sophiemarin [2014-07-23 14:50:36 +0000 UTC]

Overall

Vision

Originality

Technique

Impact

Sometimes the poems that push the boundaries of creativity are the simplest ones, and Trudy by saevuswinds, written in a variation of found poetry, is a clear example of this.

The poem begins with the speaker of the poem introducing their "mother", who is wholly unknown to the reader. Through the speaker's descriptions, the reader is allowed to form a tentative relationship with the "mother". This creates a sense of familiarity that draws the reader into the poem itself, as well as creating emotional ties between the aforementioned "mother" and the reader.

The deviant manages, as well, to weave an inexplicably melancholy tone throughout, with words such as "silence" and "nothing" evoking in the reader a sense of tragedy. The enjambment is a continuous feature that causes the poem to read almost like an epic, which only serves to enhance the mother's seeming role as a tragic figure. The last line, "she was captive", draws the poem to a quiet halt, causing the reader to perceive a finality in the mother's seemingly unavoidable fate, whatever it may be.

Although it may be viewed as too vague and conceptual by some, saevuswinds should be applauded for their creative use of the format of erasure poetry in Trudy, a difficult technique no matter the subject of the poem. Overall a nicely rounded poem, well done.

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

akrasiel [2014-07-25 17:11:47 +0000 UTC]

Erasure poetry is fun stuff. "lived with / silence" is a slight bit choppy but the rest flows well.

👍: 0 ⏩: 1