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I was just talking to her, this girl who’s almost like a best friend. We spent the whole night talking about her. Well… That’s alright. She’s excited and happy about new prospects in her life. Of course, I’m glad for her. I hope she finds the happiness that she seeks. I’m glad too that she didn’t see the tear run down my cheek when she laughed and shared her excitement. As she chatted with me by my window, my thoughts wandered off and I thought of you. Looking out at the sky, so quiet and peaceful… I couldn’t help but think of you.

And now? She’s gone to sleep. I sit here alone, listening to the birds whistling, as I wait for sunrise and a new day to begin. Again, you’re in my thoughts.

You’re so far away and yet again you’re in my thoughts.

I know that nothing can come of this. All logic tells me that nothing can come of this. Every part of my brain seems to tell me that nothing will come of this, other than more heartache for me.

Come autumn, you will be away at school. You’ll be busy with your new life. There will be new projects, new experiences, and, yes, new men. (Well, hey? They don’t call Paris “the city of love” for nothing, right?) You’ll finally be free from family and hometown pressures and able to live your life more openly. You’ll be surrounded by handsome, tanned, dark-haired men that I can’t ever hope to compete with. They’ll take one look at your pretty face and maybe they’ll see the way your lips sometimes curl upwards when you smile or maybe they’ll see that soft brown colour in your eyes… And even if all those handsome men only see your pretty face… they’ll fall for you. And you will be completely lost to me. A thousand times over, you will be completely lost to me.

I know this.

Worse than that? I know that even now while you’re still at home, waiting for a new life to begin, I know I’m not really your first choice. I’m just some guy… some guy who’s supposed to be around whenever you’re down because that other guy isn’t attentive enough. Or maybe I’m just some guy to pass the time with? I’m not sure exactly, but I know I’m probably nothing more than that to you. And when autumn comes, even if you don’t forget about that other guy, I know you will probably forget about me completely.

I know this.

And still I can’t help it. It’s not because of how you look. Sure, you’re cute. There’s no arguing that. Everything from your mischievous smile, to those warm eyes that could melt anyone’s heart, to every little mole on your body that I’d kiss one by one if ever I’d have the chance… every little thing about how you look seems just right to me. But it’s not about that. Take all that away and you’d still be beautiful to me. Just by being yourself, you make me want to be a better person. You make me want a better life. I talk to you and sometimes… sometimes you make me see that everything in the world can be beautiful. Despite everything that has happened to me and everything that still haunts me every single day, you always find a way to touch my soul. Even as you break my heart, somehow you give me hope. So no, I can’t help it.

In spite of myself?

Je pense…

Je t’aime.

Description
I was just talking to her, this girl who’s almost like a best friend. We spent the whole night talking about her. Well… That’s alright. She’s excited and happy about new prospects in her life. Of course, I’m glad for her. I hope she finds the happiness that she seeks. I’m glad too that she didn’t see the tear run down my cheek when she laughed and shared her excitement. As she chatted with me by my window, my thoughts wandered off and I thought of you. Looking out at the sky, so quiet and peaceful… I couldn’t help but think of you.

And now? She’s gone to sleep. I sit here alone, listening to the birds whistling, as I wait for sunrise and a new day to begin. Again, you’re in my thoughts.

You’re so far away and yet again you’re in my thoughts.

I know that nothing can come of this. All logic tells me that nothing can come of this. Every part of my brain seems to tell me that nothing will come of this, other than more heartache for me.

Come autumn, you will be away at school. You’ll be busy with your new life. There will be new projects, new experiences, and, yes, new men. (Well, hey? They don’t call Paris “the city of love” for nothing, right?) You’ll finally be free from family and hometown pressures and able to live your life more openly. You’ll be surrounded by handsome, tanned, dark-haired men that I can’t ever hope to compete with. They’ll take one look at your pretty face and maybe they’ll see the way your lips sometimes curl upwards when you smile or maybe they’ll see that soft brown colour in your eyes… And even if all those handsome men only see your pretty face… they’ll fall for you. And you will be completely lost to me. A thousand times over, you will be completely lost to me.

I know this.

Worse than that? I know that even now while you’re still at home, waiting for a new life to begin, I know I’m not really your first choice. I’m just some guy… some guy who’s supposed to be around whenever you’re down because that other guy isn’t attentive enough. Or maybe I’m just some guy to pass the time with? I’m not sure exactly, but I know I’m probably nothing more than that to you. And when autumn comes, even if you don’t forget about that other guy, I know you will probably forget about me completely.

I know this.

And still I can’t help it. It’s not because of how you look. Sure, you’re cute. There’s no arguing that. Everything from your mischievous smile, to those warm eyes that could melt anyone’s heart, to every little mole on your body that I’d kiss one by one if ever I’d have the chance… every little thing about how you look seems just right to me. But it’s not about that. Take all that away and you’d still be beautiful to me. Just by being yourself, you make me want to be a better person. You make me want a better life. I talk to you and sometimes… sometimes you make me see that everything in the world can be beautiful. Despite everything that has happened to me and everything that still haunts me every single day, you always find a way to touch my soul. Even as you break my heart, somehow you give me hope. So no, I can’t help it.

In spite of myself?

Je pense…

Je t’aime.