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[Conference Room]

England: Alright, everyone. Today's agenda… is the G8. Basically, we're talking about us.

(Opening)

England: So first of all, I'd like to share with you how I really feel about all of this. Glare. I don't think there necessarily needs to be eight of us. Seven is enough.

Russia: Why do you look at me when you say that?

Belarus: Ohhh very irritated!

England: Ah!!

Russia: Mmmm… nomnomnom… I believe eight is definitely enough. What do you all think? Nomnom…

Canada: Oh, I agree! At least I think I do, but I don't know. Maybe I should think about it! Just, come back to me.

Kumajiro: I'm hungry! Give me some food!
(Canada: I want to hear what everyone else says about it first.)
(Belarus: ACHOO!)

Canada: Hetalia!

France: My turn. Why don't we add someone? Of course first on my short list is Spain, naturally.

Spain: Spelune!

[Spelune]

America: Dude, no way! That guy is lazy, has a lisp, and is always screwing around with me.

Germany: Yes, I definitely agree with you. This time.

France: Eh-!

Germany: Although, we should stay the G8. I've already ordered stationary. Thank you very much, Herr France.

France: What?! "Herr France"?! That's not fair! Just when I thought that we were getting along you have to start agreeing with me?! You bastard! Ghh, are you trying to be Herr Funny German now?! Because it's not! You're not funny! I'm going to start driving American cars if you don't watch yourself!

Japan: Ah! Italy appears to be rather bored with our meeting.

England: At least he's not randomly screaming the name of an American president.

Italy: Hyeahhh…

[Host Country]

Pookie: Nyaah…

Italy: Hetalia!

Finland: Sweden! It's been a while; would you like to have lunch with me?

Sweden: Ja sure.

[With Mr. Sweden]

Finland and Sweden: (Munching away)

Finland: Oh yeah! So guess what happened to me the other day, Mr. Sweden. So tired… remember that time I was forced to go to Mr. Russia's house and I didn't want to go even a little? Apparently, all he wanted was one of my ports. So, I'm back! Nice, right? Ahh… to be honest I liked the way I felt at your house so much more.

Sweden: AAAAH?!

Finland: Uweeeh!
Yeah, I had way more fun with you than I did with him…! It's true! Plus, he's creepy! Aaah, isn't that a crazy story? It felt crazy at the time… so, what's your opinion?

Sweden: Nh… OH!

Finland: Eeeeeeuuuuuuu!!
Why did you have to do that?? I'm fragile!

Sweden: I see.

Sweden's thoughts: I was going to tell him "I wanted a port too," but that's kind of embarrassing.

["Mittagunai" means "embarrassed" in Fukushima dialect]

(Hataffute Parade, zooms in on England)

[Nekotalia]
[If the world was made up of cats…]

Italy-cat: Ve-meow~!

Monaco-cat: According to the data, there are a limited number of tuna cans in our neighborhood association. Hence, it should be forbidden for cats to deal in canned tuna with each other.

[Tuna
Perfect for rice
Soy sauce flavored]

Japan-cat: Ah, excuse me… may I speak, please?

Monaco-cat: You already are, Japan-cat. Continuez.

Japan-cat: The data you have on the canned tuna in this neighborhood is rather dated. It is, in fact, true, I do love canned tuna, but realistically it's not like I want to drive to extinction. At my place, tuna cultivation is not only possible, but a reality. So there's no reason for any of us to go without! So there's this and that, and this and that, and this and that…

Cat: Japan-cat's pretty loud for a cat that likes to refrain from speaking.
(Japan-cat: And blah blah blah blah, this and that, and this and that, and that and this and that)

Cat 2: Yeah, he gets pretty worked up about food.
(Japan-cat: And this and this)

Japan-cat: Meow.

Japan-cat: (Phew) Thank Buddha I was able to stop that ridiculous ban on dealing canned tuna.

Japan: Tama! Time to eat!

Japan-cat: Oh? Is it dinnertime already?

Japan: Today I have a bit of a treat for you… salty tuna sashimi!

Japan-cat: Yes… tuna is good for the soul! Tuna, tuna, delicious tuna… I don't normally like to meow, but at a time like this, I can't help myself!
"I love tuna meow!" Nomnomnom!

Japan: Did he talk?!

