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Title: Hey There Draco Chapter 6
Chapter Title: When You Walk Away
Author: Ruby13b
Summary: Set in the summer after fifth year. Draco and Harry are thrown together by chance and what starts off as morbid curiosity transforms into an adventure that neither of them will ever forget.
Warnings: Adult Language, Sexual Content, Violence.
Disclaimer: I own nothing and am owned by no one.
Author's Notes: Thanks to everyone reading this story! Thanks to M!

This is a Harry/Draco fanfiction, meaning boy/boy. If you don't like don't read! You have been warned

Draco watched Harry as he slept. He had woken only an hour or so after dawn, in spite of his resolve to sleep in. Harry was curled on his side, his chest rising and falling with every deep breath he took. The incident with the Wizard Aphrodisiac had left Draco with such thoughts of confusion and dread that he scarcely knew himself. As Harry slept on, Draco mused and pondered over his dilemma. The problem wasn’t about what had happened with the aphrodisiac, it was about why it had happened. Draco knew that Wizard Aphrodisiacs only worked when there was attraction between two parties to begin with. Even if it was only a small glimmer of attraction, a Wizard Aphrodisiac would pull it out and amplify it to its full effect. The aphrodisiac never created something out of nothing. Then that meant… Draco gulped and looked away from Harry. He couldn’t bear to think of it anymore. It wasn’t the fact that Harry was a boy. It was that he was Harry Potter. That was reason enough.

Draco looked back at Harry. There was such an ache in his chest every time he looked at Harry now. What were all of these sudden feelings? They were almost too overbearing to grasp. Draco resolved not to tell Harry anything. He would not let Harry know about the true effects of the Wizard Aphrodisiac, nor reveal any of his own tattered feelings. Draco would have to pretend that it never happened, which was, of course, easier said than done.

Draco’s musings were interrupted by a loud crash. He could hear some sort of commotion coming from downstairs in the kitchen. Draco wondered what could be so important that such a racket had to be made this early in the morning. Harry suddenly sat straight up in bed, rubbing his eyes. He listened for a moment before throwing back his blankets, jumping out of bed and running out of the room. It all had happened so fast that Draco had to shake his head. He was just about to follow after Harry when Harry came back, shutting the door behind him. Then, without ceremony, Harry stripped off his nightclothes and pulled on dark trousers and a shirt. Draco blushed and tried to look away. He had seen Harry Potter naked before, but after the incident with the aphrodisiac it just seemed different.

“Where are you going?” Draco asked.

Harry paused, his wand in his hand. “We have a lead,” Harry answered vaguely, stuffing his wand in his pocket. “I have to go.”

Draco was confused. He hadn’t thought that Harry was being included in the Order. Draco looked over at Harry, who was now stuffing something into his knapsack. Draco caught a glimpse of something which was silver and glittery before Harry closed the knapsack shut.

Draco felt a sudden heat rise up inside of him. “Why do you have to go?” he shouted. “Why is it always you?”

“I don’t know!” Harry returned, throwing his knapsack down. “I don’t know. I didn’t choose this. I never have. If I had my way I would leave. I would run away. I would run so fast and for so long I would lose everything, even myself. I would forget myself if I could, but I can’t. I must go, Draco.”

“But it’s not fair!” Draco cried. “Can I not go with you?” he asked in a small voice.

Harry shook his head. “It’s better that you stay here. I don’t want anyone else to be put in danger. To know that everyone here will be safe will be a great comfort to me.”

“So I just have to wait,” Draco said, bitterly. “Wait and see if you make it back alive.”

Harry didn’t say anything. He stooped down, picked up his knapsack and headed for the door. Draco watched, while trying (and failing) to hide his worried face. Harry opened the door and hesitated.

“Goodbye,” Harry whispered. He closed the door behind him.

Draco counted the steps Harry took as he walked down the hallway, his footsteps echoing away in the distance.

1… 2… 3… 4… 5…Pause. Then the footsteps started coming back. 5… 4… 3… 2… 1… The door flew open, and there stood a very flustered Harry Potter.

“Draco, I…well…I…” Harry stumbled.

“You didn’t make it very far,” Draco said, trying to smile.

