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silentpixie — Silver Etches
Published: 2003-01-05 17:13:01 +0000 UTC; Views: 53; Favourites: 1; Downloads: 6
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Description
Not everyoneHas a wonderful
Story to tell
Perhaps their voice
Isn't trained to sing
But are you really listening?
It could be
That the time
In your life
Has consumed you
Too busy to
Hear their pretty tune.
So what do you walk for?
What do you see?
In the different people
That you meet
What would you do
If you met me?
What would I tell you?
Would I let a stranger know?
What would I whisper
As you carelessly let go
To all had before
And all you've been missing
Is everything you need
But everything that you're
Too blind to see...
You walk right by me.
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Comments: 3
Wow, because i love the whole idea of this.
Theres one thing that im going to suggest though
It could be
That the time
In your life
Is consumed by you
i would suggest you change it to
It could be
That the time
In your life
Has consumed you
just a thought!! Otherwise this is quite good! Well not quite, but WONDERFULLY good!
👍: 0 ⏩: 0
I don't think you need to change it, some of the best poetry is the most simple. I like it and I think the screen shot works well with it cause the poem talks about passing up someone own uniqueness and a unicorn is pretty damn unique.
👍: 0 ⏩: 0