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Menchieee — In Harmony - Chapter Eight
Published: 2012-09-19 13:06:34 +0000 UTC; Views: 291; Favourites: 0; Downloads: 2
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Description Warning: A bit of angst(suicidal thoughts, but it only lasts for few sentences. It gets better at the end of the chapter. I promise this is the only 'strong' angst in this story.)



Amethyst opened her eyes, but the sunlight caught her off guard, and shut them closed again. After a few minutes, she opened them again slowly. She didn't recognize the place she was at, feeling a bit confused. She took her time sitting up, letting her consciousness regain. Taehyun, who is in the room sitting on the floor at the other side of the room, saw her sit up.

"Good afternoon, beautiful." he said with a smile.

"Taehyun?" Amethyst said in a tired voice, also couldn't believe it was already in the afternoon. "Where am I?"

"At my house. In the guest room." Taehyun responded. "Do you remember what happened last night?"

"Yes...but I guess I was too tired or something to not remember that I was here in your house...I hope I'm not a bother..."

"You're not." Taehyun got up and walked over to Amethyst to sit by her. "I made you lunch."

Really? Amethyst was surprised as Taehyun handed her a tray of food. Is this kimbap? Sure looks like it. But...this is the first time I ever had it.

"Jalmeokgessumnida." Amethyst took the first bite and was amazed. "Oh my, it's delicious!"

"I'm glad." Taehyun felt relived. After all, he did make it. "Enjoy the rest of it."

Amethyst enjoyed some more of her lunch until a thought came to her mind. She remembered that she needed to apologize for yesterday. She sat the tray next to her and sighed.

"Taehyun..."

"Hmm?"

"I need to talk to you about something."

"Right, you needed to tell me something yesterday. What is it?"

"It was about yesterday...about what happened earlier that day." Amethyst started to feel hurt about what happened. "I'm...I'm sorry I made you cry."

"Cry? What do you mean cr-"

"Don't try to deny it, Taehyun. I saw one tear. One tear was enough to make me feel bad. And I knew you were going to cry, or else you wouldn't run off." Amethyst sighed. "I do agree that what I said yesterday was harsh, about not giving you the respect you need, and I'm sorry."

"I forgive you." Taehyun said, but he thought of other things that were left unsaid. What about all the other times you hurt me? You did more damage than just yesterday...it just so happened that yesterday was my breaking point...

The two were quiet for a while. Amethyst thought about another thing, but it was something that she really had to think about. She has problems with trusting other people because of her past, but she's thinking of letting that go. She isn't going to make any friends, or if she does then lose them, if she doesn't put her trust into someone. Right now, as terrible as it sounds to her, Taehyun is the only person she has that she is, kind of in her mind, close to. If she keeps pushing him away, she might lose him for good, and that scares her. She wants to keep him so far from her, yet so close.

"Taehyun?" Amethyst said, receiving a hum as a response. "I...I've made the biggest, and to me honestly the most scariest, decision of my life. But...I want to take your word. You know...from a month ago. I want to tell you what's wrong."

Taehyun snapped his head towards her, making sure he heard right the right thing. "Really?"

"Yes..." Amethyst looked in front of her and saw her backpack. She leaned over to get and dugged into it, taking out her journal. Her heart raced, and she kept thinking over and over, making sure she wants to do this. She held it close to her, hoping she won't regret the decision later. She took the journal and handed it to Taehyun. "I want to trust you."

Taehyun took the journal and quickly flipped through the pages, realizing that the writing in it was layout like a diary. Taehyun felt a little unsure and tried to hand the journal back to Amethyst. "Amethyst, I don't think I should read this-"

"The words I've written will explain much better than the words I would speak." Amethyst refused to take it back. "I insist. Please read it."

Taehyun gave an 'are you sure?' look, and Amethyst nodded. "I want to trust you."

"Alright." Taehyun gave in. "You enjoy your lunch, I'll leave for a while and I'll start reading this. If you need me, I'll be in my room, just down the hall."

Amethyst nodded and Taehyun left her alone. She sighed in worry, then continued to eat her lunch.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Taehyun didn't see what was wrong at first, since most of the things written in Amethyst's journal is happy events. If anything was sad, the next entry made it seem like she was feeling okay. Taehyun skipped a few entries to see if there was anything else that didn't seem right. Nothing was bad until something written in big, messy letters caught his eye.

MAYBE I SHOULD GIVE UP

"Give up what?" Taehyun said to himself as he read the page carefully.

