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Description
Addy: A cream pelted teenage lioness wandered alone along the borders of the Mwanzo pride. The guards did not seem bothered by her presence; they had heard of what had happened to one of their own, Nishati, and they already knew the lioness, for she would often visit the pride. Even so, they stayed relatively away from her, knowing that the beginning of the incident was no more no less than herself. As far as they had heard, the lion Nishati had died fighting for a small freckled lioness. As true as that was, Adana could never forgive herself; she never meant to make him fight for her, she never meant for him to die. She loved Nishati as her own brother, and to her this was what he was. She knew it was mutual. But bit by bit, her heart shattered to pieces as she let herself drown into her sorrow, her once so lively and sparkly eyes now turning into a dull brown shade of some sort, making the blue in them almost invisible.

A wild spirit who once loved to explore the world and run free across the neverending plains, had now scattered, turning into one of fear, of extreme caution and of melancholy. It had only been a few days since the lions tried to abuse her and Nishati had died, but even so, her pain seemed everlasting. How come could something hurt her so? How much heavier could guilt and blame get, on her small, fragile shoulders?

She didn't want to go home. But she didn't want to be there either. Then again, what if those lions found her again? Adana couldn't stand the thought of being alone now, a thought she once wouldn't have minded, but would've rather loved, for adventures could be faced by a single lioness. Nonetheless, all of these thoughts, this entire mindset had been yanked off her naïve brain and it was as though the cub that lived within her, had been ripped off her chest.

Right there, right then, she was nothing but an empty shell. Walking, wandering, eyes lost in the wilderness, heading nowhere, anywhere. She couldn't live with that blame.

Inevitably, Addy wished it was her, instead of her friend, who had been taken off this world. Perhaps it would've been better to let those lions do as they wished to her, use their male bits on her as they said they would, and she would've endured it. If it meant keeping him alive... then she most definitely would've.

But as much as she desperately wished to go back in time, she could not.

Tattooed Lioness: Something in the air changed, things seemed to darken and die out rather rapidly. There was no wind to carry new scents to the teenager’s nose, everything was so utterly still, as if the world was worried that breathing too deeply would cause everything to crumble. It put a deep sense of fear into the pit of Falala’s gut, her meeting with the rogue Ming not too long ago had seemingly been eclipsed by the tragic passing of Nishati by a group of rogues. At first, she had been thankful for the distraction, she could keep her new crush a secret from everyone for a little longer. But now that this tense stillness had settled over everything she wished nothing more than to reverse what had happened, and it made her even less inclined to talk about her new rogue crush.

Everything appeared to be a mess, at least for now. Borders suddenly became much harder to cross and Falala had to settle for watching Ming from a distance while she waited for this all to calm down. Falala hadn’t heard the whole story properly, or at least she hadn’t internalised all of it and retained that it was her friend Addy who had been hunted by these rogues in the first place. So as she was following the line of the borders the last face she had expected to see was Addy, and then her face immediately lit up. ‘I can tell Addy about Ming! I’m sure she’d love to hear all about her!’ Falala decided, bounding towards the larger teen at a reasonable speed. Falala was the shorter of the two, but she made up for it in strength.

Falala hadn’t noticed the emptiness in Adana’s walk, the sheer lost image of it all. She didn’t notice until she was already too close, smile fading off her maw as she searched Addy’s eyes for that same blue that she’d found in Ming’s, but it was gone. Everything about Addy that Falala knew was gone, the happiness, the excitement, the brightness that seemed to stem from her soul and reach out to the world through her eyes and her freckled smile. “Addy?” Falala asked as she came to a rough halt before her friend, voice quiet and filled with genuine concern. Something was wrong, Falala didn’t know what yet, she hadn’t connected the dots. “Addy what’s wrong?” Falala asked, more urgently now, all thoughts of talking about Ming fled her mind as she looked at the husk her best friend had become. Wondering what on earth could have taken the light out of her friend’s soul, stolen the joy from her stride and removed that beautiful blue from her eyes.

Addy: The soul of the once ever so full of life explorer, that one remarkably wild spirited lioness, fled through her eyes along her tears and lost itself along the way over the course of the two last days. Adana's pace was slow, she headed nowhere. Yet she felt safe within the borders of Mwanzo; being home and seeing the look in her parent’s eyes would be no help at all. Not that being in Nishati's pride was. But at least she could have some time for herself, to think, to try to cling onto her essence and not let pain wash it all away.

She smelled someone familiar coming, she heard their steps. However, she did not feel intrigued by it; Adana hardly bothered to look. Until the sweet high-pitched voice reached her ears and brought a surge of life to her empty shell, she had no idea who that was. Nonetheless, seeing it was Falala, she felt her heart beat faster and suddenly she felt vulnerable, ears that once pinned up to hear her voice now flattened against her skull as the same frown slowly restored itself upon her face.