Harry tried to smile, too, but it was rather forced. “I just couldn’t leave things like that,” he said quietly. Draco opened his mouth, but no words came out so he shut it again and hung his head. “What are we doing?” Harry asked, sweeping his hand through his messy locks. “I’ll be back in a few hours. I’m not leaving forever. I’ll be back, I will.” Harry was rambling and he knew, it so he shut his mouth.

“You better come back,” Draco said. “Harry, I--” Draco couldn’t say it. He didn’t even know what he wanted to say.

Before Draco even knew what was happening, Harry had closed the distance between them and was hugging him rather awkwardly. Draco wrapped his arms around Harry, who relaxed into the embrace.

“Come back safe,” Draco whispered into Harry’s neck. “Please.”

“I promise,” Harry told him sincerely. He let go of Draco and looked him in the eyes. “You have my word.”

Draco nodded, feeling like he was suddenly fighting back tears. Harry gave Draco’s shoulder a little squeeze and then left the room, shutting the door behind him.

Draco was left alone feeling lost and confused. Harry’s discarded clothes lay crumpled on the floor. Draco wandered over and picked up Harry’s nightshirt. He held it up to his nose. It smelled just like him. Draco could still feel Harry’s embrace. It had felt so right being in Harry’s arms. It was just a touch, but that touch had been a thousand worlds. And yet, it hadn’t lasted long enough. Draco gulped and let the shirt fall to the ground. This was going beyond the point of obsession. It almost sickened Draco when he thought of how he was behaving. Harry was a big boy. He could take care of himself. Even so, Draco just couldn’t seem to shake this feeling that he had.

Draco shook his head and got dressed as quickly as possible. He left the room and began searching the house for someone, anyone. For some reason he didn’t feel like being alone. He couldn’t explain it, and he didn’t want to explain it. There wasn’t anyone in the drawing room and Draco didn’t check the library. The kitchen was empty as well. It seemed that all the occupants of the house who had been left behind were still sleeping. Draco sat down at the kitchen table. He unconsciously sat down in the chair Harry usually occupied. Draco didn’t realize it until after he had been sitting there a couple of minutes. He didn’t move.

It wasn’t until midday that anyone came into the kitchen. It was Fred and George. Draco had been planning on yelling at them and maybe playing some sort of nasty prank to get revenge, but he didn’t feel like it anymore. When the twins saw him they both grinned and sat down on either side of him.

“Have a nice night, Malfoy?” Fred asked, innocently.

“We didn’t hear much coming from your room,” George said.

“We had thought you would be a screamer,” Fred added.

“Could you just leave me alone?” Draco mumbled, though he knew he ought not to waste his breath. The twins were having too much fun.

“Where’s Harry, then?” George asked, looking around as if he expected Harry to suddenly appear out of thin air. “Still in bed, is he? Wear lover boy out, did you?”

“He’s gone,” Draco answered.

“Gone?” Fred questioned. He glanced at his brother before adding, “It wasn’t that bad, was it?”

“Nothing happened!” Draco snapped. “Now leave me alone!”

“Wait, wait,” George said, seriously. “Where is Harry? Did you have a fight?”

“He’s with the Order,” Draco said. “And no, we didn’t fight.”

“With the Order?” Fred asked. He seemed genuinely shocked and even a little concerned. “Why is he with the Order?”

“Something about a lead,” Draco answered, dully. “And now he’s gone.”

“He’ll come back,” Fred assured him, quickly glancing at George, who nodded. “He always does.”

Draco nodded, but he wasn’t taking Fred’s word for it. How could he know that Harry would come back? What if something happened to him? Something could happen to him.

“So,” George began, “why didn’t anything happen last night? We were so sure it would.”

“It would have,” Draco said, rubbing his eyes, “but Harry threw the aphrodisiac out the window before it did.”

The twins’ faces lit up and they exchanged very satisfied glances.

“Well, we’ve lit the fire,” Fred said, happily. “Now all you and Harry have to do is follow through.”

“May I ask you something?” Draco asked, sighing. The twins nodded. “Why did you do it?”

“Come on!” Fred exclaimed, as if it were the simplest thing ever. “We see the way you look at him when you think nobody’s watching.”

“And last night, the questions Harry answered for us led us to believe he just might feel the same way,” George added.

“I wish you hadn’t,” Draco said, bitterly. “I was all right not knowing my own feelings.”

