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depressioncomix — depression comix #379
Published: 2018-01-19 20:43:27 +0000 UTC; Views: 1538; Favourites: 66; Downloads: 0
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Comments: 19
Killed creativity.
Oh man,
That's what happened when I became depressed.
And it was a clinical depression.
Honestly?
I never, ever, imagined that I would ever experience that.
I am extremely grateful that I'm not depressed anymore,
And that my creativity came back,
But I remember that I did initially blame my medication for the killed creativity.
Thankfully,
The medication has been adjusted to a level that's working for me.
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Perfect timing with the comic. I'm finally about to meet with a doctor today to discuss medication. I don't know what to expect, though.
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This is the same conversation I had with myself about one month ago. I was so terrified I'd loose myself or be further crippled by negative side effects, I cried myself to sleep for many nights before I convinced myself that I was already loosing myself and I needed to try.
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I went through the same thing when I started mine. Fortunately, it worked out.
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The wrong pills can have horrible effects, and sadly the process of finding the right ones is always filled with trial and error. Some odd changes are normal for the first couple weeks, but if they persist you MUST go back to your doctor. A good doctor will go through as many available options as possible with you. Remember, meds aren't there to make you artificially happy. They're there to make you become your regular self again.
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I was happy to take mine. I was desperate for anything to put a stop to the depression (all better now)
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Excellent and accurate content as always. This comic is painfully relatable .... Her fear is extremely valid to my experience.
Back when I was 19, I was dealing with crippling depression and social anxiety, too scared to leave my house and too miserable to fight the fear... At the advice of my therapist, I tried Citalopram (an antidepressant/anxiety combo, the generic Celexa). It was a huge mistake and I still regret it. The first four weeks were the worst insomnia I ever had. My creativity died, the libido followed... The hardest part was I became so angry all the time. I blew up at my friends, my family, basically anyone and everything at the drop of a hat. Part of me was just standing, trapped in the back of my mind, watching in sheer horror as this new me tried and nearly succeeded to destroy every relationship I had. 6 months I waited for my moods to stabilize but when the anger just kept getting worse, and my actions led to me being isolated and more depressed than when I started, I stopped taking them.
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If you're taking any antidepressive and they have adverse affects after such a short time as you describe, it is important to return to the doctor right away and change to different drugs. If you were still taking the drugs after 6 months even after having side effects like insomnia after the first month, your doctor should have been on top of that and changing your medication ASAP. Many people have adverse reactions with their first round of meds, I certainly did, but finding meds with the active ingredient and dosage that's best for you may take some time. Many doctors don't communicate this well enough, and it only makes things worse.
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My doctor said the insomnia and everything besides the anger was normal.... Part of my body adjusting to the meds... And I tried to trust them that it would change. After the mess, I never tried them in any form again. I ended up managing to conquer my problems without medication. I started going to the gym, the endorphins helped me get my head above water. After I started that habit, I changed my diet, started taking St. John's Wort and liquorice tincture, and with the help of the few people who's friendships I didn't lose, I'm at a relatively stable place. Depression spikes are for a week every once in a while instead of constant, and I can handle that.
I wish my Doctor had talked to me more, and been more helpful, but they weren't
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I had the same issue with celexa too I tried fighting the depression anxiety and self hatred for 8 years still trying new meds I've been fighting close to 12 years now I was diagnosed with bipolar disorder in October and have been working with my doctors and therapists the hardest thing for me to do is admit that I need help and actually accept the help but I realized sometimes you really can't do it alone and it's ok to get help another thing I'm realizing now after 4 years of medications is that you have to work with the meds they aren't a miracle cure they just help you adapt to the darkness at least at first eventually you start seeing that it's not as dark as it seems like when you enter a room and shut the lights off you can't see anything you just shuffle your feet with your hands stretched out to avoid obstacles but after some time your eyes adjust and you can start seeing a little better making it easy to navigate through the room
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I ended up fighting it using exercise, a D vitamin heavy diet, and homeopathic remedies instead of pharmaceutical medication. Much as you describe meds, there was no miracle cure, but slowly, over the course of 6 years, it helped me get the worst of it under control. Small beacons of light appeared in the pit, which let me see that it wasn't all as scary and crushing as I had thought. It became a world of highs and lows, instead of just lows. I have been allowed to grasp as moments of happiness which had, for so long, seemed impossible to reach. I am in no way saying that people shouldn't try meds if they're truly stuck in despair, but I found a way without it after that horrible experience, and it worked.
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That's good you found a positive way to cope with stuff I'm attempting to but it doesn't help that I procrastinate and add in adhd makes things a challenge but honestly I know I can find the solution to cope with everything I just have a difficult time sticking to it and also I'm not sure how to let myself be happy I set myself up for failure every time I guess I should stop running from my problems and finally confront them... thanks for being the first person to comment on here you really did make it easier for me to comment maybe more people will follow your lead like I did. It definitely made me feel like I wasn't alone in the dark 😊
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Do you write at all? It doesn't matter if it's a diary or just vent-y fiction, writing your feelings, even from the perspective of an OC helps SO MUCH. We all procrastinate Goznog. I'm ADD, high functioning autistic, and deal with PTSD. Some days, I play video games instead of doing art or writing. It all doesn't help, but you can still work with it. Letting yourself be happy is difficult because it requires reasons to BE happy. Letting yourself step into the light. If you need someone to talk to, to give you a hand, or to vent to, send me a note. Running from your problems just tires you out, learn to face them. Ask for help facing them when you need it. I'm glad my commenting could help you. I believe in you.
I know how hard it is to be open about these kinds of personal struggles. I have been working on being more open about mine because so many of my followers are much younger than myself. Making sure they know they aren't the only ones with these feelings is important. Letting them know it is not weakness to feel this way. You are not alone. We are Legion, and we need to support each other! 
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I write some stuff on here sort of I usually write something in the journal here but I just delete it the only reason I have journals on here is because I showed them to my brother and he told me to upload them yesterday I wrote at least 3 journal entries but ended up deleting them.
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Totally. Sorry it's so dark, everyone had their own experience trying medication. Some people, it really does help. Sadly, I wasn't one of them but I figured I would share my experience since it seemed kind of appropriate here and, partially, in the hopes that others would share too.
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It is. I have always found it is easier to share these personal things if someone else starts it, you know?
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