"Hey, Lala." She muttered, under her breath, almost inaudibly. She felt almost shy being this vulnerable in front of her friend; certainly they had grown up together and grown close like best friends would, but at this point in life Addy knew there was a slight difference in between how one feels about a friend and how one feels about... a special someone. She had hoped to see her before; in fact Addy had wanted to see her everyday, before all of this happened. She just had not, because... well, she didn't want to come across as clingy. She didn't wish to bother, or to be on her way. Though it was no surprise to anyone that the way Addy noticed how her pelt was so uniquely fitting to her, and the way she loved the green shade that were her eyes and how her fluffy curls on the top of her head curled to one side slightly more than the other. Everything about it, everything about her was... breathtakingly beautiful.

Yet she had not ever spoken a word about it, to anyone. She couldn't bring herself to be as honest and as open as she was before. It was as though all the courage and the leadership Addy had when they played as cubs, all of it, faded to dust. But not because of the incident... simply because Addy had grown into a shy, low self esteemed teen whose confidence and certainty in words were always second guessed by her own self. Insecurity began when she learned she was adopted; certainly her parents didn't mean to give her siblings more attention than they did to her. But eventually they did, cubs demanded attention and she knew it. She wouldn't want to get on their way.

Although it crushed her.

Now, after this, feeling the guilt that weighed on her shoulders of the death of a dear friend, one that was like a brother to her, it was no wonder she felt... nothing. And everything. At the same time.

"I.. did some bad things." She finally replied to her friend, after spending almost a minute in silence, staring at her paws. "Things I can't fix now. But.. nevermind about it, I.. should probably go now."

Tattooed Lioness: Something was off, Falala could tell that much, the way that Addy had reacted to her approach showed that something was up. So the small lioness did her best to sit perfectly still and hear Addy’s voice as she started to talk, despite the stillness of the rest of the world it was still almost like there was a thousand noises getting between Addy’s voice and her own ears. After she said a quiet hello Falala offered her a soft smile, “It’s good to see you again Addy, it’s been a while. Have you been okay? Everything alright at home?” Falala asked with genuine concern, and also honest curiosity, there was so little that Falala knew about Addy’s life when she wasn’t in Mwanzo. Almost any information that Addy would provide her would be new information, especially with the border situation.

Alarm bells didn’t start to ring until the next things that came from Adana’s mouth were words she never expected to hear, her own ears falling back in concern and worry. Falala didn’t know what to say, too many things rushed through her head at once, none of them seemed like the right thing to say. Her heart hammered in her chest, hurting for the way those words were spoken. Something was deeply wrong. But as Adana suggested leaving Falala burst back into life, panic rising to her throat as she spoke. “NO! Don’t go!” Falala cried, despite neither of them having moved much since the conversation began. “Don’t leave, I want to help, I want to know what’s wrong. What happened? What did you do? I’m sure there’s a way you can fix it, we could fix it together even.” Ever the optimist, Falala didn’t realise the fault in her line of questioning, she certainly didn’t see the negative ramifications of what she had just suggested. She just wanted Addy to feel okay, to not look quite so sad and so lost.

Despite being smaller, Falala moved closer and nuzzled Addy’s fluffy neck. Offering some light purring to try and calm the situation, she just wanted everything to be alright. Falala wanted to comfort Addy in any way she possibly could, hugs, talking, listening, anything. Falala knew she would do anything to make sure Addy was happy, she’d even turn back time if she knew the reason why Addy was so distraught. But for now, she simply offered her soft plush body to cuddle with, sure she was all muscle under that but the soft fluffiness of her pelt had remained to her teen years. “It’ll be alright Addy, I promise, it’ll all be alright in the end.” Falala spoke softer now, in a voice that was laced with care and a certain kind of love. Falala was more than a little protective of those closest to her, and she was slowly deciding in her mind to never leave Addy’s side until this problem was solved. She never wanted to see Addy so upset ever again.

Addy: Adana's heartbeat grew faster by every step she saw Falala take towards her. It was almost like she panicked for having her, of all lions, this close, because she actually meant something more to her. Not that she knew it, but Addy did, and it had her out of breath by the time she felt her friend's cold nose tip nuzzle into her neck. Immediately, however, she leaned into her touch; perhaps... perhaps this meant she felt it too? Or was she being silly and imagining things? There was no way one could tell from a simple nuzzle, right? After all, they had been cuddlier than that as cubs. Perhaps it was no more than a simple, friendly comforting gesture.

