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Description
Block 10

I was born in Amsterdam, Holland and married in 1939. I was living in a village at the time the Nazi's made all of the Jews move to Amsterdam. We only took with us 2 suitcases. The police thought it would be best if we were to go into hiding, but we had no one, so they set us up. One night they came and took us to a house, where we were hidden in the attic. We were only supposed to be there for 4 weeks, but we ended up hiding there for 2 years. We weren't allowed to go outside or downstairs during the day, but at night, were could come down and play cards or even chess with our hosts.

Eventually, food shortages became a problem and food stamps were given out to moderate rations. The family couldn't feed four extra people on rations made for only two, but they somehow got a hold of extras. We think that the neighbors may have become suspicious about all of the food, because one night, the Nazi's came and took us to their "police station," where we met my brother and his wife, to my surprise. I was glad they survived. All of us caught hiding were marked with an "S," for "SPECIAL TREATMENT," much like the yellow star.

They then brought us to a center with the rest of the Jews, and then we were loaded into trucks and taken, to what I later found out, was Auschwitz; right off the bat, my father, brother, and husband were taken and loaded into trucks. My mother was then taken with the rest of the older women and women with babies and then loaded into their own trucks. I begged to go with her, to take care of her, but I know now that if I was allowed to go, I would not be alive today. My mother was 46.

My sister (in-law) and I were taken to a building where they stripped us and shaved all of our body hair off of us, and then taken to showers and given prisoner clothes. After that we were taken and our mouths checked. I had a small gold crown at the time, and right there, it was ripped from my mouth. Bleeding from my mouth and crying, my sister and I were taken to be tattooed. The man felt sorry for me and said he would give me the smallest tattoo he could, and he did.

Most of the women were taken away, but those of us that had the "S," were sent to the horrible block 10. There, we could see all of the women, bald and I thought I had seen my mother among them. The place smelled like burning rubber and there were ashes everywhere. One woman pointed to the fire and said, "look, there's your mother, gassed and burned, but you will go the same way, so don't worry." I was shocked.

After a little while, some men came in with papers and told us that, here in block 10, women were experimented on. They told us that there were papers that we had to sign saying we understood and were volunteering of our own free will. We didn't really have a choice. Most of the women decided not to sign, saying it was better to be gassed now and die, then to go through all of that pain and be gassed anyway. Not much of a choice. My sister and I signed up though.

We were taken through the block and could see all of the women in their cells, with burns, and holes through their body, and some even with their limbs missing. I was terrified of what they might do to me, and so changed my mind. I told my sister and she agreed. When they came for us the next day, we told them just that and many other women changed their minds too. I guess they were afraid that they would all change their minds, cause they told us that we couldn't change our minds. We were terrified and crying.

A couple of days later, the experiments started. They brought us to a room where we had to lay down on a table, where they strapped us down.I think it was some kind of woman sterilization experiment. It started with 24 injections and various parts of my body. I was very sore after, as well as others. Then they injected something, I am not sure what, into our wombs and ovaries. Whatever it was, it burned like nothing else, and the pain was beyond anything I could endure. Of course, they didn't give us anything, no anesthetic. After the war, I had so many health problems, that my husband wanted to know what they injected us with. We later found out it was formaldehyde. The long needles they used often left open sores and such and because of our low resistance, they never healed.

I remember, there was a doctor in the block, that the Nazi's forced to work with them. She tried her best to help us as much as possible and would even sneak into our cells at night and clean and dress our wounds. Once, during one of the experiments, I was getting dizzy, and she let the needle fall out, insisting that it was an accident. To this day, I believe that if it weren't for her, i would not have survived. I thank her.

One day they loaded us into a truck to be gassed. We were crying. After all of these tortures we had endured, we didn't want to die, but then some came and pulled my sister and I, along with a few others, and said that they were not finished with our experiments. We were kept in block 10 and forced to endure more, until about the first week of January 1945, I think, when we were taken and the Nazi's tried the evacuate Auschwitz and burn block 10 before the Soviet came.

We were made to walk the death walk, and sometimes we were transported in cattle cars. It was cold and I had a coat, but no shoes; my toes froze. Some people were shot dead, died of starvation, or exposure; it lasted about 7-8 days, I think. When we finally arrived in Ravensbruck, Lily weighed only 63 lbs; she was a living skeleton. I was a little better off than her. If it weren't for each other, I have no doubt, we both would have died.

