HOME | DD
infallible — Altered Perspective
Published: 2003-05-30 14:30:45 +0000 UTC; Views: 1552; Favourites: 15; Downloads: 177
Redirect to original
Description
Fearing a tumour growing withinYou go for a test to be clear
The results say “positive” and you realise
You’ve got three months short of a year
You go home and tell your loved one
Your family, friends and so on
Their reactions are tearful or simply shocked
And overflowing with emotion
A discovery that changes your life
And leaves your insides reeling
It’s hard to think straight or figure out
Exactly how you are feeling
A growth inside that feeds off of you
And causes imbalance inside
And on the outside it starts to show
Symptoms you can no longer hide
You go to groups to get you through
And help to ease the pain
And you’ll meet many others there
Who are going through the same
And then, one idle evening
Much earlier than forecast
You realise the time has come
And it’s nearly over at last
On a bed of wheels and metal
Speeding through the halls
They say “We’ll have to cut you open”
Then a cold, drugged darkness falls
The life support machine’s long drone
Brings you back to this world
Signals the exit from this life
Of your new born baby girl
Related content
Comments: 41
Nicely written. This has a tone to it that seems vague at some points--and then very clear at the end. I enjoyed that, and the ending ties up the poem very smoothly.
I think you made a typo here:
Who are going through others the same
I am not sure, but I think that others shouldn't be in there. Anyways, the poem is great, and I enjoyed it a lot. Keep it up 
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
Thank you for the kind comment, and mega-gratitude for the 
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
isnt it ironic how such bad things can bring such good things. nature is very odd. i think it was dropped on its head as a child 
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
LOL.
Thanks for the comment!
👍: 0 ⏩: 0
Good piece. But I can't say I was surprised. Perhaps I've read so many of your works that I can see you coming from a mile away. The three month short of a year part gave you away since it was right after the testing part. But it was still good. I didn't think cancer, but towards the end wear the cuting and sleep and early birth stuff showed up, the possibility of death due to complications did flash for a moment. Great stuff.
Nick
👍: 0 ⏩: 0
good job. although the baby was my first guess.. maybe im smart! haha.. no
eyeehmyew is a dick!
👍: 0 ⏩: 0
Bravo! What a loop in which to be thrown. Never heard a baby referred to as a tumor, but it works in the end. Very nice work.
xTheRavenx
👍: 0 ⏩: 0
Wow. That's incredible. It makes you wonder about everything. Damn mortality ...
👍: 0 ⏩: 0
this is reeally great! hmmmm... i can't quite order my thoughts yet... er, the twist is really, good after you developed the part about a cancer really well. i'm not sure if i'm reliefed that it's a baby... a really good piece though
👍: 0 ⏩: 0
This is very powerful, I was about to cry. I'm not joking, it doesn't take much to make me cry. Yes, I'm a freaking girly man bitch. Shut up. Anyway, this is really wonderful work. I have to check your gallery out now!
👍: 0 ⏩: 0
Very, very nice twist. Definitely deserving of every one of the sixteen bazillion views it's had! It's also very good at building emotion without coming off as pretentious as a lot of writing with a doomie (doomy?) tone tends to.
👍: 0 ⏩: 0
oh my good lord... that is an instant +fav no doubt!
i got about a 5 minute episode of the chills after reading that... im assuming that indeed the child passed, the afterthought this poem thrusts into the readers mind is so impactful... flawlessly executed!
👍: 0 ⏩: 0
very cheeky.. i thought the character was sick or something.. i love it!
👍: 0 ⏩: 0
i dont like it much... its fairly decent imagery and everything, could ve better. the rhyming and flow seems sort of choppy. and the wording seems too bland. good idea and everything, if you work on it a lot more and fix it up a bit, then it could be a lot better.
👍: 0 ⏩: 0
worthy of the DP
congrats. brought back some memories...
👍: 0 ⏩: 0
FAGGS!!!!!!! you all suck my middle nipple!!!!,,,,, poetry sucks
👍: 0 ⏩: 0
Clever. cleverer than me (who just had to use a made up word due to shite vocabulary)...
Intense and emotive too. Keep up the coolness.
👍: 0 ⏩: 0
wow, it was like cancer, cancer, cancer, BABY!! kind of snuck up on you. I like it.
👍: 0 ⏩: 0
LoL, this whole time I thought someone was going to die. That is awesome. +fav
👍: 0 ⏩: 0
Like girl said. A little more work on the wording.
This poem was great, shows even a simple day-tday event can be twisted and shown in a different light-to produce startling greatness.
Infallible, you rock.
👍: 0 ⏩: 0
fuck you.
awesome poem. i thought that it would definitely be cancer or something... then pow! pregnancy! aah!
sneaky bastard. great show.
👍: 0 ⏩: 0
This is really amazing... like everyone else said: quite an awesome twist at the end... had me freaked out for a bit...
Though I never really thought about it until scazrelet mentioned it, but could the baby be dead? Hmm..
👍: 0 ⏩: 0
Very nice poem, I like it alot. Like everyone else, I like the twist ending. Could use some cleaning, but thats no big deal. The ending seemed kinda sad though. Is the child dead? Very unusual...
👍: 0 ⏩: 0
good poem. reminds me of O. Henry work. I think that dude above me is just jealous.....
👍: 0 ⏩: 0
This is one of the worst poems I have ever wasted my time on.
Create some image.
Make me feel.
Spark my brain with a smooth flow.
This was choppy and had no flow.
The rhyme was terrible.
Should I continue?
Not today.
👍: 0 ⏩: 0
Haha.. i was so releived at the last line!
I thought this person was going to die or something.. very VERY creative, great work.
👍: 0 ⏩: 0
Absolutely amazing. Wonderful twist, and very well done!!
Beautiful writing.
👍: 0 ⏩: 0
Fantastic! I'd like to say more but I....... Fantastic!
Did I say that already???? *shrugs*
Shiny like Sunshine,
Valar.
👍: 0 ⏩: 0
Sneaky bastard indeed!!!!!!! That sent me for a loop....awesome...absolutely awesome. I think I need to add this just for the ending...I loved this.
👍: 0 ⏩: 0
You sneaky bastard.
Very cute, very creative. Could use a little work on the flow here and there, but still, quite good.
👍: 0 ⏩: 0
AAA mazing!
i LOVE this! i didnt guess it at all.
i think this is possibly your best piece ever
have a deffinate fav!!!
👍: 0 ⏩: 0
haha I love it! I should have guessed... 3 months off a year
"Fearing a tumour growing within
You go for a test to be clear
The results say “positive” and you realise
You’ve got three months short of a year"
I love it... have a fav!
Post this in DY!
👍: 0 ⏩: 0