Wrapping her paws around Falala she pulled her into a tight embrace, trying to keep her balance on her hind legs but holding her fluffy friend closely, nuzzling into her forehead, purring ever so faintly. She didn't want to remember what had happened to her, she didn't want Falala to know the wrong she had done. No, all she wanted as to forget all of it and pretend it was all a bad dream, and stay right where she was, with Lala, just the way she was. Taking in her scent, getting to touch her after what felt like so long, it all had her feeling almost happy for the first time since what had happened.

But reality was tragic. Someone had died because of her, and as much as she wanted to, she couldn't simply ignore that.

She held a bit tighter onto Falala once she felt tears fill her eyes and a lump begin to form in her throat. Addy had cried enough by now, a million times over; she didn't want to cry again... now she felt not sad, but numb. And it was over numbness that she mourned. How dare her feel numb about this?

"There's no way to fix it, Lala." Slowly, her grip loosened around the other lioness, her arms slipping and returning to rest on the floor, as her gaze left to somewhere unknown. "I.. I got Nishati killed. He died because of me. And now I have to live with that." She said, ever so quietly, close to whispering. "I should've let them.. I should've let them do what they wanted... m-maybe then. Then Ni would be alive."

Tattooed Lioness: Addy seemed to relax into her nuzzle and it gave Falala some hope that things were going to be okay, that Addy could be calmed down from whatever was going wrong and that things could be solved. Falala even giggled lightly at the strong hug Addy gave her, even the purring made her happier. Her fluff blending into Addy’s soft fur with ease, and her own laughing body seemed to fit so well in her friends embrace. Falala hadn’t noticed Addy starting to cry, she hadn’t noticed her friend’s distress until Addy released her.

Mint eyes went wide and her ears fell back as she started to listen to Addy talk. Nishati was dead, and Addy thought she was to blame. Falala couldn’t understand how that all connected, but it was crushing her heart to hear her friend talk like this. “N...No. Nishati died because of rogues, he died...he...” Falala tried to reason with herself but all the pieces started to slide together in her mind, and it immediately felt like she’d been punched in the heart and gut.

With barely a chance to process that part of the revelation, Addy started rambling off on a far more important tangent. Falala shook her head violently, tears brimming in her minty eyes. “NO! It wouldn’t have mattered Addy! They would have followed you home, they could have killed you too, then Nishati would’ve been dead as well as you and I could never live with that.” Falala blurted out, loudly for once but her voice was still beyond soft in tone. “You...I...Y...” Falala tried to keep talking but all the words seemed to be caught inside her throat, so instead she threw herself at her friend. Pushing her head under Addy’s, trying to raise it from staring at the ground and getting herself as close to the bigger lioness as possible. She just wanted to hug Addy until nothing hurt anymore, until everything didn’t matter.

Addy: The freckled lioness found comfort in Falala's embrace, but at the same time she felt reluctant. She was fragile, vulnerable, and relying on her one sided love for her best friend would be the worst of her options right now. Although she hadn't heard it from Falala yet, for some reason deep inside she knew... the way she spoke to her, looked at her, it just wasn't mutual. Lala's eyes didn't sparkle at the sight of Addy, not like hers did. Her heart didn't beat any faster. She may not know much about love, but she had come to learn what mutuality was about.

Naturally it only felt like she sunk ever deeper in the dark pit of sorrow she caught herself in. But making her friend worry would do them no good. It was enough... she had spoken of her trauma enough times in such a short amount of time, she did not wish to relive it. So she gently patted Falala's shoulders, letting her know she could let go, to then gently pull away from her arms.

"Thank you, Lala." She mumbled, forcing out a smile. Her gaze was empty, dull, yet if she tried hard enough she could fake it well. Lying was not one of her strengths, but she could pull it off with some effort. "Enough about me.. How have you been? I haven't.. seen you in a while. I've actually come looking for you a few times in the last weeks but I couldn't find you. Have you been travelling around?"

Tattooed Lioness: The hug lasted a while but Falala could tell there was something to empty about it, like the essence of Addy had slowly faded out of it, and Falala didn’t know why and it only made her more concerned. Her stomach twisted and churned at the way Addy was acting, it was so foreign and broken, so little of the Addy who had been a lava queen when they were cubs. The mumbled thanks seemed just as empty as her gaze, a dullness that seemed to take over her whole body and spirit. Falala’s own mint eyes were filled with emotion, she was sad and scared and full of everything in-between. “Oh Addy I’m so sorry. I’m always here if you need someone to hug or listen, but if you don’t want to that’s fine too. But I’m here for you, in any way you need it.” Falala put an offer out there, she wasn’t sure what Addy needed right now but she knew she was more than willing to give her any kind of support that she needed.

