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Sleeper-Desolate — Blue Eyes
Published: 2004-11-13 08:48:42 +0000 UTC; Views: 145; Favourites: 0; Downloads: 5
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Description
The docks are at their peakFilled to the brim and starting to leak
Bustling with disease and
Hustling with hopefull plans
I'm sinking into the unknown abyss
I know there must be more to this
And you're the one that keeps me waiting
Morning's come and gone
We've hardly stopped to admire the dawn
Though people rush by
Though people must die
I'm finding that change is necessary
To best this cunning advasary
And you're the one that keeps me trying
Midday draws ever near
The streets have not begun to clear
Crammed to the brink
Crammed to help sink
I'm feeling a need to be alone
Wishing I'd just stayed at home
And you're the one that keeps me here
Everything is slowing down
People are now returning to the town
Clearing out of this heartbreak
Clearing out with an earthquake
I know that I should follow the crowd
Leave and be overshadowed by a voice so loud
And you're the one that keeps me screaming
Night has fallen in this desolate park
Shadows entertain miscreants in the dark
Silencing with swift blows
Silencing with cheap shows
I know it's safer miles away
Where love is not special, just everyday
But you're the one that keeps me hoping
Midnight is upon this quiet place
In the still, somber moonlight I can feel your embrace
Feeling what I've waited for
Feeling what I need more
I know it's just a sweet charade
But in your perfect eyes heaven is made
And you're the one that keeps me waiting.
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Comments: 2
I love this. The structure of this poem is great. Really well done! I t's great how the first line of each stanza is describing a time of day and how the 3rd and 4th line of each stanza copies the first word (did that make sense?). Anyway this is awesome and it is no doubt the very very very (lots more very's) best poem/song that you have ever wrote. i would love to hear music to it. FAV+
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I was reading some older poems, ballad narrative poems, that were structrured sort of like this one. I really love that style... and I sort of tweaked it to make it my own. 
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