There was no room for us there and we were forced to sleep outside on straw. They came and took those of us who were in fairly good shape and made us work on an airport and took Lily and the rest to be gassed. I went to the hospital to look for her, and there I found the doctor who had helped us in Auschwitz, and she told me she was there, but was not going to live. She let me take care of her; I tried getting lice off of her body that were leaving sores and fed her with what little we had. Somehow, I don't know how, I saved her.

In April the same year, the Soviet came to liberate us, and then the Dutch came looking for other dutch; they said that they had a house with lots of food they had set up, but we were afraid to take Lily, who was still so fragile. I refused to leave her behind, so we found a wheelbarrow and that is how she was taken. After a few days, the men urged us to cross the river to where the Americans were; we were convinced that they could save her. They put us in a small boat and we went across.

I didn't know much English, but as soon as I saw an American soldier and started to cry and yell; help help, please help. In no time about 15 or so were around us. They stared at Lily and seemed afraid to touch her. Doctors came with a stretcher for her and we were taken to the hospital. At first they only gave us rice water to stop our diarrhea, and other liquids for about 3 weeks, then they started giving us soft solids. Doctors came wanting to know what happened.

I wanted to go back so Holland to bad, but I waited for Lily to get well enough to travel. Eventually, they took us to South of Holland. We were so happy to have all the torture behind us. A committee looked after us there, before they took us to Amsterdam. It was hard there and there was almost no food. Other people were already living in our apartment, so we had to live in the salvation army building.

Luckily my brother and husband survived. I didn't know at the time but my husband was sick, and although he knew, Lily and I never talked about what happened in block 10, but I still had nightmares. I was so depressed and also guilty over not being able to save my mother, that I had to be hospitalized, but I recovered and went back to my husband. Because of the experiments, I couldn't have any children, so we adopted, but three months later, my husband died. It seems he never got over his time in the camp, and I was too busy with my own heartache to help him with his.

Eventually I married again, but then Lily and my brother died within years of each other and after a long sickness, my husband died as well; I was devastated, and 22 years ago, I married my third husband. He was a friend before we were married and he was the one that encouraged me to talk about my time in Auschwitz.

Not many of us who were experimented on, survived. I realized it was my part in this world to tell their story. They all asked that, if we survived, to tell everyone and never forget them, and so I didn't.

Description
Block 10

I was born in Amsterdam, Holland and married in 1939. I was living in a village at the time the Nazi's made all of the Jews move to Amsterdam. We only took with us 2 suitcases. The police thought it would be best if we were to go into hiding, but we had no one, so they set us up. One night they came and took us to a house, where we were hidden in the attic. We were only supposed to be there for 4 weeks, but we ended up hiding there for 2 years. We weren't allowed to go outside or downstairs during the day, but at night, were could come down and play cards or even chess with our hosts.

Eventually, food shortages became a problem and food stamps were given out to moderate rations. The family couldn't feed four extra people on rations made for only two, but they somehow got a hold of extras. We think that the neighbors may have become suspicious about all of the food, because one night, the Nazi's came and took us to their "police station," where we met my brother and his wife, to my surprise. I was glad they survived. All of us caught hiding were marked with an "S," for "SPECIAL TREATMENT," much like the yellow star.

They then brought us to a center with the rest of the Jews, and then we were loaded into trucks and taken, to what I later found out, was Auschwitz; right off the bat, my father, brother, and husband were taken and loaded into trucks. My mother was then taken with the rest of the older women and women with babies and then loaded into their own trucks. I begged to go with her, to take care of her, but I know now that if I was allowed to go, I would not be alive today. My mother was 46.

My sister (in-law) and I were taken to a building where they stripped us and shaved all of our body hair off of us, and then taken to showers and given prisoner clothes. After that we were taken and our mouths checked. I had a small gold crown at the time, and right there, it was ripped from my mouth. Bleeding from my mouth and crying, my sister and I were taken to be tattooed. The man felt sorry for me and said he would give me the smallest tattoo he could, and he did.

Most of the women were taken away, but those of us that had the "S," were sent to the horrible block 10. There, we could see all of the women, bald and I thought I had seen my mother among them. The place smelled like burning rubber and there were ashes everywhere. One woman pointed to the fire and said, "look, there's your mother, gassed and burned, but you will go the same way, so don't worry." I was shocked.

After a little while, some men came in with papers and told us that, here in block 10, women were experimented on. They told us that there were papers that we had to sign saying we understood and were volunteering of our own free will. We didn't really have a choice. Most of the women decided not to sign, saying it was better to be gassed now and die, then to go through all of that pain and be gassed anyway. Not much of a choice. My sister and I signed up though.