The topic seemed to shift to her instead and Falala suddenly felt more sick, any of the excitement that had bubbled away in her stomach at telling Addy about Ming had turned into festering anxiety. Her eyes darted around a little, trying to avoid the eyes she’d known since cubhood. The eyes that had once been beautifully blue, but now seemed to be far more brown, the very thing she loved about those eyes seemed to have been stolen by the event that had left her friend so broken. “I’ve been...fine.” Falala drew her sentence out, trying to delay the talk about Ming. “I’ve been trying to see a bit of life outside the Mwanzo borders, you know, see if I’m missing anything.” Falala laughed awkwardly, trying to avoid talking too much about herself. Her life had been so much better than Addy’s lately, it seemed wrong of her to talk about her rather comfy, happy life. “I met a rogue, she told me about cheetahs and I heard about lands that aren’t like Mwanzo, it was really...interesting.” Falala ended, taking a breath in and holding it, Addy’s response to that last part would matter the most. She hadn’t mentioned Ming yet, maybe she could get away with not mentioning her newest crush.

Addy: Her attention rested solemnly on hee friend's beautiful face, her voice becoming all she heard. It was then that Adana realized how much she had missed Falala, just spending time with her was something she loved so much, no matter what they were doing. She was most definitely her favourite friend, along with Gambia and Kui, but she hadn't seen the other two lately either. How come she had let them grow so distant? She felt as though there was a cub in her, trapped into a late teenager's body, ready to flourish into an adult that knew much too little about adulthood and that did not want to grow. All the friends she made during cubhood, all she knew... she wanted to preserve it all. It was sacred to her, more dear than anything.

"A rogue?" She asked with a faint smile, sitting down before Falala and looking down at her. "That sounds awesome... are they nice?"

Naturally not all rogues had to be bad, there were some good ones too. Her mother Mpingo was a nice rogue, her dad had grown up as a rogue too and he was the best dad in the world. She knew she couldn't be biased... one of her many dreams as a cub was to become a rogue, so she could explore the world and know all about it.

Now, however, she felt afraid. But hopefully that feeling wouldn't last forever...

"How is it outside Mwanzo? Is the world as amazingly interesting as we used to picture?" She asked softly. While speaking, she couldn't help but realize how truly gorgeous Falala's eyes were, and how easy it could be to get lost in them... such a unique colour, and the patterns that her fur held added to her beauty greatly. She, as a whole, was breathtaking.

"Hey Lala. Do you... by any chance... like someone? As in, like like? More than friends.."

Tattooed Lioness: The tan lioness had stood awkwardly waiting for Addy to start talking again, hopefully about herself, but the lighter lioness seemed content with keeping the interaction moving slowly. Which she would normally be totally okay with, but right now it was making her nervous. Falala sat down as well, mirroring Addy’s pose but without the empty posture. Falala looked away again for a moment as Addy brought up the rogue, thinking back to Ming she found herself smiling through her nerves. “Yeah, a rogue, one that came from a land far away from here.” Falala started, finding herself getting caught up in the conversation, at least talking and thinking about Ming was pleasant. “Oh she was very nice, we talked for a really long time. She told me about the lands she’d seen, all the different trees, and about cheetahs!” Falala tried her best to be excited but images flashed before her of the things that had been whispered about Nishati, and of what the rogues had done to him. Falala couldn’t imagine Ming doing such a thing, and she hoped just then that Ming was safe and as far away from those rogues as she could be. “You don’t...you don’t mind me talking about it do you?” Falala asked quietly, she needed to be reassured that it was fine to talk about her new rogue crush in front of Addy. After everything that had happened Falala wasn’t sure it was appropriate, or at least not the right time.

Addy kept talking and Falala giggled at her question, thinking back to what they thought the world would be like when they were kids. “Oh its better, at least I think so, it seems to be full of stuff I haven’t even thought of yet. I hope one day we can see it.” Falala spoke in her light soft voice, unaware that Addy was busy getting lost in her eyes. Her mind was too focused on all the interesting things Ming had told her about the land beyond Mwanzo, of the different trees and animals she hadn’t even heard of. It was all exciting, and she hoped that one day Ming, Addy and her could all go together and see it. “Who knows, we could even find a real volcano one day and be real lava queens.” Falala added, smiling softly at her friend, hoping that this talk would cheer her up a little.

Then the topic shifted and her smile fell, her eyes darted around for a moment before resting on Addy’s blue and brown eyes. The very eyes she had always found so striking before. They hadn’t changed but Falala no longer saw them in the same way. Falala shuffled her paws slightly, thinking of how to answer. “I...I uh, maybe?” Falala stumbled through a very vague answer. “Why? Do you?” Falala asked, realising slowly that it was probably why she had asked. A little spark of excitement ignited in her chest, “If you do I wanna know everything about them, they have to be great, only the best for the lava queen of the savannah.” Falala half teased, unaware of where this line of conversation was going to lead.