No one believes in my dreams. No one believes in me. I want to become this amazing singer in Korea, but everyone laughs at it. Sometimes, I begin the question why I try so hard. I've been trying since I was eight. I believed in myself, but I guess no one else believes in me. This gives me a reason to not try anymore. Maybe I will fail. Maybe I won't succeed. Maybe I should give up. Maybe I shouldn't give up just singing. Maybe I should give up at everything.

Including life.

Taehyun's eyes widen at the single sentence, but it didn't end there. There was more.

I've been made fun of so many times. Everyone forgets about me. Guess what? My so called 'friends' forgot my birthday. And my family didn't really get me anything, just cards and such. What am I suppose to do with that? Why can't someone give me something special that I can treasure for the rest of my dang life? I guess no one finds me special. I guess no one takes me seriously. I guess I should be done. Maybe I should end it here.

Maybe I don't deserve to be here.

Reading such a thing broke Taehyun's heart, and he's almost in tears. He looked at the date of the entry. Sept. 10th. Today is September 13th, so it's fairly recent. Why does Amethyst feel like this? I mean about feeling like she give up everything, including life? Taehyun worried.

The continued reading some more, mainly the negative ones to find anymore that Amethyst could be worried about. But the most he could find is scared that she won't become a singer and that she finds it hard to trust someone. Thinking back to the last time they were at the cafe together, he finally realizes why Amethyst didn't want to believe anything he said, since she's scared to trust people. Of course she said that herself, but he didn't think it was this serious.

Suddenly, a little piece of paper slipped under the door. It confused Taehyun why Amethyst would do such a thing, when he said that she could just knock if she needed something. Taehyun got up and picked up the paper and read it.

I'm a burden, I'm sorry
I'll be taking my leave now
Goodbye

I really hope this is not what I think it is...Taehyun became worried. After reading her journal, the last thing he wants is for Amethyst to take her life, and at his own home. He wouldn't be able to forgive himself if something this serious happens to her.

Taehyun left the room and rushed to the guest room. Opening the door, he saw Amethyst at a table that is against the wall, touching a pair of scissors. Just only barely picking them up, Taehyun rushed to her and put his hand on top of hers, not letting her pick them up. Amethyst stood in silence, breathing hard, trying to hold back her tears.

"Don't do this." Taehyun's voice was low and full of worry. "Whatever you were about to do, don't do it."

"Do you have anything longer than a pair of scissors?" Amethyst said quietly.

"Don't you dare ask me that." Taehyun swore he had a heart attack when he heard the question.

Taehyun then wrapped his arms around Amethyst's waist from behind. "Don't ask a question like that. Also..." Taehyun sighed. "If you go...I'll go with you."

Amethyst's eyes widen at what she heard.

"If you hoped for something longer than scissors...if it's was long enough, it could take out both of us...because I'm not letting you go." Taehyun tightened his grip around Amethyst. He meant it to, but he also tested her to see if she would or wouldn't do such a thing if someone else life was on the line. "Of course I would do everything in my power to stop you, but if I failed, I'd rather die than feel guilty for not saving you for the rest of my life."

That is what you call crazy...but that's also what you call true love...Taehyun thought to himself.

"If you were behind me like this, I wouldn't do it. I couldn't take someone's life like that." Amethyst admitted.

"Even if I wasn't, you shouldn't do it to yourself." Taehyun let his friend go and turned her to face him. "You have a wonderful dream, and I know you want to achieve it. You can't let people get to you and give up. You need to keep going, you need to believe in yourself. I mean I'm here to support you, but even if I wasn't, you need to tell yourself that you're going to make it. You're doing what you love, don't you dare give up on it."

Amethyst didn't know what emotion to feel. She feels sad because she's so hard on herself, but at the same time she feels happy and touched because someone is actually supporting and encouraging her. She's on the verge of tears, but she held them in.

"I heard you sing, Amethyst. The first day of school and yesterday. You sound amazing, and I believe you have the potential to make it big here in Korea one day. But even if you don't make it, don't give up. Keep singing your heart and soul out, but find another dream to work on, another thing you love with all your heart, and make that your new goal in life." Taehyun grabbed her shoulders. "There is a strong person in you. And I know for a fact that person doesn't want to give up. She just needs to be pushed a little. She just needs support...and I'm willing to be the support she need."

Amethyst felt a tear fall down her cheek. You seriously have a heart of gold...and I only said I wanted to trust you, I didn't say completely yet...I don't know, but what you're saying is making me happy...and that fact that you practically saved me...I'm grateful...

Amethyst wiped her cheek, and took a minute to calm down. "Will you take me home?"

"Of course. Just promise me you won't hurt yourself."

"I won't. I promise." Amethyst meant it too.
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