HOME | DD

Description
Finally, the day you've been waiting for and also the day you've been dreading.
Gun in hand, you find yourself staring at your reflection in the mirror. No emotion, tall, proud and with the pistol pointed directly at the side of your head.
Sometimes you would question what would bring you to this point, to grab the pistol your father thought he had hidden so well from you. And right now in that moment you're not completely sure why you're making this decision. Maybe it's just being so tired of faking a smile, or so tired of having to deal with all the bullshit life had to throw at you.
It's an illness you had gotten a while back, the damn thing nearly destroying you bit by bit. Depression wasn't contagious yet you were the one to get it. You wonder how people without it functioned at all, since it's been a few years since you declared yourself 'sane'. It's a disease that took many other people's lives before and here it is about to take your own. Another victim of this so called 'cry for attention' the media and other douchebags would say.
Although, when you think about it, your life really wasn't all that bad to start with. Childhood memories were still there, and as you grew into an adult you could realize how horrible the world really was without that bit of innocence clouding your thoughts. Nothing was sunshine and rainbows at this point, at least that's what you kept telling yourself. Medication after medication, doctors appointments every single damn week for the past while. Nothing seemed to be working.
But as you stare yourself down in the mirror, your reflection's facial expression starts to soften. It was only then you noticed you were tense, and you started to think back on the last couple of years.
Childhood memories were the best, all those big adventures you used to have. All the friends that came and went, the open fields and rare late nights of staying up and having sleepovers. The home you grew up in as well as the pet dog you always loved and played with in your backyard. It sure was a shame it was in the past, but it's definitely something to remember every time you wanted to smile for just a moment.
And as years went on, you start to remember meeting new friends, you new group starting to come back to your mind and you feeling your lips start to tug up into a small smile.
That one person you grew to know and love with all your heart, they were perfect for you in every single way. Of course, they knew that and in a way you know they felt the same way with all the late night talks and all the jokes you both threw around. You both shed tears, shared stories and helped each other out through thick and thin. They were the missing piece of the puzzle you've always wanted and craved for. Their laugh was perfect, their smile and their humor. They always did their best to make sure you were okay, and they did everything they could to make sure it stayed that way.
It was only then you notice you're smiling, but your eyes are tearing up.
Maybe this was a mistake, maybe if you put the gun down and take in a few deep breaths, you'll realize it won't be so bad after all. You can call up your best friend and talk it out, seek the help you need and help yourself in order to get better.

But before you could move your hand you felt your finger twitch.

It was too late and you had already pulled the trigger.

Description
Finally, the day you've been waiting for and also the day you've been dreading.
Gun in hand, you find yourself staring at your reflection in the mirror. No emotion, tall, proud and with the pistol pointed directly at the side of your head.
Sometimes you would question what would bring you to this point, to grab the pistol your father thought he had hidden so well from you. And right now in that moment you're not completely sure why you're making this decision. Maybe it's just being so tired of faking a smile, or so tired of having to deal with all the bullshit life had to throw at you.
It's an illness you had gotten a while back, the damn thing nearly destroying you bit by bit. Depression wasn't contagious yet you were the one to get it. You wonder how people without it functioned at all, since it's been a few years since you declared yourself 'sane'. It's a disease that took many other people's lives before and here it is about to take your own. Another victim of this so called 'cry for attention' the media and other douchebags would say.
Although, when you think about it, your life really wasn't all that bad to start with. Childhood memories were still there, and as you grew into an adult you could realize how horrible the world really was without that bit of innocence clouding your thoughts. Nothing was sunshine and rainbows at this point, at least that's what you kept telling yourself. Medication after medication, doctors appointments every single damn week for the past while. Nothing seemed to be working.
But as you stare yourself down in the mirror, your reflection's facial expression starts to soften. It was only then you noticed you were tense, and you started to think back on the last couple of years.
Childhood memories were the best, all those big adventures you used to have. All the friends that came and went, the open fields and rare late nights of staying up and having sleepovers. The home you grew up in as well as the pet dog you always loved and played with in your backyard. It sure was a shame it was in the past, but it's definitely something to remember every time you wanted to smile for just a moment.
And as years went on, you start to remember meeting new friends, you new group starting to come back to your mind and you feeling your lips start to tug up into a small smile.
That one person you grew to know and love with all your heart, they were perfect for you in every single way. Of course, they knew that and in a way you know they felt the same way with all the late night talks and all the jokes you both threw around. You both shed tears, shared stories and helped each other out through thick and thin. They were the missing piece of the puzzle you've always wanted and craved for. Their laugh was perfect, their smile and their humor. They always did their best to make sure you were okay, and they did everything they could to make sure it stayed that way.
It was only then you notice you're smiling, but your eyes are tearing up.
Maybe this was a mistake, maybe if you put the gun down and take in a few deep breaths, you'll realize it won't be so bad after all. You can call up your best friend and talk it out, seek the help you need and help yourself in order to get better.

But before you could move your hand you felt your finger twitch.

It was too late and you had already pulled the trigger.