Description
Addy: A cream pelted teenage lioness wandered alone along the borders of the Mwanzo pride. The guards did not seem bothered by her presence; they had heard of what had happened to one of their own, Nishati, and they already knew the lioness, for she would often visit the pride. Even so, they stayed relatively away from her, knowing that the beginning of the incident was no more no less than herself. As far as they had heard, the lion Nishati had died fighting for a small freckled lioness. As true as that was, Adana could never forgive herself; she never meant to make him fight for her, she never meant for him to die. She loved Nishati as her own brother, and to her this was what he was. She knew it was mutual. But bit by bit, her heart shattered to pieces as she let herself drown into her sorrow, her once so lively and sparkly eyes now turning into a dull brown shade of some sort, making the blue in them almost invisible.

A wild spirit who once loved to explore the world and run free across the neverending plains, had now scattered, turning into one of fear, of extreme caution and of melancholy. It had only been a few days since the lions tried to abuse her and Nishati had died, but even so, her pain seemed everlasting. How come could something hurt her so? How much heavier could guilt and blame get, on her small, fragile shoulders?

She didn't want to go home. But she didn't want to be there either. Then again, what if those lions found her again? Adana couldn't stand the thought of being alone now, a thought she once wouldn't have minded, but would've rather loved, for adventures could be faced by a single lioness. Nonetheless, all of these thoughts, this entire mindset had been yanked off her naïve brain and it was as though the cub that lived within her, had been ripped off her chest.

Right there, right then, she was nothing but an empty shell. Walking, wandering, eyes lost in the wilderness, heading nowhere, anywhere. She couldn't live with that blame.

Inevitably, Addy wished it was her, instead of her friend, who had been taken off this world. Perhaps it would've been better to let those lions do as they wished to her, use their male bits on her as they said they would, and she would've endured it. If it meant keeping him alive... then she most definitely would've.

But as much as she desperately wished to go back in time, she could not.

Tattooed Lioness: Something in the air changed, things seemed to darken and die out rather rapidly. There was no wind to carry new scents to the teenager’s nose, everything was so utterly still, as if the world was worried that breathing too deeply would cause everything to crumble. It put a deep sense of fear into the pit of Falala’s gut, her meeting with the rogue Ming not too long ago had seemingly been eclipsed by the tragic passing of Nishati by a group of rogues. At first, she had been thankful for the distraction, she could keep her new crush a secret from everyone for a little longer. But now that this tense stillness had settled over everything she wished nothing more than to reverse what had happened, and it made her even less inclined to talk about her new rogue crush.

Everything appeared to be a mess, at least for now. Borders suddenly became much harder to cross and Falala had to settle for watching Ming from a distance while she waited for this all to calm down. Falala hadn’t heard the whole story properly, or at least she hadn’t internalised all of it and retained that it was her friend Addy who had been hunted by these rogues in the first place. So as she was following the line of the borders the last face she had expected to see was Addy, and then her face immediately lit up. ‘I can tell Addy about Ming! I’m sure she’d love to hear all about her!’ Falala decided, bounding towards the larger teen at a reasonable speed. Falala was the shorter of the two, but she made up for it in strength.

Falala hadn’t noticed the emptiness in Adana’s walk, the sheer lost image of it all. She didn’t notice until she was already too close, smile fading off her maw as she searched Addy’s eyes for that same blue that she’d found in Ming’s, but it was gone. Everything about Addy that Falala knew was gone, the happiness, the excitement, the brightness that seemed to stem from her soul and reach out to the world through her eyes and her freckled smile. “Addy?” Falala asked as she came to a rough halt before her friend, voice quiet and filled with genuine concern. Something was wrong, Falala didn’t know what yet, she hadn’t connected the dots. “Addy what’s wrong?” Falala asked, more urgently now, all thoughts of talking about Ming fled her mind as she looked at the husk her best friend had become. Wondering what on earth could have taken the light out of her friend’s soul, stolen the joy from her stride and removed that beautiful blue from her eyes.

Addy: The soul of the once ever so full of life explorer, that one remarkably wild spirited lioness, fled through her eyes along her tears and lost itself along the way over the course of the two last days. Adana's pace was slow, she headed nowhere. Yet she felt safe within the borders of Mwanzo; being home and seeing the look in her parent’s eyes would be no help at all. Not that being in Nishati's pride was. But at least she could have some time for herself, to think, to try to cling onto her essence and not let pain wash it all away.

She smelled someone familiar coming, she heard their steps. However, she did not feel intrigued by it; Adana hardly bothered to look. Until the sweet high-pitched voice reached her ears and brought a surge of life to her empty shell, she had no idea who that was. Nonetheless, seeing it was Falala, she felt her heart beat faster and suddenly she felt vulnerable, ears that once pinned up to hear her voice now flattened against her skull as the same frown slowly restored itself upon her face.