The twins nodded sympathetically, which vexed Draco greatly, but he ignored them. His thoughts traveled back to Harry. His thoughts always seemed to return to Harry. Draco wondered what he was doing at that very moment. What thoughts were running through his head? Where was he?

Draco looked up and noticed that the twins were watching him.

“What?” Draco asked, resentfully.

“You were thinking about him,” George said.

“I was not,” Draco denied. He had had just about enough of this. He got up from his chair.

“Where are you going?” Fred asked.

“I feel like being alone right now,” Draco muttered. He left the kitchen and went into the drawing room. Plopping himself down on one of the couches, Draco heaved a heavy sigh. This was torture. The seconds felt like days, and each hour was a thousand lifetimes. Draco’s head was full of such madness that he was certain it would explode. Such dreadful images kept running through his mind. Draco didn’t know how much more he could take. He suddenly began coughing, wincing with each cough. Draco had been so concerned about Harry that he had forgotten his own pain. It wasn’t like his pain mattered that much, anyway. Draco rubbed his chest, taking a few shaky breaths.

Draco picked up one of the pillows on the couch and held it close to himself. Why did he feel like crying? Draco had never been one to cry easily over situations. However, recently, it seemed that all he did was cry. He felt so helpless. Maybe crying was all he could do. What began as a single tear, which Draco hastily wiped away, soon transformed into what must have looked like a river coursing down his face. Draco just kept crying and crying. It felt as if he would never stop. Droplet after droplet ran down his face, falling onto the pillow he was holding and creating a patch of wet. Draco didn’t care that the pillow was steadily becoming damper and damper as he wept. Nor did he care that he had cried so much that his tears were beginning to sting his eyes. No, Draco did not care about these things. He was blind to them. All he could see was Harry Potter’s face. Harry’s smile, how warm it was. It was like a thousand summer days. But his eyes were so sharp, so piercing. Draco could recall how brightly they shone with passion while he spoke of what he had to do. It had only been a few hours since then, yet Draco felt so distant from that time. As if it had never even happened at all.

Draco wiped the tears off of his face with the back of his hand. He had to get ahold of himself. Crying was not going to help Harry. Though there really wasn’t anything he could do for Harry at the moment. He was just going to have to wait it out. Draco soon learned that waiting was the hardest thing he would ever have to do. It was one thing to have a choice in what you waited for, but to be on the edge of something that you couldn’t escape was torture.

Draco’s solitude didn’t last as long as he would have liked. He was soon joined by Ron and Ginny. Was he to be bothered by every Weasley in the country today? They sat down on the couch opposite Draco. Neither of them spoke, and they both avoided looking at Draco. Draco began feeling a little irritated. What the bloody hell could they possibly want? Why couldn’t they just leave him alone?

Draco was about to leave the room himself when Hermione entered. Instead of sitting next to Ron or Ginny, Hermione went right over to Draco and sat next to him. Draco was quite aware that his mouth was hanging open, and he promptly shut it. He looked from Hermione to Ron and Ginny, and then back at Hermione. What was going on here?

“Malfoy,” Hermione started slowly, “what exactly did Harry say to you this morning?”

“That there was a lead and he was going somewhere with the Order.” How many times was he going to have to repeat himself?

“Is that all that happened?” Hermione asked.

Draco blushed, remembering how Harry had held him. “Yes,” Draco said, avoiding everyone’s eyes. “That’s all.”

Hermione gave him a very suspicious, look but she didn’t say anything.

“The reason we’re asking,” Ginny began. She was rubbing her hands together and appeared to be very anxious. This confused Draco exceedingly because he never thought of Ginny Weasley as the nervous type. “The reason we’re asking,” Ginny repeated, “is we don’t think Harry was supposed to go with the Order.”

“We’re not sure if they even know he’s with them,” Ron added. “They would have sent him back.”

Draco had suspected this might be the case. But how could the Oder possibly not know that Harry was there? It just didn’t make any sense. Not a lot was making sense to Draco these days.

“Are you sure he didn’t say anything else?” Hermione asked.

“He said nothing more,” Draco answered, shortly.

Ron got up from the couch and paced a couple of times back and forth before stopping and glaring at Draco.

“Why didn’t you stop him?” Ron said, angrily. “He’s going to get hurt! Why didn’t you stop him?”

