateNoReflection In reply to Melanophrionsa [2009-06-21 03:16:09 +0000 UTC]

I like this person I resemble! ^^ May I ask her name? Purely curiosity. xD

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Melanophrionsa In reply to CreateNoReflection [2009-06-22 13:35:59 +0000 UTC]

I would give it to you but it wouldn't be fair to her-Plus fate dictates that she'd find and kill me despite the fact that we haven't spoken in years. She's like that (laughs quietly).

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CreateNoReflection In reply to Melanophrionsa [2009-06-22 21:30:59 +0000 UTC]

Makes sense. I know a few people like that

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Melanophrionsa In reply to CreateNoReflection [2009-08-04 23:07:50 +0000 UTC]

Yeah, some people do get that way unfortunately...How are you by the by?

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CreateNoReflection In reply to Melanophrionsa [2009-08-04 23:31:14 +0000 UTC]

*smiles* I am well, thank you! And yourself??

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Melanophrionsa In reply to CreateNoReflection [2009-08-05 00:18:06 +0000 UTC]

I am well also, I think- a little dazed and sleepless but otherwise fine...A lot of strange dreams which I can't help but upload to DA...Something must be plaguing my subconscious, and it's unusual for me not to pick up on it myself.

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CreateNoReflection In reply to Melanophrionsa [2009-08-05 16:02:48 +0000 UTC]

Good!
Yikes, you're having them too? I've been having strange dreams myself, I can't even figure out where they're coming from!
Is something particularly exciting or difficult going on in your life right now?

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Melanophrionsa In reply to CreateNoReflection [2009-08-05 21:04:08 +0000 UTC]

I'm about to start university- I suppose that's kind of exciting/difficult...But then again I'm not sure how my subconscious associates murdering a stranger with university.

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CreateNoReflection In reply to Melanophrionsa [2009-08-07 01:03:33 +0000 UTC]

Ah. Who knows where strange dreams come from? Supposedly they're the subconscious dealing with the stuff you're dwelling on or stressful things. I dunno, just an idea XD
Well, university sounds wonderful, I'm excited for you!

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Melanophrionsa In reply to CreateNoReflection [2009-08-07 01:06:58 +0000 UTC]

Thanks! I'm pretty excited too to be honest- I'll finally be getting away from Essex and striding completely alone- So many new things to learn, too...And without learning I'd probably be bored senseless!

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CreateNoReflection In reply to Melanophrionsa [2009-08-07 22:19:25 +0000 UTC]

^^ I'm much the same!
I'm really excited to go to college in a few weeks, it's going to be so different from high school. I look forward to that aspect alone.

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Melanophrionsa In reply to CreateNoReflection [2009-08-11 12:52:20 +0000 UTC]

That is a great point about it More independence, too! What are you studying there?

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CreateNoReflection In reply to Melanophrionsa [2009-08-11 14:23:31 +0000 UTC]

I'm taking Creative Writing and Music Theory. I'm really excited for both, but the writing in particular. ^w^

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Melanophrionsa In reply to CreateNoReflection [2009-10-05 10:04:50 +0000 UTC]

Sorry for my ridiculously late reply to this! Have you started yet? How is Creative Writing and Music Theory going?

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CreateNoReflection In reply to Melanophrionsa [2009-10-08 03:06:37 +0000 UTC]

Hi! Aw, no worries Yeah, I started school on August 24, and it is interesting to say the least. My Music Theory professor is this neat lady, I want to say she's from Russia, but I could be wrong, with her accent's it's hard to call. Anyway, she can be a little intense sometimes but she's a wonderful teacher. She randomly goes off on tangents sometimes and it really helps take off some of the stress of learning so much all at once, y'know? I'm struggling though, and that bothers me, but she gave me info for some tutoring stuff there at school so I'm going to go look into that. Creative Writing is...heh, the class is great, but my instructor is another story. He's a good teacher, but he has almost no humour to him, and I swear he uses these huge words just to make himself sound smarter. It drives me mad. He sounds like a great deal of his cheerful creativity has been stomped out of him. I absolutely love the class though, it's so different from the one I took Senior year. The people in this class actually enjoy writing, they WANT to write! I am THRILLED! Finally I'm surrounded by people who actually take the time to make something deep and beautiful. There's a girl in my critique group that wrote about parental abuse suffered by two brothers and how they only have each other for any kind of support or strength. It blew my mind and I realized that these people really do their best to create something powerful and worthwhile. Oh, look at me rambling on. XD I guess I'm just so happy about it, this is going to be a wonderful semester, I think.

How are things going for you? I've..missed talking with you and hearing about what you're up to these days!