"Hey, Lala." She muttered, under her breath, almost inaudibly. She felt almost shy being this vulnerable in front of her friend; certainly they had grown up together and grown close like best friends would, but at this point in life Addy knew there was a slight difference in between how one feels about a friend and how one feels about... a special someone. She had hoped to see her before; in fact Addy had wanted to see her everyday, before all of this happened. She just had not, because... well, she didn't want to come across as clingy. She didn't wish to bother, or to be on her way. Though it was no surprise to anyone that the way Addy noticed how her pelt was so uniquely fitting to her, and the way she loved the green shade that were her eyes and how her fluffy curls on the top of her head curled to one side slightly more than the other. Everything about it, everything about her was... breathtakingly beautiful.

Yet she had not ever spoken a word about it, to anyone. She couldn't bring herself to be as honest and as open as she was before. It was as though all the courage and the leadership Addy had when they played as cubs, all of it, faded to dust. But not because of the incident... simply because Addy had grown into a shy, low self esteemed teen whose confidence and certainty in words were always second guessed by her own self. Insecurity began when she learned she was adopted; certainly her parents didn't mean to give her siblings more attention than they did to her. But eventually they did, cubs demanded attention and she knew it. She wouldn't want to get on their way.

Although it crushed her.

Now, after this, feeling the guilt that weighed on her shoulders of the death of a dear friend, one that was like a brother to her, it was no wonder she felt... nothing. And everything. At the same time.

"I.. did some bad things." She finally replied to her friend, after spending almost a minute in silence, staring at her paws. "Things I can't fix now. But.. nevermind about it, I.. should probably go now."

Tattooed Lioness: Something was off, Falala could tell that much, the way that Addy had reacted to her approach showed that something was up. So the small lioness did her best to sit perfectly still and hear Addy’s voice as she started to talk, despite the stillness of the rest of the world it was still almost like there was a thousand noises getting between Addy’s voice and her own ears. After she said a quiet hello Falala offered her a soft smile, “It’s good to see you again Addy, it’s been a while. Have you been okay? Everything alright at home?” Falala asked with genuine concern, and also honest curiosity, there was so little that Falala knew about Addy’s life when she wasn’t in Mwanzo. Almost any information that Addy would provide her would be new information, especially with the border situation.

Alarm bells didn’t start to ring until the next things that came from Adana’s mouth were words she never expected to hear, her own ears falling back in concern and worry. Falala didn’t know what to say, too many things rushed through her head at once, none of them seemed like the right thing to say. Her heart hammered in her chest, hurting for the way those words were spoken. Something was deeply wrong. But as Adana suggested leaving Falala burst back into life, panic rising to her throat as she spoke. “NO! Don’t go!” Falala cried, despite neither of them having moved much since the conversation began. “Don’t leave, I want to help, I want to know what’s wrong. What happened? What did you do? I’m sure there’s a way you can fix it, we could fix it together even.” Ever the optimist, Falala didn’t realise the fault in her line of questioning, she certainly didn’t see the negative ramifications of what she had just suggested. She just wanted Addy to feel okay, to not look quite so sad and so lost.

Despite being smaller, Falala moved closer and nuzzled Addy’s fluffy neck. Offering some light purring to try and calm the situation, she just wanted everything to be alright. Falala wanted to comfort Addy in any way she possibly could, hugs, talking, listening, anything. Falala knew she would do anything to make sure Addy was happy, she’d even turn back time if she knew the reason why Addy was so distraught. But for now, she simply offered her soft plush body to cuddle with, sure she was all muscle under that but the soft fluffiness of her pelt had remained to her teen years. “It’ll be alright Addy, I promise, it’ll all be alright in the end.” Falala spoke softer now, in a voice that was laced with care and a certain kind of love. Falala was more than a little protective of those closest to her, and she was slowly deciding in her mind to never leave Addy’s side until this problem was solved. She never wanted to see Addy so upset ever again.

Addy: Adana's heartbeat grew faster by every step she saw Falala take towards her. It was almost like she panicked for having her, of all lions, this close, because she actually meant something more to her. Not that she knew it, but Addy did, and it had her out of breath by the time she felt her friend's cold nose tip nuzzle into her neck. Immediately, however, she leaned into her touch; perhaps... perhaps this meant she felt it too? Or was she being silly and imagining things? There was no way one could tell from a simple nuzzle, right? After all, they had been cuddlier than that as cubs. Perhaps it was no more than a simple, friendly comforting gesture.

