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Description
It`s as if I`m being devoured.
Inside out, by my own soul.
The hatred that is captured within,
Wanting to spill out,
But where`s the exit sign?
There is none.
Bottle the emotions up.
All of them.
Stuff them within yourself,
So no one knows
This disgusting person that you are.

------

I feel as if you`re invading me.
Is it jealousy?
Or possessiveness?
For those that were once dear to me
But now belong only to you ?

------

I have a strong
Distaste for them.
But as much as I dislike them,
I also look down upon myself.
I wish I could begin anew,
Or fade away,
But would that just be
Running away?
Trying to find
The quickest route to
Escape ?

------

I wish to be able to,
To someday, hopefully someday,
Love myself.
Wholly and definitely.
Just love
All the sides that are there to me.
Even if I am disgusted
By the different people that I encompass,
I hope
I can simply
Enjoy who I am
Without fretting about
All these trivial immature things
That ruin my mind
And my
Happiness.

------

I really
Want to be able to say someday
That I`m

"Happy".

I know I have the power
To create my own 'Happiness'
But it`s so difficult.
I wonder if I have been blessed
With a sunny personality
Or with a mind
That rationalizes everything
That criticizes everything
And that makes me
Look at the world
With distaste

------

I want to be able
To look back
To those days
Where I cried
Everyday
And simply laugh it off,
Brushing it aside
And taking it as something
That was ridiculous
And trivial.
Not as something
That I feel as if
Will repeat
Again.
Over and over
Again.

------

I hope
That I can learn to trust people more.
That I won`t be back stabbed,
That I won`t be overly judgmental of others,
And that I can find people
Who are more than just mere acquaintances.
That are genuine friends.
But , besides the one person I have right now,
Do people like that truly exist ?
People, besides our family,
And maybe that one best friend,
Are there citizens of the world,
That will indefinitely love you?
Just for you?

------

So many little things.
The little things
Eat away at me.
It`s as if
There`s always something
Nagging
At my mind.
Something to ruin
My mood.
There`s always something,
Spontaneously,
That changes me.
So quickly.
That brings me down,
And ruins who I am ?

------

I don`t know.
Anything.
It`s true.
The mistakes I`ve made.
Well, I`m sorry.
Perhaps that is not enough,
But it is what I have the power to say.
Sorry.
Sorry.
Sorry.
Many apologies.
To everyone
Who has ever encountered me.
And hopefully,
Someday,
I may be able to apologize
To myself.
So

Dear Me,

Sorry for treating you
The way I do .
I hope you find
Your 'happiness' soon.
And keep it.
Forever.

Description
It`s as if I`m being devoured.
Inside out, by my own soul.
The hatred that is captured within,
Wanting to spill out,
But where`s the exit sign?
There is none.
Bottle the emotions up.
All of them.
Stuff them within yourself,
So no one knows
This disgusting person that you are.

------

I feel as if you`re invading me.
Is it jealousy?
Or possessiveness?
For those that were once dear to me
But now belong only to you ?

------

I have a strong
Distaste for them.
But as much as I dislike them,
I also look down upon myself.
I wish I could begin anew,
Or fade away,
But would that just be
Running away?
Trying to find
The quickest route to
Escape ?

------

I wish to be able to,
To someday, hopefully someday,
Love myself.
Wholly and definitely.
Just love
All the sides that are there to me.
Even if I am disgusted
By the different people that I encompass,
I hope
I can simply
Enjoy who I am
Without fretting about
All these trivial immature things
That ruin my mind
And my
Happiness.

------

I really
Want to be able to say someday
That I`m

"Happy".

I know I have the power
To create my own 'Happiness'
But it`s so difficult.
I wonder if I have been blessed
With a sunny personality
Or with a mind
That rationalizes everything
That criticizes everything
And that makes me
Look at the world
With distaste

------

I want to be able
To look back
To those days
Where I cried
Everyday
And simply laugh it off,
Brushing it aside
And taking it as something
That was ridiculous
And trivial.
Not as something
That I feel as if
Will repeat
Again.
Over and over
Again.

------

I hope
That I can learn to trust people more.
That I won`t be back stabbed,
That I won`t be overly judgmental of others,
And that I can find people
Who are more than just mere acquaintances.
That are genuine friends.
But , besides the one person I have right now,
Do people like that truly exist ?
People, besides our family,
And maybe that one best friend,
Are there citizens of the world,
That will indefinitely love you?
Just for you?

------

So many little things.
The little things
Eat away at me.
It`s as if
There`s always something
Nagging
At my mind.
Something to ruin
My mood.
There`s always something,
Spontaneously,
That changes me.
So quickly.
That brings me down,
And ruins who I am ?

------

I don`t know.
Anything.
It`s true.
The mistakes I`ve made.
Well, I`m sorry.
Perhaps that is not enough,
But it is what I have the power to say.
Sorry.
Sorry.
Sorry.
Many apologies.
To everyone
Who has ever encountered me.
And hopefully,
Someday,
I may be able to apologize
To myself.
So

Dear Me,

Sorry for treating you
The way I do .
I hope you find
Your 'happiness' soon.
And keep it.
Forever.