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"You know,... look, I didn't think anything of those computer dating sites. I thought they were just places to look to hook up." David squirmed. His hands were sweaty on the wheel. Oh my god, he thought. Did I put on too much cologne? Don't screw up. Don't screw up.  "I mean, I want to start this on an honest basis and I sort of... well, I actually was looking for..."

"A booty call?" Stephanie laughed. "Come on, you spent three months getting up the courage to ask me out. Not that I hadn't dropped a few hints that I wanted you to ask."

"Yeah, I suppose the restaurant coupons you kept suggesting as a "friend" should have been a tip off." David felt his confidence growing. "Still, I mean, under hobbies I put Star Trek. What would make a woman like you even think..."

"You're cute," she said. She leaned over and kissed him on the cheek. This wasn't David's first date, but his date for the evening was, by any man's standards, HOT!

Fortunately it was Autumn and the sun had dropped. He would have turned two shades redder if she could have seen his face. His face would have been redder still if she had noticed that he had discreetly pulled the edge of his jacket across his lap. His hands were slick on the wheel.

"Um, I , I have something to do before, um dinner." The kiss had totally thrown David off. He had dated. Got lucky a few times, but this was unprecedented. In reality, she had asked him out. He made a good living though he wasn't rich. He drove a nice car, but nothing special. She knew that. He tried not to think about it. No matter how the date ended, at this point tomorrow's shower would be enjoyable.

"What are we doing here? Why are we pulling in here?"

"Here", as she had asked was, "Here"; The Meadow Brooks Convalescent Home and Independent Living Centre. David pulled his Charger in front of a small bungalow. "What  are we doing here," she repeated.

"I am so sorry I didn't tell you. I should have told you. I uh, I should have, I... I just want to be upfront with you. I'm sorry, I just have to do this. This will only take half an hour. Max."

David was a realistic man. He was handsome, maybe a tad too tall and lean, but good looking. His love of SciFi conventions and the occasional Firefly marathon with friends had done little to aid his confidence with the fairer sex. He knew that he was less than suave.

The cottage they had come to was one of those that had been fashionable in the last century. Early in the last century. An elderly woman sat on the front step. Her long white hair, becoming yellow with age, was pulled up in a loose bun. As the car slowed in front of her cottage, her rheumy eyes came alive. "David" she shrilled in her old lady voice.

"Hello, Mrs. Patterson", David called as he helped Stephanie from the car and guided her up the narrow concrete walk. Insects buzzed around the naked yellow bulb hung under the porch roof.

"David! My David. Come in. I've made you your favourite. Sweet ginger tea." With difficulty she stood and held the door for the young couple.

"Thank you Mrs. Patterson. This is Stephanie. She's my um... friend," David stammered.

Mrs. Patterson took Stephanie and gave her a bony hug. "I am so glad that my  Davie has finally found someone. I told him I didn't want to die before I was a great-grandma. And such a pretty girl too."

"I... um , I, we're not, I mean, we just met and...," Stephanie stammered, her cheeks glowed red hot.

David took her gently by the arm. "Don't worry about Mrs. Patterson. She thinks I'm her grandson. He was killed in the war," David said in a soft, but intentionally overheard voice. "We're members of the same Church. I come to check on her. I worry about her."

"But David! The photos!" Mrs. Patterson's hand fluttered before an array of gilt framed photos carefully arranged on a sideboard. Her hands caressed each framed picture carefully. Blue veins showed clearly through transparent skin. The photos showed David and Mrs. Patterson together in several scenes. Through several years.

"Yes, Mrs. Patterson. We discussed this. I had those photo shopped. Made up. Remember? When you said I reminded you of your grandson? You said it would make his death easier to bear?"

Stephanie was nearly in tears as she watched this. She knew David had to be strong to do this. She couldn't imagine the commitment he must have had to aid this woman.

"David, why do you say such horrible things? I remember when you were born. I remember when, you..."

"Mrs. Patterson, please. Don't get yourself worked up. It's time for your meds and bed." He picked up a tiny, pleated paper cup off the TV stand and offered her a glass of dead, tepid water. She gulped down the too familiar green and blue pills. "Off to bed with you." He gathered her weak form in his arms.

"David," she protested weakly, "I can walk. Put me down. You are so mean, teasing your Grandma the way you do."

"Yes, Mrs. Patterson."

"David! Stop that. At least call me 'Grandma' while your fiancé is here."

"Okay... Grandma."

"See, was that so hard?"

"No, Grandma. I guess not."  He blushed.

He gently settled her into her bed. After removing a few of the pillows that old women seem to collect, he carefully tucked the ruffled comforter under her chin. He turned off the bedside light and walked out of the door.

As he pulled the door shut, he heard a voice as soft as the coo of a dove. "David?"

David sighed softly. His chin fell to his chest. "Yes, Mrs... Um... Grandma."

"I love you."

"I love you too. Grandma."

David walked into the living room to find Stephanie waiting for him, her eyes filled with tears. "David, that was the most, that was, you are..."

"Save it," he said brusquely. He pushed past her and pushed open the screen door. It slammed as he walked to the car. Stephanie stared uncomprehending. She closed the front door behind her and slowly walked to the curb. He pushed the door open from his side.

They drove in silence for a long while. Finally she spoke. "David, I don't know what's bothering you, but that was the sweetest..."

"You don't understand." His words were tense. His tone hard.

"But David, what you did was so...," her words trailed off.

"She is my grandmother," he said softly. "My mother's maiden name. Mrs. Patterson."

"But..."

"Yeah, I like to screw with her." A cruel grin spread across his lips. Stephanie couldn't see it in the waning light.

She turned to him. Even in the gloaming, he could see her eyes were wide with astonishment. He wondered. Was there a touch of hatred? Loathing?

"You. You...," she spluttered trying to find the words. "You're a MONSTER," she screamed.

David shrank in his seat, a deflated shell. They drove on in frigid silence. He managed to sneak a look at her. Her eyes were narrowed. Her arms crossed tightly across her chest. Though not for a lack of trying, he failed to make himself smaller.

Finally she spoke. Her voice colder than ice. "How could you?"

"I...I...,"

"You could have had the decency to tell me."

"I'm sorry."

"Well, I suppose I can forgive you." Her voice softened only slightly.

A hopeful sigh quietly escaped David's lips. They continued again in silence.

"David?"

"Yes."

"Can we kill her?"

David raised his eyes Heavenward. "Thank you eHarmony.com," he said.