Wrapping her paws around Falala she pulled her into a tight embrace, trying to keep her balance on her hind legs but holding her fluffy friend closely, nuzzling into her forehead, purring ever so faintly. She didn't want to remember what had happened to her, she didn't want Falala to know the wrong she had done. No, all she wanted as to forget all of it and pretend it was all a bad dream, and stay right where she was, with Lala, just the way she was. Taking in her scent, getting to touch her after what felt like so long, it all had her feeling almost happy for the first time since what had happened.

But reality was tragic. Someone had died because of her, and as much as she wanted to, she couldn't simply ignore that.

She held a bit tighter onto Falala once she felt tears fill her eyes and a lump begin to form in her throat. Addy had cried enough by now, a million times over; she didn't want to cry again... now she felt not sad, but numb. And it was over numbness that she mourned. How dare her feel numb about this?

"There's no way to fix it, Lala." Slowly, her grip loosened around the other lioness, her arms slipping and returning to rest on the floor, as her gaze left to somewhere unknown. "I.. I got Nishati killed. He died because of me. And now I have to live with that." She said, ever so quietly, close to whispering. "I should've let them.. I should've let them do what they wanted... m-maybe then. Then Ni would be alive."

Tattooed Lioness: Addy seemed to relax into her nuzzle and it gave Falala some hope that things were going to be okay, that Addy could be calmed down from whatever was going wrong and that things could be solved. Falala even giggled lightly at the strong hug Addy gave her, even the purring made her happier. Her fluff blending into Addy’s soft fur with ease, and her own laughing body seemed to fit so well in her friends embrace. Falala hadn’t noticed Addy starting to cry, she hadn’t noticed her friend’s distress until Addy released her.

Mint eyes went wide and her ears fell back as she started to listen to Addy talk. Nishati was dead, and Addy thought she was to blame. Falala couldn’t understand how that all connected, but it was crushing her heart to hear her friend talk like this. “N...No. Nishati died because of rogues, he died...he...” Falala tried to reason with herself but all the pieces started to slide together in her mind, and it immediately felt like she’d been punched in the heart and gut.

With barely a chance to process that part of the revelation, Addy started rambling off on a far more important tangent. Falala shook her head violently, tears brimming in her minty eyes. “NO! It wouldn’t have mattered Addy! They would have followed you home, they could have killed you too, then Nishati would’ve been dead as well as you and I could never live with that.” Falala blurted out, loudly for once but her voice was still beyond soft in tone. “You...I...Y...” Falala tried to keep talking but all the words seemed to be caught inside her throat, so instead she threw herself at her friend. Pushing her head under Addy’s, trying to raise it from staring at the ground and getting herself as close to the bigger lioness as possible. She just wanted to hug Addy until nothing hurt anymore, until everything didn’t matter.

Addy: The freckled lioness found comfort in Falala's embrace, but at the same time she felt reluctant. She was fragile, vulnerable, and relying on her one sided love for her best friend would be the worst of her options right now. Although she hadn't heard it from Falala yet, for some reason deep inside she knew... the way she spoke to her, looked at her, it just wasn't mutual. Lala's eyes didn't sparkle at the sight of Addy, not like hers did. Her heart didn't beat any faster. She may not know much about love, but she had come to learn what mutuality was about.

Naturally it only felt like she sunk ever deeper in the dark pit of sorrow she caught herself in. But making her friend worry would do them no good. It was enough... she had spoken of her trauma enough times in such a short amount of time, she did not wish to relive it. So she gently patted Falala's shoulders, letting her know she could let go, to then gently pull away from her arms.

"Thank you, Lala." She mumbled, forcing out a smile. Her gaze was empty, dull, yet if she tried hard enough she could fake it well. Lying was not one of her strengths, but she could pull it off with some effort. "Enough about me.. How have you been? I haven't.. seen you in a while. I've actually come looking for you a few times in the last weeks but I couldn't find you. Have you been travelling around?"

Tattooed Lioness: The hug lasted a while but Falala could tell there was something to empty about it, like the essence of Addy had slowly faded out of it, and Falala didn’t know why and it only made her more concerned. Her stomach twisted and churned at the way Addy was acting, it was so foreign and broken, so little of the Addy who had been a lava queen when they were cubs. The mumbled thanks seemed just as empty as her gaze, a dullness that seemed to take over her whole body and spirit. Falala’s own mint eyes were filled with emotion, she was sad and scared and full of everything in-between. “Oh Addy I’m so sorry. I’m always here if you need someone to hug or listen, but if you don’t want to that’s fine too. But I’m here for you, in any way you need it.” Falala put an offer out there, she wasn’t sure what Addy needed right now but she knew she was more than willing to give her any kind of support that she needed.

