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HyperactiveMothMan — 63. Do Not Disturb
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Published: 2009-06-20 22:01:22 +0000 UTC; Views: 1200; Favourites: 3; Downloads: 1
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Well I'm gonna put this under the slightly mature rating cuz in all honesty, it is sort of in that category.I noticed that I've drawn just about every one of my characters and then some torturing Neshae except for the one who does the most. I figured it was time to change that. These two found a dungeon underneath their castle and decided not to waste it. XD
Jomeiah has a bit of a dominatrix side (tickle fetish that ya'll already know about, etc). Neshae does not, but he does like the sex. So the two reach a compromise and Jomeiah won't use the whips and other painful devices and Neshae will withstand the non harmful ones such as feathers. That's what she's got him wrapped up in by the way. XD
Although I love how Neshae turned out in this one, I'm kind of disappointed with Jomeiah. I need to practice the side view of limbed beings more... Would have just drawn her at 3/4 view like normal but they're sort of rubbing noses so that would be difficult to pull off without obscuring most of Jomeiah's face.
For more 100 Theme Challenge:
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EDIT: Well I decided to change this one. I mean, I loved the pic I just hated how Jomeiah turned out and then I started drawing Neshae's wings differently so I figured I'd just update this one.
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Comments: 41
Hmm, I saw your reasoning, but it still isn't truly Mature...
Anyway, let's start off with something I learned just today on the airplane while...drawing Neshae! Yes, in a single drawing of Neshae, I discovered an amazing technique which I shall now incorporate into all of my drawings as best as possible. I may send you the picture later, but anyway...
PERSONALITY. It's more than just the face. You need to show people's personalities through their body stance too. If Jomeiah's dominatrix (dunno what that is, though I certainly have a grasp of the meaning), show it! Instead of standing there with her back all straight, have her bend forward a little to show she's in charge. Instead of just smiling, give her a wicked-yet-prankster grin. Sneering eyes, mischievous grin... Bend her forward. Then she will have the look of "I'm gonna do terrible things to ya, punk, and there's nothing you can do about it."
Neshae should push the middle of his torso out a little to show he's not afraid of a little "fun." It's like she's bending down to show her dominance, but he's not intimidated one bit and is willing to show off his own status. But we all know Neshae's kind of laid-back too, so have him relax his wings a little. He knows nothing bad is really going to happen; it's all fun. No need for his wings to be all stiff against the wall like that. Makes him look like a coward. One eyebrow should be raised too, to show he's mocking the "threat;" "Oh, is little Jomeiah gonna make me cry?"
Genius, isn't it? e.deviantart.net/emoticons/b/b… " width="15" height="15" alt="
Anyway, that's technique. But the art isn't just about the symbolism; it's about cold hard skill. You're right in thinking odd about Jomeiah's head. Right now, she looks like a Neanderthal. Or worse, a fictional caveman. It isn't her dress; it's her face. She's got a very primitive-looking skull going on right now. A good thing to remember is that when modern day people smile, they don't just their lower jaw out, which is what it looks like she's doing here. The lower jaw is almost always a little closer to the neck than the upper jaw. Also, the upper jaw points wherever the head points; so if Jomeiah's face is facing Neshae, her upper jaw shouldn't be pointing at his chest like it is in this picture. The lower jaw is a separate bone, but the upper jaw is one with the rest of the skull. And the skull is not flexible. I'd also bash you for the nose's location, but the nose's location in relation with eye level is often based on one's own personal style (compare Disney to Japanese comics, for example). However, the jaws and stuff below the nose shouldn't be farther out than her forehead; think "edge of an oval," not "diagonal line" when considering the edge of a face in portfolio view.
I can smile and say that apart from points already mentioned about him, there's nothing to improve on Neshae except for increasing the accuracy of the shadows. I don't think you're quite grasping how he'd look in three-dimensional space; the shadows are very 2D in nature and don't seem natural. For example, if the fire is on his left, there should be a shadow on the rim of his nose but not the whole end of it.
Sorry about the low Impact score, but I just didn't feel what you seem to be trying to have we viewers feel. Is this a romantic moment? Or is it a dark and frightening experience? The mood isn't clear, and your description didn't help much to correct that issue. I don't know what I'm supposed to walk away with after seeing this picture. The picture's vagueness was your weakspot in this picture, which otherwise is a vast improvement since the last critique I wrote for you.
So in summary, try to show the characters' personalities in their posture instead of just their face, enlighten yourself on the position of the mouth on the human skull, get a better feel of how a 3D or 4D Neshae would look in different lightings, and try to give your audience a reason to be interested in this picture.