We were taken through the block and could see all of the women in their cells, with burns, and holes through their body, and some even with their limbs missing. I was terrified of what they might do to me, and so changed my mind. I told my sister and she agreed. When they came for us the next day, we told them just that and many other women changed their minds too. I guess they were afraid that they would all change their minds, cause they told us that we couldn't change our minds. We were terrified and crying.

A couple of days later, the experiments started. They brought us to a room where we had to lay down on a table, where they strapped us down.I think it was some kind of woman sterilization experiment. It started with 24 injections and various parts of my body. I was very sore after, as well as others. Then they injected something, I am not sure what, into our wombs and ovaries. Whatever it was, it burned like nothing else, and the pain was beyond anything I could endure. Of course, they didn't give us anything, no anesthetic. After the war, I had so many health problems, that my husband wanted to know what they injected us with. We later found out it was formaldehyde. The long needles they used often left open sores and such and because of our low resistance, they never healed.

I remember, there was a doctor in the block, that the Nazi's forced to work with them. She tried her best to help us as much as possible and would even sneak into our cells at night and clean and dress our wounds. Once, during one of the experiments, I was getting dizzy, and she let the needle fall out, insisting that it was an accident. To this day, I believe that if it weren't for her, i would not have survived. I thank her.

One day they loaded us into a truck to be gassed. We were crying. After all of these tortures we had endured, we didn't want to die, but then some came and pulled my sister and I, along with a few others, and said that they were not finished with our experiments. We were kept in block 10 and forced to endure more, until about the first week of January 1945, I think, when we were taken and the Nazi's tried the evacuate Auschwitz and burn block 10 before the Soviet came.

We were made to walk the death walk, and sometimes we were transported in cattle cars. It was cold and I had a coat, but no shoes; my toes froze. Some people were shot dead, died of starvation, or exposure; it lasted about 7-8 days, I think. When we finally arrived in Ravensbruck, Lily weighed only 63 lbs; she was a living skeleton. I was a little better off than her. If it weren't for each other, I have no doubt, we both would have died.

There was no room for us there and we were forced to sleep outside on straw. They came and took those of us who were in fairly good shape and made us work on an airport and took Lily and the rest to be gassed. I went to the hospital to look for her, and there I found the doctor who had helped us in Auschwitz, and she told me she was there, but was not going to live. She let me take care of her; I tried getting lice off of her body that were leaving sores and fed her with what little we had. Somehow, I don't know how, I saved her.

In April the same year, the Soviet came to liberate us, and then the Dutch came looking for other dutch; they said that they had a house with lots of food they had set up, but we were afraid to take Lily, who was still so fragile. I refused to leave her behind, so we found a wheelbarrow and that is how she was taken. After a few days, the men urged us to cross the river to where the Americans were; we were convinced that they could save her. They put us in a small boat and we went across.

I didn't know much English, but as soon as I saw an American soldier and started to cry and yell; help help, please help. In no time about 15 or so were around us. They stared at Lily and seemed afraid to touch her. Doctors came with a stretcher for her and we were taken to the hospital. At first they only gave us rice water to stop our diarrhea, and other liquids for about 3 weeks, then they started giving us soft solids. Doctors came wanting to know what happened.

I wanted to go back so Holland to bad, but I waited for Lily to get well enough to travel. Eventually, they took us to South of Holland. We were so happy to have all the torture behind us. A committee looked after us there, before they took us to Amsterdam. It was hard there and there was almost no food. Other people were already living in our apartment, so we had to live in the salvation army building.

Luckily my brother and husband survived. I didn't know at the time but my husband was sick, and although he knew, Lily and I never talked about what happened in block 10, but I still had nightmares. I was so depressed and also guilty over not being able to save my mother, that I had to be hospitalized, but I recovered and went back to my husband. Because of the experiments, I couldn't have any children, so we adopted, but three months later, my husband died. It seems he never got over his time in the camp, and I was too busy with my own heartache to help him with his.

Eventually I married again, but then Lily and my brother died within years of each other and after a long sickness, my husband died as well; I was devastated, and 22 years ago, I married my third husband. He was a friend before we were married and he was the one that encouraged me to talk about my time in Auschwitz.

Not many of us who were experimented on, survived. I realized it was my part in this world to tell their story. They all asked that, if we survived, to tell everyone and never forget them, and so I didn't.