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Melanophrionsa In reply to CreateNoReflection [2009-11-18 20:45:13 +0000 UTC]

Ahh how fast time passes! Sorry again for the long wait- the internet here is so worthless and the workload is extreme!

Well I'm in uni now! I started back in September and the workload has only climbed! I'm marginally impressed with most of my class, some people are more interesting than others there though!

There's so much drama here! Everyone gets uppity about everything, there's always a new rumour going around, it's maddening!

I've had so much to do- Last week I just finished a rather large screensaver and splashscreen project, along with a good 2200 word essay to go with it! In for friday this week is another 2200 word essay on retro gaming (I've chosen "Frogger" as my subject), and all the while we've spent the last two months working on a year-wide group project to create a game for keystage 1 students!

I must admit I am having a lot of fun, but at the same time I go between stages of feeling bogged down and stressed to bouts of carefree natured joy!

I'm finding a lot of faults in the people around me--so many are horribly untrustworthy and it's getting me down- that and the workload and being so far from home where my really good friends are is a bit draining.

Unfortunately the internet in my flat is terrible- it's only recently become stable, and it's still slow as hell! The heating in my room still doesn't work- and as it gets colder for winter it's starting to get a little unbearable!

I'm glad to hear that you're having fun and enjoying being surrounded by like-minded people! Sorry to hear about your emotionally dead lecturer, but maybe he has a kind of quiet humour? Guess you'll find out later in the year!

I hope nothing bad has happened in the past month between your message and my reply! Sorry again for the long wait!

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CreateNoReflection In reply to Melanophrionsa [2009-11-20 01:37:57 +0000 UTC]

Hello! No need to apologize, I've been rather scattered myself.
Congratulations! Ah, yes. I get along greatly with all but ONE of my classmates--he's an arrogant prick who believes himself an expert in all things. But I'll not rant. ^^ Please tell me the courses you're taking! [I was forced to withdraw from my music theory course because I fell too far behind. In my defense the instructor moves too quickly through her lessons.] Writing is working wonderfully, though! In fact I got to present one of my stories in a critique today. Highly enjoyable stuff, I must say!

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Melanophrionsa In reply to CreateNoReflection [2009-12-10 13:03:43 +0000 UTC]

Good that things are going so well, minus that one guy.

I'm taking Games Design All my modules are game related, right now we're doing introductions to different parts of game studies and design, our group project (A year long project in which we're making an educational game for keystage 1 students), introduction to image editing finished a while back but that was really fun, and today I'm about to go in and do storyboarding and drawing skills

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CreateNoReflection In reply to Melanophrionsa [2009-12-11 04:54:24 +0000 UTC]

Wow!! That's intense!!
I've wondered what it would be like to do stuff like that, but somehow sadly I don't think I would have the patience to learn. It is a wonderful study, though!! I'm glad you're doing it!!

Well, I just got signed up for my spring semester. This time I'm going to take the Literary Magazine course, which will be wonderful, I'm going to learn how to professionally edit different works and learn how the publication process works! ^^ I'm so excited for that!
My other class is History of Western Civilization. I'm not sure how I feel about that one, but nothing else I looked at really felt right. So, I'm hoping things will go better next semester than this one did. I'm off for Christmas break now, so I'm looking to get lots of rest and reevaluate things. **

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Melanophrionsa In reply to CreateNoReflection [2010-09-18 04:29:40 +0000 UTC]

Hey there!

Since last reply I've nearly died twice and spent most of my time in and out of hospital- fun times eh?

I got into my next year, though my grades suffered greatly due to everything. It depresses me greatly but as the grades don't matter on the first year it could be worse.

How are you doing? I'm sorry for my lack of replies...I'm very bad at this aren't I?

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CreateNoReflection In reply to Melanophrionsa [2010-09-19 01:20:56 +0000 UTC]

Haha no worse than myself. ^^
2 near-deaths and lots of hospital time? What happened??!?!!

Heh, well, you sound like you did better school-wise than I did, and that's no exaggeration. I dropped the Lit Magazine course and failed the unholy heck out of my Western Civ. course.

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Melanophrionsa In reply to CreateNoReflection [2010-09-27 21:27:01 +0000 UTC]

Yikes :/ What happened? Sudden change of goals?

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CreateNoReflection In reply to Melanophrionsa [2010-09-28 00:13:32 +0000 UTC]

Okay, lots of details coming your way, you ready?

No, I was having medical issues during the spring, and it really interfered with my classes. The Lit-Magazine was completely pointless, I had nothing to do every day and I saw no sense in continuing to take it and paying for it if I was just going to sit there all day every day.
I couldn't focus on anything, and my short-term memory is SHORT short-term, as in seconds. I tried so hard in my history class, but I didn't have the physical ability to retain anything that I heard. I still have trouble with it, and I'm hoping to find out why soon.
Now, thanks to medical and financial troubles, I won't be returning until the spring IF I'm physically able by then. If not, then who knows.
I wish I could understand it, it's incredibly frustrating.