“I tried!” Draco shouted, jumping up from the couch. “Don’t you know I tried?!” Draco was becoming hysterical. “He wouldn’t listen. I even offered to go with him, but he wouldn’t let me. There was nothing else that I could do!”

Hermione got up and hesitantly placed a hand on Draco’s shoulder. Draco calmed down a little, but he still was breathing heavily.

“We’re all worried about him,” Hermione said quietly. Draco nodded while privately thinking that ‘worried’ was a little bit of an understatement at the moment. Draco collapsed back down into the couch and buried his face in his hands. He was quite aware that everyone else in the room was watching him. He could feel their eyes on him.

“Malfoy—“ Ron started, but Draco cut him off.

“Please don’t,” Draco said; he looked up at Ron. “Please don’t try to make it better.”

Ron shut his mouth and nodded. Everyone was still. No one said a thing. They all just remained sitting for what seemed like days. Draco knew that everyone was thinking the same thing. Everyone was thinking, ‘What if Harry doesn’t come back?’ Draco propped his elbow on the arm of the couch and leaned his head into the palm of his hand. Draco stared vacantly at a spot on the rug. It was dark green, Slytherin’s color. Green—like Harry’s eyes. Picturing Harry’s eyes clearly in his mind, Draco drifted off.

~~~

When Draco next awoke, it was to the sound of voices speaking urgently. He sat up slowly, rubbing his stiff neck. When had he fallen asleep? How long had been out? Why hadn’t anyone awakened him? Draco yawned as he half listened to the voices.

“Take him upstairs, put him in his bed,” said one voice, which sounded like Molly Weasley.

“Careful with his head.” That was Lupin. “Gently, now.”

“Foolish Potter!” Draco distinctly heard Snape say. “Stupid, stupid boy. We don’t have a moment to lose. We need to reverse the effects of the curse, now!”

Draco was up in an instant, running out of the drawing room, bounding up the stairs and bursting into the room he shared with Harry. Lupin and Snape were settling Harry down in his bed. He was unconscious.

“Harry! Oh my god! Harry!” Draco screamed, trying to push his way through what seemed like a thousand Aurors to get to him.

“What is he doing here?” Snape growled. “Get him out of here!”

Draco was caught by Lupin, who threw his arms around Draco’s chest.

“Harry, Harry? Can you hear me? Open your eyes!”

“Dra—co…” Harry moaned.

“Let me go to him, please,” Draco begged, trying to fight his way out of Lupin’s clutches. Lupin was a lot stronger than he looked.

“You’ll be able to see him soon, Draco,” Lupin said kindly. Draco didn’t make any effort to move.

“Lupin, get him out!” Snape snarled.

“Tonks, please take him outside,” Lupin said.

Tonks nodded, taking Draco by the arm and pulling him out of the room. Once they were out of the room, Tonks closed the door and kept leading Draco along, down the stairs and into the kitchen. From there she opened the door to the backyard garden and pushed Draco through. It appeared that Tonks had taken Lupin’s request a little too literally, as they were completely outside the house. Draco wasn’t going to say anything, and really, if truth be known, it was rather nice to have some fresh air. He hadn’t been outside in days. Tonks guided Draco over to one of the stone benches by the wall and forced him to sit down. Draco did so without struggling, and he leaned his head against the wall. Tonks sat down next to him. She glanced at Draco but didn’t say anything.

Draco coughed a few times and rubbed his chest. All of this stress wasn’t helping him any.

“Tonks,” Draco said quietly. “Please tell me what happened.”

“Harry got hit by a curse,” Tonks said. She didn’t say anything else right away, which annoyed Draco greatly. He had figured that much out on his own. “We didn’t know he was with us,” Tonks continued. “He was wearing his invisibility cloak—we didn’t know.” Tears suddenly began running down Tonks’ face. Draco was taken aback and wasn’t sure what to do. It wasn’t the loud, obnoxious type of crying. No, this was the hollow, almost dead inside crying, and it scared Draco. “It was because of me,” Tonks whispered, trying to wipe the tears away. “We didn’t know he was there. I was in trouble and he tried to save me. He took the hit for me. I feel so guilty!”

Draco thought that he would have been angry if Harry got hurt because of someone else, but he didn’t feel that way. Instead, he just felt sick. Draco suddenly found himself in a different role. Now he was the one trying to console another. Slowly he reached him hand over to Tonks and laid it on her shoulder. He had always been shit at comforting other people. It’s wasn’t that he didn’t feel bad for them; he just always found that he didn’t know quite what to do. It always made him feel so damn awkward. Maybe there wasn’t much he could do, anyway. Maybe this was it.

