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sewerrat — Tricks Without Mirrors v4
Published: 2002-08-26 20:39:23 +0000 UTC; Views: 199; Favourites: 1; Downloads: 17
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Description
Tricks Without Mirrorsi am an effigy of you yesterday,
looking into the chasm
i am ready to hurt me
hurt you
my shapes and curves and destiny are all yours,
i wonder how my body
would appear at the bottom
frozen
think, imagine the sound echo when i crash
like comets there below
will you wake up half way
screaming?
we are the Bard's star-crossed lovers - Plato's too,
that's why i am you and yours
your burning falling star
reflect
i perambulate in your skin, hair and feet,
this transformation completes us
you see how i am you
but small?
so you don't like effigies,
how about a recording?
i am a recording of you yesterday,
replayed in the chasm
listen to the loneliness
of you.
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Comments: 6
Wow, this is amazing. You always have such great endings to your poems, and this is no exception. Gorgeous, magnificent, spectacular. I need a larger vocabulary. 
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Thank you! Poems seem unfinished to me without great endings, so I always try to make them different or profound.
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I like the structure, a single two syllable line at the end of each structure to slam the words home is really good.
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erm, forgot to vote. lost the rest of my comment as well.
This seems to me like a dark, hurtful love. Then again, isn't love anything but pain?
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