HOME | DD

Description
I was once eaten up from the inside by a dream.

As I lay in reverie, it tenderised my solid heart to make a soft organ for you to push your way into. A tiny hole was formed as you crept in, unnoticed, and it closed up behind you, creating a tiny scar that can never heal. A throbbing vein that I can feel but never knew what it meant until the day I was born. The day I came to life, the day I realised what it was to be truly alive…

I knew you meant more to me than you had before, I knew you had managed to beat your way into my head, past my numerous barriers and create a little nest. I was ok with that. I didn't realise that you’d been exploring the rest of my body too. I didn’t realise you’d been spying out the land to find another organ to branch out into. But you did. And you stayed there. Unnoticed.

Until that day, I didn’t actually know I liked you. I’d had strange feelings since September but they were shrugged off. I was used to strange feelings – still am. I reckoned they were bad news and let them fester without my intrusion. I couldn’t be bothered with that kind of drama. Not after everything that had happened. I didn’t realise the sensation was you feeling your way round me.

That night, I wanted you to tell me something. About white knights galloping through the interwebs. But really, that wasn’t important. What I really wanted was to see if the feeling (that I’d vowed to leave alone and failed) was really what I thought it was. I thought of saying it to you. “I love you”. It was what I’d been holding in all this time. I loved you and all I wanted was your touch.

“Ok, fine. That’s my end of the deal. Now, who likes me?”

“Well…um…I’m not sure about right now but I’ve had feelings for you…Y’know, in the past…But you can erase that from your mind now.” Great job brain, well done. You total liar and you coward. You told yourself you’d tell him today! Now look what you’ve done!

“I guess that’s some recompense, to be perfectly honest, I’ve had feelings for you as well in the past.”

In the past?

…I’m too late…

“Ok, maybe I like you. Maybe that’s what I’ve not been saying…” I wait for reply… It takes an eternity…

“Ah well, the thing is…I was trying to suppress my feelings for you…”

I’m not too late! I smile and feel waves of heat explode over me as soft tears start running down my face.

Pause…“I love you.”

Finally: “I love you too.”

Someone loved me…

Now look what happened…You are not only in my head and mind but you run in my veins, you are all around me, you are the other half of me, my universe. I never ever wanted to leave you. Ever. I tried to delay it as long as possible.

When we broke up, it shattered my universe
but I know it was necessary.

I was once eaten up from the inside by a dream.

Now I realise
the dream was you.

Is
you…

Description
I was once eaten up from the inside by a dream.

As I lay in reverie, it tenderised my solid heart to make a soft organ for you to push your way into. A tiny hole was formed as you crept in, unnoticed, and it closed up behind you, creating a tiny scar that can never heal. A throbbing vein that I can feel but never knew what it meant until the day I was born. The day I came to life, the day I realised what it was to be truly alive…

I knew you meant more to me than you had before, I knew you had managed to beat your way into my head, past my numerous barriers and create a little nest. I was ok with that. I didn't realise that you’d been exploring the rest of my body too. I didn’t realise you’d been spying out the land to find another organ to branch out into. But you did. And you stayed there. Unnoticed.

Until that day, I didn’t actually know I liked you. I’d had strange feelings since September but they were shrugged off. I was used to strange feelings – still am. I reckoned they were bad news and let them fester without my intrusion. I couldn’t be bothered with that kind of drama. Not after everything that had happened. I didn’t realise the sensation was you feeling your way round me.

That night, I wanted you to tell me something. About white knights galloping through the interwebs. But really, that wasn’t important. What I really wanted was to see if the feeling (that I’d vowed to leave alone and failed) was really what I thought it was. I thought of saying it to you. “I love you”. It was what I’d been holding in all this time. I loved you and all I wanted was your touch.

“Ok, fine. That’s my end of the deal. Now, who likes me?”

“Well…um…I’m not sure about right now but I’ve had feelings for you…Y’know, in the past…But you can erase that from your mind now.” Great job brain, well done. You total liar and you coward. You told yourself you’d tell him today! Now look what you’ve done!

“I guess that’s some recompense, to be perfectly honest, I’ve had feelings for you as well in the past.”

In the past?

…I’m too late…

“Ok, maybe I like you. Maybe that’s what I’ve not been saying…” I wait for reply… It takes an eternity…

“Ah well, the thing is…I was trying to suppress my feelings for you…”

I’m not too late! I smile and feel waves of heat explode over me as soft tears start running down my face.

Pause…“I love you.”

Finally: “I love you too.”

Someone loved me…

Now look what happened…You are not only in my head and mind but you run in my veins, you are all around me, you are the other half of me, my universe. I never ever wanted to leave you. Ever. I tried to delay it as long as possible.

When we broke up, it shattered my universe
but I know it was necessary.

I was once eaten up from the inside by a dream.

Now I realise
the dream was you.

Is
you…