Tonks wiped her eyes with the back of her hand and then took Draco’s hand in her own. She gave Draco a very sad smile. “You and I are cousins, you know,” she said.

Draco nodded. “I know.”

It was sad, really, that Draco had never previously had the chance to get to know Tonks better. He wondered what it would have been like. Draco and Tonks remained outside, sitting on the bench by the wall for what seemed like hours. Draco pondered what would happen to him if Harry died. He pondered his feelings for Harry, and then he pondered his life without him. Draco didn’t like what he saw. Harry had become a part of him before Draco had ever been aware. Feelings of worthlessness that had been buried inside of Draco for days suddenly reemerged. There was nothing in the world that he could do for Harry at the moment, and his own unimportance to someone who was so important to him sickened Draco. Beside him, Tonks gave a shaky sigh. She was just as bad off as he was. Draco knew how guilt could tear at the insides of a person until it drove them mad. Though he didn’t know what to say to make it better. Then Draco realized that this wasn’t the type of thing a few mere words could fix. Again, there was nothing Draco could do but sit and wait.

“Ahhhhh!” Draco screamed in frustration. Beside him, Tonks jumped.

“What’s the matter? Are you all right?” Tonks asked, urgently. She reached out her hand as if she was going to touch his shoulder, but she paused halfway.

“No!” Draco said, “I’m not all right! Harry could be up there dying, and I’m just sitting here doing nothing!” Draco buried his face into his knees.

Tonks hesitated for a moment before saying, “Draco, is there something going on between you and Harry?”

Draco sprang up in shock. He had known that Tonks suspected something, but her asking so bluntly completely caught him off guard. Gryffindors were so annoying that way. They were always so straight-forward and for the most part too nosey to live. Tonks could suspect all she wanted. She would never discover anything. There wasn’t anything to hide, anyway. Draco and Harry weren’t breaking any rules. Sure, they had been keeping the research they were doing quiet, but that didn’t mean anything.

“No,” Draco answered, a little too quickly. Damn! Now she was going to suspect more than ever. Damn his nerves! It was all Harry’s fault. If he had just stayed home he wouldn’t be hurt, and then Draco wouldn’t be in such an awkward situation. When Harry got better Draco was going to kick his arse! If he got better. Draco smacked the side of his head with his palm for thinking such a morbid thought. Tonks raised her eyebrows at him. Draco cleared his throat and gave her his most winning smile. “There’s nothing going on,” Draco said as smoothly as he could. Given the situation it wasn’t really smooth at all.

Tonks looked like she was about to say something when Lupin appeared in the doorway of the house. Draco jumped up and went over to him. Tonks followed half-heartedly as if she was afraid to know what had happened to Harry.

“Well?” Draco said, anxiously. “What happened? Is he all right?”

Lupin held up his hand. “Fine, fine,” Lupin said. “Everything’s fine. Harry will need to rest for a couple of days but he will be absolutely fine.”

“Oh, thank God,” Tonks said, sighing with relief.

“It’s a good thing Severus was here,” Lupin said, seriously. “I don’t know what would have happened without him.”

“Professor Snape?” Draco questioned. That’s right. Professor Snape had been the one who’d kicked him out of the bedroom. “Is he still here?”

“Yes,” Lupin said. “But I believe he was just about to leave.”

“It’s a good thing, too,” Tonks said. “He makes people uncomfortable the way he’s always—hey where are you going?”

Without a word Draco had sprinted into the house and to the front door. Snape was standing at the front door tucking his wand into his robes. Snape had not answered any of Draco’s letters and Draco was going to find out why.

“Professor!” Draco called, halting in front of him. Snape gave Draco a look that he might have given to a very small child who was begging him to play.

“Draco, I do not have the time for you at the moment,” Snape said.

“You haven’t answered any of my letters!” Draco said angrily.

“And there is good reason for that,” Snape replied.

“Where is my mother? I have a right to know! Tell me where she is!” Draco demanded.

“Your mother is fine,” Snape said. “I cannot tell you where she is; just know that she is safe.”

“Why can I not be with her?”

