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joe-wright — The Operative
Published: 2012-07-31 14:00:31 +0000 UTC; Views: 412; Favourites: 2; Downloads: 5
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Description
Generations ago, humanity was close to unifying in order to mine the planets and build a sphere around the sun. Limitless clean energy. The Global Resource Conglomerate didn't like it, so they set to work.They were the people behind the government. They engineered a series of crippling bad decisions and dismantled key economies in order to assert control.
Now they employ operatives to maintain their new status quo.
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The apostates destroyed the Holy Island causeway, so I row. My breather mask feeds me optigen to augment my performance. The crossing doesn't take long. I drag the little boat onto the shore. My lenses whirr as I zoom in on the village. People are scurrying away, locking their doors. I head for the castle on the hill. I'm not a zealot. I just work for the winning side.
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Streams of flame rush down the halls. The monks flee and tumble from the windows ablaze. Some of them have procured guns somehow, but it doesn't matter. The bullets loop around the approaching operative like flies. Under the shadowy hood, his little round lenses reflect the fire.
In the basement he finds a printing press surrounded by stacks of bibles. Wordlessly, he produces an explosive charge and primes it.
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Comments: 9
Well I'd call this one a hat trick
Sorry I missed when you were putting these out, but then I got to read them all at once! Awesome job, I do love reading them. Shorts like these are truly gems, with all the extraneous pared away; they very nearly count as poetry.
I saw one commenter complain about short sentences making some pieces seem choppy: not sure that's valid. In some cases it would 'smooth' things out to combine a few, but you also use short sentences for emphasis (which I think the commenter missed).
Just occurred to me who your writing reminds me of: Kage Baker, a bit. Not a well-known author but I do like her work.
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I love writing short stories for exactly that reason, they feel so much purer just because they're so condensed.
The older I get the more short sentences I use. I used to write in a very florid manner, but looking back it's kind of embarrassing. Ideally I want to write something clever in a simple way, rather than writing something simple in a clever way. Still, it depends on your style.
I'll look up Kage Baker, thanks!
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I read back over my writing, and if it feels choppy, sometimes combining sentences can help. We 'build' stories, not write them, in my view, and the blocks take whatever shapes we need. So, sometimes short ones fill gaps, sometimes long ones bridge gaps.
I think you'd like Kage Baker. Try Anvil of the World, if you like it, then the Company books might interest you. Unfortunately she died this past year, so no more quirky fantasy from her.
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You're absolutely right, that's a useful way to look at it.
I've ordered Anvil, it's good to have new things to read
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Interesting setting. I like how you combined cyberpunk dystopia and the dark ages. There's a lot of potential for more stories here.
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Thanks, yeah! It's a depressing scenario to think about though 
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I enjoyed it! Favorite part--->I'm not a zealot. I just work for the winning side.
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Thanks! It's so awesome how you've been managing to read and comment on so much, it takes so much effort and you always have something helpful and nice to say
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You're welcome and I'm glad!
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