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Published: 2010-03-23 06:06:44 +0000 UTC; Views: 179; Favourites: 2; Downloads: 4
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Description
The pain that will never die, the tears that I forever cry, the anger that will not subside, the emotions that no longer hide.You'll never know the loneliness I feel, you can't see that wounds that will never heal; thanks for showing me that you care, while I wait for my heart to tear, you will never understand why I want to die … just look into my eyes and see the tears that I cry …
All this hell and all this pain, is it all in vain? I could grab that knife and end this life … watch my blood fall as the engulfing darkness calls … but I cant end it, as I take another hit, add it to the endless sorrow, while I wait for another tomorrow … Just another day that goes by, while I live by all your lies …
Will it ever go away? While, by the knife, I lay… The darkness beckons, it won't get better I reckon … Still I hold on, while its your warm embrace that I long … You're the reason I fight, every day and every night, I do this all for you, as I know you would to … You're the light that guides my way, so in your warm embrace I forever lay …
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Comments: 60
FallenLilith96 In reply to ??? [2012-05-13 09:05:55 +0000 UTC]
This is actually dedicated to my ex.. We were together for 2.5 years.. I am now happily engaged to someone new.
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Leveve In reply to FallenLilith96 [2012-05-13 19:34:40 +0000 UTC]
Congrats, if I may ask, how long have you been together, I am engaged myself, and we were together for 2 years. Before he asked me.
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FallenLilith96 In reply to Leveve [2012-05-21 12:09:04 +0000 UTC]
Ive known him for 4 years.. we have been engaged since october.. we split up for 8 months and 2 months after we got back together he asked me
Well I wish you all the best
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Leveve In reply to FallenLilith96 [2012-05-23 05:50:18 +0000 UTC]
You two live together? I live with mine and since my heart surgery we had to postpone and thank you.
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FallenLilith96 In reply to Leveve [2012-05-24 09:49:31 +0000 UTC]
not yet but we are hoping to by the end of the year. we both have to much family drama going on.
aww well I hope you are okay. and at least you have him to help you
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Leveve In reply to FallenLilith96 [2012-05-25 10:11:20 +0000 UTC]
Well, he does work for blizzard. Shhh.. and he wants to make sure I am alright.. I am sorry your both having problems, I know how it is since his family has money and mine does not. It is a pain, GL
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FallenLilith96 In reply to Leveve [2012-05-30 01:36:44 +0000 UTC]
omg blizzard.. im so jealous D:
well thats good he wants to make sure youre alright its good that he cares.
his family hates me.. my family disapproves of him.. it sucks.. and we both cant afford to move out together
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Leveve In reply to FallenLilith96 [2012-05-31 12:12:09 +0000 UTC]
Yes my love is a GM.
And his family is slowly is starting to accept me. If you don't mind me asking. Do you live close or far from each other?
And my recovery is going well, the only thing I do is the wash. LOL
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FallenLilith96 In reply to Leveve [2012-06-04 09:06:30 +0000 UTC]
wow thats awesome
ah thats good well we live in seperate states and cant see each other often
hehe well thats good at least
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Leveve In reply to FallenLilith96 [2012-06-05 05:28:18 +0000 UTC]
Yeah, he's a GM. He's trying to get me a job there. Seperate states,that must so suck, how do you keep in touch? Me and my love, we used to use skype all the time. Until he moved in.
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FallenLilith96 In reply to Leveve [2012-06-06 06:17:35 +0000 UTC]
thats awesome. i would love to be a GM hehe.
it does suck we're on skype as much as we can be. half the time we even sleep on skype together
we are hoping by the end of the year we will be able to move in together.
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Leveve In reply to FallenLilith96 [2012-06-08 01:33:44 +0000 UTC]
Yes, its not a easy job and now that D3 is out he's swamped with Wow and D3.How many state away if you dont mind me asking me and my love where four states away.
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FallenLilith96 In reply to Leveve [2012-06-08 01:47:32 +0000 UTC]
yeah i bet it isnt. ive been playing wow and d3 non stop lately xD
3 states away. we live in australia.
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Leveve In reply to FallenLilith96 [2012-06-08 09:45:43 +0000 UTC]
I've been playing too, I've been in bed, I even try to get up and he's like "What are you doing" He is so good to me. And wow australia, I have never been there. I hope the weather is nice. I hope you are enjoying D3.
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FallenLilith96 In reply to Leveve [2012-06-09 05:40:25 +0000 UTC]
ah awesome. aww hes so sweet, thats good
ive been sick the last couple of days. my boy is always texting me telling me to get rest and to not go out. but you sound happy and thats whats important.
its winter here I hate it, i miss the sun. its so cold and it keeps raining
I am, its an awesome game but been to tired, last day of school yesterday, go back in about two weeks
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Leveve In reply to FallenLilith96 [2012-06-09 06:03:41 +0000 UTC]
I hope you get better soon, and school? You in college? I have been out of college for two years got a my degree in psychology, I am taking a break from college. I go back in October to start on my Master's. I am going dress shopping as soon as the doc gives me the ok. Take Care.
