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okapi-queen — That I Lived
#healing #poem #poetry #recovery #emotional
Published: 2019-12-06 06:22:23 +0000 UTC; Views: 196; Favourites: 0; Downloads: 0
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Description
Things like dreams and looking back somedaySeemed fictional to me.
Convinced what I’ve seen was all I’d ever know,
It felt right to be content and wait to die.
Now I watch my reflection in the train window,
Somewhat older but just beginning.
And as the skyscrapers rise against a sunrise,
I realize only now’s the first time
That I’ve lived,
Understanding what it meant
When God said, “It’s done.”
Or wonder about the future without fearing-
Who’d have thought?
Even though,
The world hardly changed
Around the me who has,
I’m so grateful
That I lived through it.
Things like love and holding humans close
Were meaningless to me.
Thinking like that, as boring as it was,
It made no sense for such complications.
A billboard reads “It’s better with you here,”
And faces fill my mind to the brim.
The longing to feel another’s heartbeat
Tells me, while that was impossible,
That I lived
With a reason to pray
And know it’s heard above.
Or smile stupidly from seeing you again-
Can you believe?
Even though,
The unknown slowly steps back
One day at a time,
I’m so grateful
That I lived at all.