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Melanophrionsa In reply to CreateNoReflection [2010-10-01 10:53:33 +0000 UTC]

:/ Medical issues suck...Guess we've both had nasty nastiness thrown at us this year huh...

Me I fell mysteriously and very suddenly ill at the end of January, couldn't eat, within days I couldn't even move, it progressed rapidly--luckily someone, my girlfriend, was there when it was getting to it's worst and she took me to the hospital--good thing too. The nurse later told me that if she hadn't taken me right then I would have likely died at home.

There is a lot more to that story, if you get curious a bunch of it is here in my journal.

Took me quite a while to fully recover from everything...Then more happened later, documented here

So yeah, this year hasn't exactly been a blast. Luckily it's drawing to a close- My end of year is Oct 25th, after that it'll hopefully be a new slate of success.

I really hope your doctors solve your dilemma soon :/ Brain damaging things are really my worst nightmare--I once studied a man with a powerful short term memory problem that ruined his whole life, his STM was so short he would look at something, act as if it were brand new, then forget the second he looked away and treat it as brand new the second he got back. He'd spend hours writing "I've just woken up for the first time" in his journal, then wondering who had written it, crossing it out, and writing the same thing again.

His wife is having him kept alive. Selfish bitch. He lives in that state and I can't imagine anything worse... Hopefully there is a simple solution for it in your case and you'll be right as rain (if rain is right) soon.

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CreateNoReflection In reply to Melanophrionsa [2010-10-10 05:29:01 +0000 UTC]

Wow, that is some malady you had. That worries me, have you experienced anything like that again since? That's freaking scary!
As for your bizarre series of events at the hospital, that's even scarier. Just reading it make my skin crawl. Are you okay??!! I don't even know what to say now, you've had such terrible luck. I feel like my situation pales a considerable amount compared to yours.

I can't help but agree with you on this man's wife being a selfish bitch. That's all I will say on that.

As for my doctors, I just got the news the other day that I finally got the appointment to meet with a neurologist and get fully checked out. It's on December 2nd, so not too long now and I'm very excited about it. I'm scared but I just have to remind myself that it'll start getting sorted out very soon. I also know I've got it easy, even if it doesn't feel that way. There are many many people out there living with worse things than this. Sometimes that's hard for me to believe but I know it's true. ^^ I don't know what to do with myself most days, much too much time on my hands, but I'm doing better as far as my bipolar disorder is concerned. I'm on a good medication, highs and lows under control, occasionally more severe but nothing to worry over, glad to say. I had a session with my therapist the other day and to my surprise I was confident the entire time. I don't even know why! It felt pretty damn good to feel confident in myself, though!

I hope you're doing well, hopefully much better than these horrible things you've been experiencing as of late. I wish you all the best, my friend.

<3
Raine

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Melanophrionsa In reply to CreateNoReflection [2010-10-17 19:25:38 +0000 UTC]

Heya I'm still healthy...Back in october, historically my worst month every year peaking at the 25th. If no one dies or falls horribly ill I will be very happy.

I wish you the best of luck for your appointment on the 2nd! I seems a long time to wait for such a big thing though...I hope you don't get bounced about too much--When I was young I was in hospital quite a lot, got bounced a lot and a tad experimented on.

It's good to feel confident, and it's always good to find someone you can confide in...Personally I turned away from therapists. The first person to act as a therapist for me told me my life was a sinking ship, and the second one was the most awesome person ever.......until we found out he was locking his daughter in cupboards to keep her away from all the nasty people outside. He was fired. After that I pretty much decided to avoid them, I confide in myself.

The 25th is what I regard as the end of my year- So hopefully the one coming up will be better than this one has been. I'm eagerly awaiting sending this year away forever and embracing a new chance to not die out.

I hear you guys have better doctors over in the US than we have here...Hopefully that means you're going to get tip top treatment instead of the trash I got most of the time. I truly hope you get better soon after they see you!

Have a good one I hope you are well.

~Demi

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CreateNoReflection In reply to Melanophrionsa [2010-10-20 19:17:39 +0000 UTC]

I'm glad to hear you're doing better. I was pretty scared for you. You've had worse luck in hospitals and illness than I have!
Goodness! I hope that man got some worse punishment down the line than just being fired. What he was doing was terrible!!
Well, the best of luck on your new year. Thank you for the well wishes, I appreciate them very much. <3!!

<3
Raine

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