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Description

Mr. Kettleman, an American teaching English at a Japanese High School, was initially relieved that the Shrinking Virus happened to have struck only after school ended. Being infected with the instantaneous variant is never a good thing, but Mr. Kettleman counted his blessings and estimated that he had a 50% chance of making it to the relative safety of the teacher's lounge; a feat only possible because most of the students had already left for the day. So with this in mind, the tiny teacher started to run across his classroom floor, towards the exit. But just then, a giant leather pump crashed down right next to him, nearly obliterating his entire being in a fraction of a second. He had forgotten that Ichika was given detention earlier in the day, and she had come back for her punishment. Of course, Mr. Kettleman was in no position to discipline Ichika now. After recovering from this momentary shock, he continued running towards the exit; never quite able to shake the surreal feeling of just barely surviving an instantaneous and brutal death.

"She nearly squashed me like a bug," he kept saying to himself in disbelief over and over again.

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alternate version:

Description

Mr. Kettleman, an American teaching English at a Japanese High School, was initially relieved that the Shrinking Virus happened to have struck only after school ended. Being infected with the instantaneous variant is never a good thing, but Mr. Kettleman counted his blessings and estimated that he had a 50% chance of making it to the relative safety of the teacher's lounge; a feat only possible because most of the students had already left for the day. So with this in mind, the tiny teacher started to run across his classroom floor, towards the exit. But just then, a giant leather pump crashed down right next to him, nearly obliterating his entire being in a fraction of a second. He had forgotten that Ichika was given detention earlier in the day, and she had come back for her punishment. Of course, Mr. Kettleman was in no position to discipline Ichika now. After recovering from this momentary shock, he continued running towards the exit; never quite able to shake the surreal feeling of just barely surviving an instantaneous and brutal death.

"She nearly squashed me like a bug," he kept saying to himself in disbelief over and over again.

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alternate version: