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DOTB18 — Ed's Short Rants
Published: 2010-04-14 02:08:18 +0000 UTC; Views: 17705; Favourites: 129; Downloads: 10
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Hey, don't call me puny.Would you stop calling me puny?!
Stop calling me a pipsqueak, it puts me in really bad mood.
DON'T CALL ME SMALL! I'LL BREAK DOWN YOUR FEET AND STICK 'EM ON YOUR HEAD!!!
You couldn't see me since I'm so short you couldn't distinguish me from all the grains of sand. VERY FUNNY!!!
Shorty?! Could a shorty do this?! What else you want to call me; a half-pint bean-sprout midget?! I'm still growing, you idiot(s)!
WHO ARE YOU CALLING A MICRO-SIZED HALF-PINT WHO DIDN'T GROW UP BECAUSE HE DOESN'T DRINK MILK?!!!
WHO ARE YOU CALLING A RUNT SO TINY HE COULD ONLY BE SEEN WITH
A MAGNIFYING GLASS, YOU JERK?!!!
WHO ARE YOU CALLING A MOUSY LITTLE PIPSQUEAK?!!!
Nobody calls me a pipsqueak and gets away with it.
WHO ARE YOU CALLING SO SMALL YOU WANT TO CRUSH LIKE AN ANT?!!!
Who are you calling shorty?
WHO ARE YOU CALLING A PIPSQUEAK?!
WHO ARE YOU CALLING A DWARF?!!! GET BACK HERE AND SAY THAT TO MY FACE!!!
WHO ARE YOU CALLING SMALL?!!!
WHO ARE YOU CALLING THE GUINESS BOOK OF WORLD RECORDS TINIEST SHORTY?!!!
WHO ARE YOU CALLING A PIPSQUEAK-MIDGET WHO CAN EVEN GO TO THE BEACH BECAUSE HE'S SO SMALL HE'LL SINK INTO THE SAND AND WHEN THE TIDE COMES IN HE WOULDN'T NEED TO WORRY ABOUT *breath* DROWNING BECAUSE HE'S SO SMALL HE CAN BREATH OXYGEN ATOMS THROUGH THE WATER?!!!
I'M NOT A SHRIMP!!!
What, did you think I'd still be a runt when I'm eighteen years old?!
WHO ARE YOU CALLING A SNOT-NOSED SHORTY?!!!
WHO ARE CALLING A SHRIMP SO SMALL HE COULD RIDE ON THE BACK OF A GRASSHOPPER?!!!
What's wrong with you people? I'm not short!
CAN A RUNT DO THIS?!!!
DON'T CALL ME LITTLE!!!
C'mon. Say "small". I dare you.
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Comments: 137
Me cause you are an ant short stop. You could get lost in freshly cut grass you pipsqueak!
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WHO ARE YOU CALLING A PIPSQUEAK?! WHY DON'T COME OVER HERE AND SAY THAT TO MY FACE!!! I DARE YA!!!
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I know how it feels to be called short, even though i'm not short.
IT'S WERID.
I'M ONLY 5'3 GEEZ. everyone is just tall -nods-
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....'short'-tempered as always, eh, Edo? XD
((I'm one inch shorter than Ed. I'm 5'3" he's 5'4". WHY AM I SO SHORT?!?!))
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When Ed says he's 5'4", he's including his boots and hair. He's really only 4'11".
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O.O ....IM TALLER THAN HIM! Not really XD lol I really am an inch shorter than him XD ik he's 4'11"....im 4'10"
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But you said you were 5'3", which means you're four inches taller... Don't tell Ed I said that, though.
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....I lied....
I dunt liek being shorter than Edo 
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O_o Wait, I'm confused. Are you 5'3" or 4'10"?
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I'm still peeved that I'm shorter than him.
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Well Ed's only four-foot-eleven, so can't be that much shorter.
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Ed was barely sixteen, so you still have ways to go.
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...me too, Ed, me too.
Thanks for these
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HAHA I LOVE VIC AND THE WAY HE DOES THESE! I'M SO GLAD THEY PICKED HIM!
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Pffft. Vic Mignogna made Edward so epic XDD
[link]
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you missed last part on the 6th line, he says: "I'M STILL GROWING YOU BACK WATER DESSERT IDIOTS!!"
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I left that out on purpose so that you could say it to anyone, not just "backwater desert idiots."
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so funny, i some times pull these quotes on my friends just to see if they get it.
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lol, that reminded me of when Ed's automail was broken, he went back to the Rockbell place to get it up. Pinako called him a subatomic particle XD
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Yeah, there are different versions of that. Here's the first anime.
Pinako: Heh! Yet it seems like you've gotten smaller!
Edward: WHO ARE YOU CALLING SMALL YOU MINIATURE SIZED HAG?!
Pinako: You're shorter than your temper!
Edward: YOU'RE SO SHORT YOU'RE TWO-DIMENSIONAL!
Pinako: Automail moron!
Edward: Grandma flea!
Here's the second anime.
Pinako: I know I haven't sen you for a while Ed, but you've gone and grown smaller.
Edward: !... Granny, you've got it wrong. You're supposed to, "How big you've grown lately, Ed?"
Pinako: But why would I say somehing that so clearly untrue?
Edward: I'M STILL TALLER THAN YOU, YOU MINI-HAG!!!
Here's another one from the second anime.
Pinako: I'f you don't drink it, you'll stay short forever.
Edward: You mean like you, you sawed-off old hag?
Pinako: What was that? You little half-pint midget!
Edward: SHRIMPPED-DOWN MINI-WITCH!
Pinako: MICRO-PEEWEE!
Edward: MANIAC BABY!
Pinako: SUBATOMIC SHRIMP!
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lol, you knew what i meant at least. i only really caught the subatomic part, i was busy with something else. it might've been LOTRO, cos i'm totally addicted and such..... ah, well. i at least remembered it XD
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Dude...... I'm SO gonna use this to practice for Aki-con this fall. THANK YOU!
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You're absolutly welcome! Let me know how that pans out.
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This made my day. I'm constantly getting called short (which I don't get...cause I'm not THAT short) and I've gotten to the point where I say similar things as Edward. I've been looking everywhere for his rants. ^.^
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Thank you so much for putting this up.
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Sweet Nice work i've looked long and hard for these
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Thank you and you're welcome.
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