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Published: 2005-04-19 05:25:31 +0000 UTC; Views: 103; Favourites: 1; Downloads: 1
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Description
A day like no other, to have a taste of perfection, and to have it cruelly taken away.Tears, sweet tears, caress my face, tears like soft, soft fingers.
An unrequited love, ethereal love, unreachable love…
There is one that I love, one that cannot return that love, the one love in the world I would wish for, the one love I cannot receive, but out of reach it is,
I try, my arms cannot cover the distance, my words do not penetrate the cruel, think fog.
My love for her does, it reaches through, and I see her, I smile, but I cannot reach her, that smile fades, fades and falls. Falls like a burst balloon in the sky, a burst balloon with a lead weight attached to the bottom.
The ground below me, suddenly disappears beneath my feet, I fall, free fall, with nothing to break my landing, I land, I hurt, I cannot breathe, My life leaves me, like a bullet from a gun.
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Comments: 11
Psycho-moose [2005-04-28 08:26:04 +0000 UTC]
its a good descriptionative thingy... but two things
but out of reach it is - (yeah whateva yoda) try: but it is out of reach.
and.. i dont like the ending.. 'i die'?
it doesn;t match the rest of the poem, its not as descriptive. and dieing isn;t a good thing to do... (duh)
i say that because i know you wrote it from feeling
but i'm so pathetic i have to asses the poetry side of things anyway
hope you feel better now!
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EvilMidget In reply to Psycho-moose [2005-04-28 09:55:25 +0000 UTC]
I like the idea of the yoda thing...
although i did change the last couple of words, although, i diddnt mind "I Die." as it was an impacting sentance
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Psycho-moose In reply to EvilMidget [2005-04-29 08:09:05 +0000 UTC]
i like it much better now... nice imagery, well done!
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Pazreal [2005-04-21 06:47:22 +0000 UTC]
We're here for you. You can talk to us about anything.
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pirate-soul [2005-04-20 10:31:39 +0000 UTC]
Hello lovely one.
A very nice poem. Well written, I believe.
I also believe in you.
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AntiTB [2005-04-20 08:31:34 +0000 UTC]
Life wasn't meant to be easy, Hubby. If it makes you feel any better, I know how you feel and you're not the only one. Loves always, your Wife
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silver-elph [2005-04-19 11:15:19 +0000 UTC]
I can't believe I did this.
I just can't believe it.
I'm so sorry.
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EvilMidget In reply to silver-elph [2005-04-19 22:54:37 +0000 UTC]
please dont feel bad...its not your fault, you cant help how you feel
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BlindedVisions [2005-04-19 07:10:10 +0000 UTC]
I wish we didn't have to go through so many different forms of pain till we find something good enough to wash it all away.
I understand the emotions and though no one normally sees past how it feels in the present, it does fade and makes room for something/someone else or reconciliation.
Of course I don't know the details. But in some situations, unrequited love doesn't stay that way. Even if that doesn't seem possible.
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