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Description
        Somehow while he was sleeping, he kicked his dog off the bed. Normally he didn't have the force of a viking whilst kicking in his sleep, but the large *thump* of his dog hitting the ground woke him up. "Aw fuck, sorry," he said to his dog even though he couldn't understand words. It was storming abnormally hard at the time, so he reached for his phone and checked the weather. It was going to storm all day.
        Since he was up, he switched on his television. There was a commercial on about a spray on hair removal product. He watched as a hairy leg was sprayed with the product, and then whipped with a rag. The hair came off like it does when you bathe in nuclear waste. "Oh great, carcinogens in a bottle," he muttered to himself.
        He changed the channel over to the news. There were puppies dressed in suits. There is never enough people up at 5 in the morning to care about the 5 o'clock news, so they always get the shittiest of shit stories. He always felt bad for the male anchor, because he always looked like he drank an entire bottle of gin the night before. Somehow he knew that the news was important to him at some point in his life, and that his dream was to inform people of the world. It probably died when all the stories that he got involved animals or apartment fires.
        The dog hopped up on the bed again. He fell asleep to the television.

Description
        Somehow while he was sleeping, he kicked his dog off the bed. Normally he didn't have the force of a viking whilst kicking in his sleep, but the large *thump* of his dog hitting the ground woke him up. "Aw fuck, sorry," he said to his dog even though he couldn't understand words. It was storming abnormally hard at the time, so he reached for his phone and checked the weather. It was going to storm all day.
        Since he was up, he switched on his television. There was a commercial on about a spray on hair removal product. He watched as a hairy leg was sprayed with the product, and then whipped with a rag. The hair came off like it does when you bathe in nuclear waste. "Oh great, carcinogens in a bottle," he muttered to himself.
        He changed the channel over to the news. There were puppies dressed in suits. There is never enough people up at 5 in the morning to care about the 5 o'clock news, so they always get the shittiest of shit stories. He always felt bad for the male anchor, because he always looked like he drank an entire bottle of gin the night before. Somehow he knew that the news was important to him at some point in his life, and that his dream was to inform people of the world. It probably died when all the stories that he got involved animals or apartment fires.
        The dog hopped up on the bed again. He fell asleep to the television.