[To be continued]

(Credits)

Japan-cat: "I love tuna meow!" Nomnomnom!

Japan: Did he talk?!

Translations
• Should Russia be in the G8: I've mentioned it in a previous episode, but when the G8 (We Have a Lot of Money and Power so Let's Gather and Discuss World Issues Club) first came to be in 1975, it was the G7, as the Soviet Union was excluded because of the whole communism thing. Gorbachev started attending meetings in 1991, and Russia officially joined the G8 in '97.
Anyway, following Russia's involvement in the Russo-Georgian War (in which Russia recognized the independence of South Ossetia and Abkhazia and invaded Georgia as a result), Britain suggested that since Russia didn't want to play by the international rules, he wasn't needed in the G8. In the end, the 6 others joined Britain in condemning Russia's actions, but Russia argued that their claim was biased and wasn't kicked out.
It's worth mentioning that Russia was suspended from G8 activities following the invasion of Crimea in 2014.
• Should Spain join the G8: As mentioned in a later note, when Italy's position in the G8 was called into question, Spain was brought up as a potential alternative. A greater GDP and aid percentage were cited, but is was brought up that there were more appropriate other candidates outside of Europe. Of course, Italy was not booted from the club, so the argument was moot in the end.
• Spelune: I… I don't know. I have no idea. What does this mean. I think it's supposed to just say "Spain" in a really weird accent. Maybe that's how Kansai dialect says Spain. I don't know. Spare me.
• Spain is always screwing with America: Spain and America's relationship is a rocky one. During the American Revolutionary War, Spain supported France (read: France, not America) against Britain, and things seemed peachy, but in general they didn't trust or understand each other. There was a lot of contest over territories in the West, with the general prejudice about each other being "he's a terrible person." 1812 and the Spanish-American War and propaganda and all that. From the 20th century, relations for the most part have been cooperative, although I'm not exactly versed in modern Spanish-US foreign relations or policy.
• France will start driving American cars: If I am reading statistical charts well, French cars have always topped the automobile market in France (at least as far back as 2012), with brands like Peugeot and Renault coming in at a little over 50% of the market. The German company Volkswagen holds the highest share of imported car business, but General Motors and FORD seem to creep up at a combined 1-2% behind. In the original script, France threatens to go back to driving a Peugeot, which is a much more real threat lol.
• Italy seems bored: So in 2009 it was Italy's turn to host the G8 meeting in L'Aquila, and things… didn't go super smoothly. A post by the Guardian claimed that America had to take over formulating an agenda because Italy wasn't handling it at all, stating that he didn't have a clear vision for the summit and if America had ideas he would happily listen to them. Apparently it got to the point where the others considered just kicking Italy out of the G8. Italy understandably argued that the Guardian was spouting nonsense.
• Shouting the name of a US president: At a photo-op at the end of a G20 meeting that April, Italy's PR Berlusconi greeted President Obama quite loudly, which frustrated Queen Elizabeth II and sparked some international headlines.
• Russia wants a port: Finland and Russia (and Sweden) have had a history of fighting over the shores of the Gulf of Finland. Helsinki, Tallinn, and St. Petersburg are all on the gulf! Russia was interested in the area because, as always, warm water port. Sweden had control of the land that now makes up Finland for most of the past 1000 years, but Russia dragged Finland to his house after the Finnish War in the early 19th century.
• Sweden wants a port: Sweden you have plenty of ports calm down. The original line is that he wanted to say he also had fun when Finland lived with him.
• Fukushima dialect: In Japanese, Sweden speaks with a Fukushima dialect, which is a branch of the wider Tohoku dialect family. It's stereotyped as being very difficult to understand and more of a rural dialect, which is why Sweden is characterized in English as mumbling.
• Continuez: Go on (French)
• Too much canned tuna: The anime cites this as a spoof of Japan's reluctance to follow international fishing restrictions. Overfishing concerns and conservation projects are often in direct opposition to Japan's fishing culture and economy, especially in traditional fishing villages, says Japan. Japan also eats way more fish than any other nation, according to various studies. Recently, the debate has moved to whether catching bluefin tuna should be banned. Japan eats a lot of tuna, so they are attempting to find less restrictive ways to preserve the population. Aquaculture is one possibility; there are bluefish tuna farms in Japan!