“It is too dangerous,” Snape replied, shortly.

“But—“

“Draco,” Snape said. “I risked a lot to get you out. The least you could do is trust me. You remember what it was like, do you not?” Draco’s eyes grew wide and he nodded. Yes, he remembered all too well what it had been like. “You wouldn’t want to be forced to go back, would you?” Draco shook his head wildly. No, that was about the last thing he wanted. “Then trust me. Stay put and don’t do anything rash, though I can hardly blame you if you did. I’m sure Potter is a bad influence.” Snape reached out and caught Draco’s chin in his hand, turning it to examine Draco’s left cheek. “The bruises have yet to fade, I see,” Snape commented, letting Draco go.

“It still hurts,” Draco admitted. “But it’s nothing compared to the aching of my heart.”

“Spare me!” Snape snapped. “You’re beginning to sound like the Potter brat.” Snape opened the door and was about to leave when he added, “If it gets worse tell one of the Order members and I’ll be notified, but for the love of Merlin, do NOT send any more letters. You seem to be determined to get us both killed.”

“Professor!” Draco cried as Snape was about to walk out. Snape stopped and turned back around. Draco raised his hand to his left cheek, running it over the bruise. Draco had hardly thought about himself in days. He had been too concerned about his mother. But now, when he stopped and thought about it, he was scared. “What will happen if you can’t--” Draco couldn’t finish the sentence. It frightened him too much.

Snape sighed and stepped back into the house, laying his hand on Draco’s shoulder. “Everything will be all right,” Snape assured him. “You have my word.” With nothing more, Snape left.

Draco sighed and sank down right there in the middle of the floor. He covered his eyes with his hand. This was too much to handle. Snape wouldn’t lie to him, right? His mother was really all right. And he, Draco, was going to be fine, too… right? Draco shook his head and stood up. He ought not to trouble himself over these questions right now. What should be on the top of his priorities was Harry. As fast as he could (without running), Draco made his way to the room he shared with Harry.

The lights were off in the room, but there was a candle burning on the nightstand which cast a flickering light over the beds. Draco shut the door quietly behind him. Harry appeared to be sleeping. Draco changed quickly into his nightclothes and sat down on his bed. It must have been at least three in the morning, yet Draco didn’t feel tired at all. Across the room Harry shifted a little, his eyes fluttering open. He tried to sit up but it was apparently too painful because he stopped after only one attempt. Draco got up and went to stand next to Harry’s bed. There were many things that Draco wanted to do at that moment. The first and foremost was yell at Harry for being so stupid. However, a different part of him wanted to cry and throw himself into Harry’s arms and never let go. There was also a very small part of him that wanted to give him a good, hard smack. But in the end, Draco did nothing but stand there and gape like a complete prat.

Harry smiled wearily when he saw Draco. “’Lo, Draco,” Harry murmured.

“Hello, Harry,” Draco returned. He really didn’t know what to do.

Harry reached out and grabbed Draco’s hand and pulled him over to sit on the bed. “Ya miss me?”

Draco had the sudden urge to cry. He was tired of crying. It seemed like he had cried far too much that day. “Idiot,” Draco choked, as he leaned over to bury his face in Harry’s shoulder.

Harry appeared to be exhausted. Either that, or he was extremely drugged from whatever medicine he had been given. Whatever the case, Draco didn’t care. He was only happy to be with Harry at that moment. So much had happened that day, and Draco was sure it was only the beginning. Even though Draco didn’t know what would happen next, he found himself not caring. In fact, he was barely thinking of the future at all.

Harry shifted and pulled Draco all the way into the bed, pulling the blankets over both of them. Draco tensed for a moment before relaxing and nestling closer to Harry. This was all right, wasn’t it? They both needed the comfort, so this was all right. It felt right to Draco so he supposed that it was. Then again, Draco had never felt like this before, so he wasn’t sure if it really was ‘right’… but it felt good… so it couldn’t be wrong. Draco settled down as he realized that Harry would most likely not remember any of this the next day.

“Just for tonight,” Draco decided to himself as he nestled his head deeper into Harry’s shoulder. “I’ll throw all caution to the wind, just for tonight. Just for tonight.”