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FallenLilith96 In reply to Leveve [2012-06-13 11:24:35 +0000 UTC]
thanks im at Tafe.. its kinda between highschool and college.. not sure if you guys have it where you are. wow psychology.. always wanted to study that but i dropped out of my last year of highschool.. i was picked on a lot and couldnt take it so i left. im studying business right now.. might sound boring but i enjoy it.
masters, thats awesome Im only up to certificate 3.. just finished cert 2.
hehe awesome im going shopping this weekend with my girl cant wait
hope you start feeling better soon, and you take care too
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Leveve In reply to FallenLilith96 [2012-06-19 10:18:53 +0000 UTC]
I know how it is to be picked on was teased my whole life, but I also went through 13 different schools. They have those here, I just don't know what they are called. And business, good thing to study, btw hw are you and your boy doing? Me and mine are picking out colors and stuff and, I think I found my dress.. Take Care.
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FallenLilith96 In reply to Leveve [2012-06-22 01:32:11 +0000 UTC]
oh wow.. that sucks and so many schools.. i only went through 5 different schools.. never graduated, ever.
ah okay cool.
yeah i enjoy it, it just gets boring at some stages. plus me and my two friends are ahead of the class.
oh awesome are you going tradition white or another colour? my step sister had a red dress and my mum had a pink dress. we are good hes been busy with work and ive been busy helping my friends out with problems they have so we havent spoken much. on top of that my dog is sick and im in bed with her most of the day coz she can barely move.
you take care too
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Leveve In reply to FallenLilith96 [2012-06-26 03:31:46 +0000 UTC]
Sorry for the late replay and thats good that you are ahead of the class. Keep up the good work. I am going with the traditional while, I am having my great grandmother's dress remade. We are going with sky blue and white for our colors. I am sorry about your dog, I hope she feels better. You take care.
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FallenLilith96 In reply to Leveve [2012-06-27 00:04:15 +0000 UTC]
thanks, I will try . oh thats good I bet you'll look beautiful
. it sounds wonderful and I bet it will be one of the greatest days of your lives. Hope you have fun and all goes well
She had an injection and has been taking tablets she is going much better now
take care xo
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Leveve In reply to FallenLilith96 [2012-06-28 23:07:46 +0000 UTC]
It's a older style of dress if I find a pic of it I'll post it on my page. How is school going for you? How's your boy? I am glad to her about your dog, I am glad that she is getting better. Take care.
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FallenLilith96 In reply to Leveve [2012-06-29 09:49:27 +0000 UTC]
yay awesome thanks
school isnt going that great.. i was sick this week so im behind on this weeks lesson.
me and my boy are fine though we havent been able to talk that much lately coz some of my family members have been sick.
my dog is back to being her active annoying self
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Leveve In reply to FallenLilith96 [2012-07-03 11:38:54 +0000 UTC]
Time flies when your planning a wedding, my dress is in the works of being made. I am sorry to hear that you are sick, have you been to the doctor yet? I hope you get better soon. I hope you get to talk to your boy soon, I know how it is with taking care of family. And you know how puppies are. Take care.
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FallenLilith96 In reply to Leveve [2012-07-04 07:34:21 +0000 UTC]
awesome yeah i bet.. how much longer til the date?
Im going to the doctor in 3 days, im sure its nothing serious, ill just get some tablets and start feeling better in no time.
we havent been able to talk much, hes taking it hard. but i have to be there for my sick family. and on top of it, my childhood pets got put down yesterday. i just need to be close to my family right now because i dont know how much longer they have left, theyve all been really sick. i spend as much time as i can with him lately but its not as much as he would like but i have other things i must do as well.
hope all is well with you, take care
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Leveve In reply to FallenLilith96 [2012-07-20 19:50:57 +0000 UTC]
Hello, sorry for the late reply, I have been so busy with fittings and trying to book a hall and photographer and watching my brothers and omg... such a mess. I hope you are doing and feeling better. I hope school is going well for you to. The date is Feb 14, 2013. How are you and your boy doing? And the colors are sky blue and white. And how is that puppy of yours? Take care.
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FallenLilith96 In reply to Leveve [2012-07-22 23:37:17 +0000 UTC]
thats ok i recently got a job, so ive been busy.
hehe sounds busy and painful but it will all be worth it in the end
im over my flu. so im doing better.. just fighting with a lot people lately..