And as a side note, the area where Neshae's wings merge with his torso is dead sexy. XP
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Dead sexy, huh? XD
Well thanks for your tips on improving on limbed people. That's the whole reason I requested critique in the first place. XD
However I gotta disagree with you on some of the things you said about Neshae.
For one, his belly's about as far out as it can go. He's just about bolted to the wall so any further would hurt his wings. This is also why his wings look stiff. Not a whole lot of room to move. There may be only one shackle on each one, but they're enough to limit movement.
As for the expression, that's a pretty good idea. Wasn't really thinking about that one. He's just anticipating what he's gonna get after this. XD
Thanks for the critique.
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Very welcome.
Wings have more than one joint; don't forget, they are a full upper arm, lower arm, and hand. So he should still be able to bend them. Also, the stretchy skin should be elastic, so his torso should be able to curve at least a little.
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But it is curved. o_0 Not a whole lot, I'll admit, but it is.
Though in reality Neshae's not really caring about showing his lack of intimidation. XD He's just letting Jomeiah do what she wants so he'll get what he wants. XD
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Speaking of wants... CHAPTER! D8 And... GRAHAM AND SOPHIA PIC! D8 Why you no do yet, girl of little?
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Girl of little? -_-
I've been thinking about the next chapter since you posted yours, but I'm just not sure what to have in it. Neshae is kind of stuck in the same spot until Dreyfus wakes up unless he wanders off and gets in trouble. HMM doesn't show up until they reach Neshae's house. And as far as I know Bilbo doesn't run into them again until after HMM does.
So if you have any ideas let me know. 
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Very easy: first of all, you don't have to write about the sleep scene. Not only is Neshae at the moment being requested to tell his history, which may fill a few paragraphs of conversation, but a major inaccuracy in our original story was battle methods. Considering Dreyfus is non-violent and does not practice battle techniques, the idea that he could stand in battle for long at all is inconceivable. Hence, he'll have to be trained. And who better to do that than Neshae? "Enemies" exist in Rayman's world, so that's a good enough excuse for Dreyfus to learn how to protect himself. Of course, that would be after sleeping. 
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Heh. There are worse ways to die. XD
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Its a torturous way to go with a feather wrapped around your waste and being tickled like that
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There are much much worse ways to die. Ever watch the show "1000 ways to die" or read the Darwin awards? XD
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Oh yeah I know of it. Messed up show hope its cancelled
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I love that show. The extent of human stupidity. XD it never ceases to amaze me.
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Yeah nice to know 1000 ways you can kill yourself!
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More of a watch the stupid people and don't make the same mistakes.
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It's a messed up and pointless gay ass show
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You must really hate the Darwin awards. XD
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No (I was in a depressed mood when I sent that) but you wanna no what I do hate? Disney Pixar.
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Lol why do you hate them? XD they make decent movies that don't require you to be prepubescent to enjoy.
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Their target audience is little girls! What about the boys? Back then the target was the attention of the entire family. No it's just girls. I'm at the mall with my cousins and the Disney store that's always there is now filled with pink and frozen stuff! Nothing for the boys! Just a small section of Star Wars since Disney bought it. THEY ARE SEXIST!!! Dreamworksend does a whole lot better. Good movies for everyone. They are getting more dramatic and serious. How to train your dragon 2 was their turning point. They don't go for one target audience. They go for everyone. What Disney USED to do
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Yes Frozen is a chick flick but Pixar has done plenty of other stuff. Frozen is just what's popular. But I see where you're coming from. I'm tired of seeing Frozen merchandise at work myself. XD
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Most of them are!!!
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OK I finally got the viruses off of my tablet laptop. So I can finally work on that comic you wanted. If I remember correctly you wanted a comic involving Marjahsi tickling you right?
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Yup! Licking, fingernails kisses and all!
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Hmm ... cool your character I liked vampires
you'd be fine with my Darky
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Hehe Thanks
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but not understood or is it called? You know I do not understand much Italian and English.....
You msn?
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Sorry I didn't quite understand that either. ^_^u
I don't really msn very much. I only have internet when I'm at my parents' house or on Padre Island with my grandparents.
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a or understood!how are old?
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Um...if you are asking how old I am, I'm 22.
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I'm 13 che diferenza
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the vampire like the sexual games he he he
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Good way to have fun sometimes. XD
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Just a little. XD Thanks for the fave.
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XD
your most welcome
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