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Published: 2005-07-21 05:31:41 +0000 UTC; Views: 296; Favourites: 2; Downloads: 9
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Description
WhisperingThoughts flitter within the mind
Clouds floating in the breeze
No use running, nor trying to hide
The wind follows wherever I flee
Scenes that replay, words echo repeatedly
Lost within shadows of the past
Losing sight of what and who one is discriminately
Hoping to plummet to the ground at last
Where can I run to, where do I hide?
When even the wind whispers her name
Where did I turn astray, when did I fall to pieces sliding
Ever far away from whom I was, bathed within this pain
Slowly opening my eyes to what’s around me
I slowly started to regain what was mine
Wrapped in chains barbed with hate, as low as I could be
I had sunk to a new low; I had been lost within my mind
Pain and hate were merely a whisper upon my wind
Cast aloft in illusion, sinking slowly unto my shadow
Lost for an eternity within, ego refusing even to bend
Breaking into shards, internally bled within my very marrow
Slowly stretching limbs rarely used, spreading wings tattered and frayed
Sinking down upon my knees, praying for forgiveness from shallowness
Words cast astride, a mere whisper upon the winds of change
Can a man truly change from selfish needs to the needs of the spiritually spent?
So I am merely a whisper within the mind of all
Deluded with a need to be needed.
A spring laden breeze drying the sweat from your heart
And a summer wisp comforting all who are bleeding
Please forgive my past indiscretions of self-centered reality
Allow me to dust you off and pull you up
Or just take the time to lean upon me
A mere whisper of hope and healing free for all…
I’m sorry.
Forgiveness asked for
For forgiveness received
For being you and for being me.
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Comments: 10
ContessaDelaunay [2005-09-04 04:00:00 +0000 UTC]
Very powerful. and I hate to say it, but oh, so fitting.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
ShadowStrider In reply to ContessaDelaunay [2005-10-26 02:39:04 +0000 UTC]
I'm glad you enjoyed it though. *laughs* The funny thing is that it has been so long that i cannot remember what i have written. *laughs*
👍: 0 ⏩: 0
whitesilkrose101 [2005-09-02 18:58:27 +0000 UTC]
o.o *insert wise words here*....*insert praise here*....*faint here*
wow. So much said.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
ShadowStrider In reply to whitesilkrose101 [2005-10-26 02:57:02 +0000 UTC]
nice bunny. *laughs* *insert thanks here*
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
whitesilkrose101 In reply to ShadowStrider [2005-10-27 04:07:34 +0000 UTC]
thank you ^.^ I think he's pretty cute
*insert welcome here*
👍: 0 ⏩: 0
dragondaughter [2005-07-27 01:05:27 +0000 UTC]
there's a lot of imagery here...but but the beat does seem to be off at times...however it still comes together well
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
ShadowStrider In reply to dragondaughter [2005-08-02 05:15:02 +0000 UTC]
i've been in an off beat mode lately. *grins* i'm just losing my touch. *grins*
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
Wolfiekins [2005-07-21 05:33:49 +0000 UTC]
Your meter is a bit off at times... And it can be a bit cliche. However, it does have wonderful imagery is beautiful and crisp
-Vall
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
ShadowStrider In reply to Wolfiekins [2005-07-21 05:48:54 +0000 UTC]
thanks. I have yet to learn about meter and i think alot of my vocabulary is full of cliche. *laughs* I'm still really new to formal writings, and tend to write it as i think it. I have yet to master the revising phase. *laughs* thanks for the kind words and the hint to brush up upon meter research.
👍: 0 ⏩: 0