School is going good. ahead of the class.
aww thats awesome valentines day, well i wish you all the best
he isnt doing so well.. we've been fighting coz ive been busy with school and work and he doesnt seem to understand that i cant give him all my time when i have other things i must do..
well it sounds beautiful
My puppy is back to her old self all better now
take care xo
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Leveve In reply to FallenLilith96 [2012-07-30 07:06:23 +0000 UTC]
Well, between the fittings, and finially finding a decent hall and photographer. And plus, me getting a part time job, I've been swamped. I am glad you are feeling better and doing well in school. I am sorry to hear about you and your boy fighting, if he loves you like he say he does, he should be more understanding and supportive. I hope you and him get everything smooth again and I'm glad your puppy is doing well. Take care.
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FallenLilith96 In reply to Leveve [2012-08-04 23:14:59 +0000 UTC]
damn you are busy. well i hope its not stressing you out. im getting the flu again though, it sucks. We were fighting but we figured everything out
hes trying to be more understanding, he's finally understanding that I need time with my family, just like I need time with him. We finally told our friends we were engaged.. the drama it caused. But I think it brought us closer together. He knows im fully committed to this relationship.
Well hope all is well with you and your boy, take care xo <3
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Leveve In reply to FallenLilith96 [2012-08-20 10:14:19 +0000 UTC]
I hope you are getting to the doctor to fight that flu and why would your friends act like that? I remember when Lan (My boy) acted like when I was recovering, I couldn't do anything. Everything is set for the wedding, I'm so excited, I hope everything is well with your family and if you don't mind me asking what is your boy's name? I hope you get well soon. Take care.
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FallenLilith96 In reply to Leveve [2012-08-22 04:13:41 +0000 UTC]
flu is over now its good to breath again
I dont know.. my friends just never approve of the people I associate with. it sucks.. its like they dont care about how I feel.
your boy is very sweet
I wish you all the best with the wedding hope it turns out to be wonderful and beautiful.
My boys name is Anthony. hes a sweetie. even though all my friends hate him I dont care. I love him with everything I have.
hope all is well, look after yourself.
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Leveve In reply to FallenLilith96 [2012-08-22 10:25:44 +0000 UTC]
That is good to hear, does he live in the same country correct, I'm a little confused because Lan is my boy's nick name. It is good to hear that you are doing better. Sorry, I am a bit concerned with a few minor details that need to to be ironed out. Sorry, I guess hearing your boy's name brought up some things. If your friend's are like that then don't listen to them. Hope all is well too. Take care.
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FallenLilith96 In reply to Leveve [2012-08-27 00:05:25 +0000 UTC]
yeah same country but different state.
I understand hope everything goes well. wish you all the best
Oh :/ well im sorry that happened, hope everything is alright.
im starting to ignore my friends and they are going to walk away from me but i dont care i dont need their drama. I have my boy.
look after yourself
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Leveve In reply to FallenLilith96 [2012-08-27 16:48:42 +0000 UTC]
Hey, sorry about that, I got a bit worried, because between you and I Lan's first name is Anthony, he's orginally from New York. I am a bit nervous because he does play WoW and he's away on business, we hit and miss each other. Trust me planning a wedding is not easy. I am glad you are feeling better. Howis school going and how's your job going as well? I am back to working. Finially lol. I hope your family is doing well and that puppy of yours is so cute. She a lab mix? Your friends will hopefully come around. We have our boys. You take care and be safe.
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FallenLilith96 In reply to Leveve [2012-08-28 10:25:23 +0000 UTC]
he cheated on me.. i found the proof.. the texts.. the pics.. im sorry.. im heartbroken .. im sorry i might not talk for awhile..
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Leveve In reply to FallenLilith96 [2012-08-30 02:57:50 +0000 UTC]
I am sorry to hear that. Take your time and get bettr. I am here if you need someone to talk to. Take Care -hugs-
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FallenLilith96 In reply to Leveve [2012-08-30 10:09:29 +0000 UTC]
Thanks .. its really hard.. he denies it then i have someone telling me he is cheating and i dont know what to believe and its hurting
*hugs* thanks I appreciate it
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Leveve In reply to FallenLilith96 [2012-09-01 13:19:38 +0000 UTC]
The best advice I can give is, if the person has your best interest in heart and the proof is there.. Remember, there are better ones out there. One's that will treat you like a quuen and not cheat. Of course he'll deny it but then you got to remember if it was not true. If this person had proof and came to you with it how can it be false. I understand, I went through the exact same thing before I met Lan. -Hugs- Just hold in there. And remember I am here if you need any advice or need a ear. -hugs- take care.
