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Chibitalia: Meow!

HRE: Ah…! Italy, what are you trying to do back there?

Chibitalia: Meow! Pretending I’m a kitty! Meow meow! Meow!

HRE: Oh, that’s right… during the Cat Festival, we’re all supposed to go around acting like we’re pussy cats!

(HRE: Ah…!! Ah… Ah…)
Chibitalia: (laugh) Meow! Meow!

HRE: Meow!
Chibitalia: Meow!
HRE: Meow! Hahaha…
Chibitalia: Meow!
HRE: Meow!
Chibitalia: Meow-!! .....eh...

HRE: Ah...! Ah... ah... ah..ah...

Chibitalia: Uwaaaa….!

(Opening)

Japan’s narration: こんにちわ. (Konnichiwa) Today, you are going to meet my new friend—Greece. And yes; that is cat on his head.

Greece: Nh… Japan. I’m glad you came. Check this out.

Cat: Meow!

Greece: I found something interesting and I wanted you to be the first to see it. It’s cool. Just like you.

Japan: It’s amazing! They said you had discovered ruins, but I had no idea…!

Greece: Yeah. I didn’t either. I found this stone bench thing I can sleep on whenever I want.

Japan: Ah… is this not ancient remnants of your mother’s city?

Greece: Mhm… and you can sleep right next to me.

Japan: Ahh… hah… excellent joke. You got me. For second I thought you were serious—wha..!

Greece: Zzzzzzzzzz…
(Cat: Meow!)

Japan: Poor Mr. Greece… at least your cat loves you...
Hn…

Greece: Hetalia.

Cats: Meow! Meow!

Japan’s narration: Mr. Greece has a thing for cats.

Greece: I love cats. Is there something wrong with that?

Japan: No… they are irresistible…

Cat: Meow!

Japan: This one, here. What name did you give to him?

Greece: ….mm…

Cats: Meow! Meow!

Greece: His name… is Larry…?

Japan: I think that you just made this up on spot.

Greece: Hetalia.

Greece: Mn… I wanted you to feel at home. So guess what I did. Give up? I learned some fancy Japanese.

Japan: That very impressive! Would you mind showing to me some of the words you have learned?

Greece: Um… sushi, pocki, the Dragonball Z, and 何. (Nani)

Japan: Ok…? Is there anything else?

Greece: Sure. Me rikey you vely muchu but me rikey the cats moru.

Japan: I am not sure you learned that phrase correctly.

Greece: I hope I didn’t offend you. But cats are so super.

Japan: What?! I guess you really did know what you were saying…

Greece: Hetalia.

Greece: Behold! The guy with the crazy eyes is Zeus. He was king of the gods.

Japan: Yes, I know. Even I am familiar with this great man. His wife was extremely insane.

Greece: Yeah. Zeus was pretty much like a typical Greek man. ‘Cause he had a bunch of lovers, and really didn’t care who knew about it.

Imaginary Greek Lady: Ooooooh! (giggle)

Imaginary Zeus: Hoohoohoohoohoo!

Greece: This was a problem because his wife was the jealous type. Every time she caught him with one of his lovers, she would destroy parts of humanity.

Imaginary Hera: (scream)

Greece: And she’d scream.

Japan: Your Greek gods act the same as we regular people. That must be the reason I enjoy learning about them so much.

[World Heritage]

Greece: Nn… they’re cool. Eh. But every time I read about them, I always end up crying ‘til I faint. So depressing.
All of our stories end up in bloodshed and violence.

Japan: Hey, why you had to spoil ending for me, Greece?!

(Marukaite Chikyuu: Japan)

Translations
• Cat Festival: In Ypres, Belgium, an annual Kattenstoet (Cat Festival) is held. It commemorates Baudoin II, the Count of Flanders’s conversion to Christianity. They killed cats because they’re associated with witches and paganism. The notes that came with my DVD says that Holy Rome bursts into flames because cats were sometimes also burnt. Cats are no longer killed in these festivals, of course, and there’s a parade instead. The next one takes place May 10 this year. The official kattenstoet website says that it ends with the burning of the witch.
• Ancient Ruins: Ancient Greece has left plenty of remains from her home, of course, and many of her buildings influence ones of other nations, such as the Coliseum, and America’s Treasury Building. The reason half of the buildings in Washington D.C. look Greek is that much of it had to be rebuilt during the Greek Revival period (1818-1850) after the British burnt the capital down in the War of 1812. Anyway, I checked around, and based on the size of it, the levels, and the amount of pillars, the closest match to the ruins I could find is in Cyrene, Libya. So Greece and Japan may not have even been in Greece. It would explain why it took him so long to find it. A few other possible locations are Valley of the Temples, Apamea, and Laodikeia.
• Cats: The conditions for stray cats in Greece are actually really bad. Pet cats typically roam free, and they aren’t spayed/neutered, so a lot of kittens are abandoned. The sad truth is that up until recently, these cats were treated very horribly, as vermin, even, and would often be killed on sight. After joining the EU, Greece has been pressured to step up his game in the animal rights world.
• 何: What (Japanese)
• Zeus and Hera: Ok, so like, Zeus, god of the sky and king of the gods, married Hera, who was also his sister, goddess of marriage and childbirth. She actually only married him to hide the fact that he raped her, so yikes. Hera was always jealous of her husband’s lovers, despite not liking her husband very much. Some of her revenge plots involve sending a giant stinging insect for Io and trying to convince Artemis that Callisto was a bear. By the way, the statue in the background is of Athena, goddess of reason, intelligence, arts, and literature.