The topic seemed to shift to her instead and Falala suddenly felt more sick, any of the excitement that had bubbled away in her stomach at telling Addy about Ming had turned into festering anxiety. Her eyes darted around a little, trying to avoid the eyes she’d known since cubhood. The eyes that had once been beautifully blue, but now seemed to be far more brown, the very thing she loved about those eyes seemed to have been stolen by the event that had left her friend so broken. “I’ve been...fine.” Falala drew her sentence out, trying to delay the talk about Ming. “I’ve been trying to see a bit of life outside the Mwanzo borders, you know, see if I’m missing anything.” Falala laughed awkwardly, trying to avoid talking too much about herself. Her life had been so much better than Addy’s lately, it seemed wrong of her to talk about her rather comfy, happy life. “I met a rogue, she told me about cheetahs and I heard about lands that aren’t like Mwanzo, it was really...interesting.” Falala ended, taking a breath in and holding it, Addy’s response to that last part would matter the most. She hadn’t mentioned Ming yet, maybe she could get away with not mentioning her newest crush.

Addy: Her attention rested solemnly on hee friend's beautiful face, her voice becoming all she heard. It was then that Adana realized how much she had missed Falala, just spending time with her was something she loved so much, no matter what they were doing. She was most definitely her favourite friend, along with Gambia and Kui, but she hadn't seen the other two lately either. How come she had let them grow so distant? She felt as though there was a cub in her, trapped into a late teenager's body, ready to flourish into an adult that knew much too little about adulthood and that did not want to grow. All the friends she made during cubhood, all she knew... she wanted to preserve it all. It was sacred to her, more dear than anything.

"A rogue?" She asked with a faint smile, sitting down before Falala and looking down at her. "That sounds awesome... are they nice?"

Naturally not all rogues had to be bad, there were some good ones too. Her mother Mpingo was a nice rogue, her dad had grown up as a rogue too and he was the best dad in the world. She knew she couldn't be biased... one of her many dreams as a cub was to become a rogue, so she could explore the world and know all about it.

Now, however, she felt afraid. But hopefully that feeling wouldn't last forever...

"How is it outside Mwanzo? Is the world as amazingly interesting as we used to picture?" She asked softly. While speaking, she couldn't help but realize how truly gorgeous Falala's eyes were, and how easy it could be to get lost in them... such a unique colour, and the patterns that her fur held added to her beauty greatly. She, as a whole, was breathtaking.

"Hey Lala. Do you... by any chance... like someone? As in, like like? More than friends.."

Tattooed Lioness: The tan lioness had stood awkwardly waiting for Addy to start talking again, hopefully about herself, but the lighter lioness seemed content with keeping the interaction moving slowly. Which she would normally be totally okay with, but right now it was making her nervous. Falala sat down as well, mirroring Addy’s pose but without the empty posture. Falala looked away again for a moment as Addy brought up the rogue, thinking back to Ming she found herself smiling through her nerves. “Yeah, a rogue, one that came from a land far away from here.” Falala started, finding herself getting caught up in the conversation, at least talking and thinking about Ming was pleasant. “Oh she was very nice, we talked for a really long time. She told me about the lands she’d seen, all the different trees, and about cheetahs!” Falala tried her best to be excited but images flashed before her of the things that had been whispered about Nishati, and of what the rogues had done to him. Falala couldn’t imagine Ming doing such a thing, and she hoped just then that Ming was safe and as far away from those rogues as she could be. “You don’t...you don’t mind me talking about it do you?” Falala asked quietly, she needed to be reassured that it was fine to talk about her new rogue crush in front of Addy. After everything that had happened Falala wasn’t sure it was appropriate, or at least not the right time.

Addy kept talking and Falala giggled at her question, thinking back to what they thought the world would be like when they were kids. “Oh its better, at least I think so, it seems to be full of stuff I haven’t even thought of yet. I hope one day we can see it.” Falala spoke in her light soft voice, unaware that Addy was busy getting lost in her eyes. Her mind was too focused on all the interesting things Ming had told her about the land beyond Mwanzo, of the different trees and animals she hadn’t even heard of. It was all exciting, and she hoped that one day Ming, Addy and her could all go together and see it. “Who knows, we could even find a real volcano one day and be real lava queens.” Falala added, smiling softly at her friend, hoping that this talk would cheer her up a little.

Then the topic shifted and her smile fell, her eyes darted around for a moment before resting on Addy’s blue and brown eyes. The very eyes she had always found so striking before. They hadn’t changed but Falala no longer saw them in the same way. Falala shuffled her paws slightly, thinking of how to answer. “I...I uh, maybe?” Falala stumbled through a very vague answer. “Why? Do you?” Falala asked, realising slowly that it was probably why she had asked. A little spark of excitement ignited in her chest, “If you do I wanna know everything about them, they have to be great, only the best for the lava queen of the savannah.” Falala half teased, unaware of where this line of conversation was going to lead.