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FallenLilith96 In reply to Leveve [2012-09-03 01:58:43 +0000 UTC]
It isnt the first time hes cheated on me. I cheated on him about 2 years ago. Then he cheated on me a few months after that. Its been a rough ride so I do believe he could do it. But youre right there are better ones out there. we dont trust each other i think its better if we split. theres to much drama between us. plus all my friends hate him and he hates me being with them :/ its just to much for me
I appreciate that youre here means a lot *hugs*
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Leveve In reply to FallenLilith96 [2012-09-04 03:29:39 +0000 UTC]
I hope you are doing alright. I've been working and if he is causing you that much stress. Then it is beest that you leave him. Do it for yourself though and no one else. If he can't accept you spending time with your friends then hey his lose and someone else's gain. You will find a better one. One that loves you and would never let you go. You don't need that kind of stress nor drama. Remember, I am here if you need any advice. Take care -hugs-
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FallenLilith96 In reply to Leveve [2012-09-06 03:56:27 +0000 UTC]
im doing better, been hanging out with friends, just trying to forget about it all. I dont think me and him were meant to be together forever. i think its better this way. and ill find someone better. i dont need his drama, ill start feeling better now. I am glad you are here means a lot. *hugs*
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Leveve In reply to FallenLilith96 [2012-09-07 12:31:55 +0000 UTC]
Thats good. I'm happy to hear that you are doing better. And you know that your friends will always be there for you. If he is that bad then finding someone better is the way to go. And your right, you don't need his drama. Sounds to me like he's immature anyways. I am doing ok. Work has been crazy this week. As always, I am here for you. *hugs* Take care.
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FallenLilith96 In reply to Leveve [2012-09-08 10:48:11 +0000 UTC]
staying at a mates place tonight
my friends are everything to me right now. im so glad they are here for me.
i will find someone better in time, i know i will. i dont want drama anymore.. i dont want to argue or fight. i want someone who will trust em and someone i can trust. well youre doing good I just finished work, so tired and drained but gunna be playing video games with my friends. *hugs* <3
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Leveve In reply to FallenLilith96 [2012-10-07 17:38:45 +0000 UTC]
Hello, Just wanted to see how you are doing. I'm doing ok, me and my guy are looking for a new apartment.I hope you are doing well. I have been busy at work. How is school and work going for you? How's that puppy of yours? As always I'm here if you need someone to talk to. Take Care -hugs-
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FallenLilith96 In reply to Leveve [2012-10-08 00:47:13 +0000 UTC]
well good luck with finding a place I know it isnt easy. I finished school
Im so happy, I passed everything. I have been sick so havent been working much. My little girl is doing well
thanks for asking, I appreciate you being here. I am actually doing good. Been hanging around my close friends and they have been making me feel better. im glad everything is going well for you. how long til the big day? *hugs*
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Leveve In reply to FallenLilith96 [2012-10-22 04:36:39 +0000 UTC]
Hello,
Sorry I haven't relied. Been busy at work. How has your life been without that cheat being in your life? I'm sorry that you've been sick. I have been too. The big day is on hold. Glad your puppy is doing good. I'm going to go get more sleep take care. -hugs-
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FallenLilith96 In reply to Leveve [2012-10-23 05:31:32 +0000 UTC]
hey
im with someone now. an old friend of mine
im so happy. ah thats no good
hope you get to get married soon. I bet you are so happy.
hope you'll be ok. Take care *hugs*
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Leveve In reply to FallenLilith96 [2012-10-26 07:57:35 +0000 UTC]
Hey,
Sorry I haven't been on. Work is killing me. Congrats about finishing school. I am happy for you. Who is this friend if you don't mind me asking? We are working on it, slowly but surely. It's still set we just got to work on it. It just takes him. I'm off to bed. Remember I'm here for you. -hugs-
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FallenLilith96 In reply to Leveve [2012-10-27 09:46:02 +0000 UTC]
thats ok i have a lot of stuff going on for the next two months. i wont be on much. hope work will be okay.
im glad i wont be going back to school, so glad to be out and done ^.^ no more homework.
his name is Tony. I've known him for 5 years. we've been good through, been in and out of contact. the past 8 months we've been talking lots and we finally got together about a week ago Im happy.
well as long as it happens one day im sure you both will be able to get through it. i know it takes work and time. and you two seem perfect for each other so the wait is worth it
And I am here for you *hugs*
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Leveve In reply to FallenLilith96 [2012-10-29 06:04:00 +0000 UTC]
Hello, I'm not doing so well been in and out of the hospital. Please tell me that tony is not short for anthony. Because that's what some of Lan's friend's call him because his middle name is Anthony. Him and I are still working on it. With my health turning like this he's been going crazy. I hope it is not the same guy that cheated on you. Please let it be an different guy. I don't want to see you go through anymore stress or drama. I am glad you are doing well. I need to go to bed. I got blood test in the morning and remember. I'm here for you. -hugs-
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