HOME | DD

Description
When my father called up earlier that day and told me “he’d love to see me.” I was very reluctant to say yes. After the divorce 5 months prior, I thought I wouldn’t have to deal with him. Leaving a life where someone who was supposed to protect you and nurture you but instead beat you and caused nothing but harm, after all of the abuse I’ve endured over the past 18 years of my life, He was the last person I wanted to see.

"Can I talk to you?" He asked, His voice shakey. As I followed him into his room I asked "What did want to talk about?", knowing very well what was to come. "I'm sorry Rebecca..." He said as I sat down on the bed. "I'm sorry for everything I put you through."

I remembered this speech all to well, I've heard it after the beatings, after calling me a mistake, after he fought with my mom, and now it meant nothing to me. This speech shouldn't have been heard at all, there shouldn't be a need to apologize. I just stared at the wall coldly. I've built a wall that wasn't going to be broken anymore, I refused to believe what he told me anymore, I refused to be hurt again....

"I never meant to hurt you" He trembled, and with that, he started to cry. He threw his arms around me and I held him as his cried. "I love you so much Rebecca, I'm going to be a better father from now on"

'What a great actor," I thought to myself. "If you could only forgive me.." He pulled away from me and looked into my eyes. "I do Dad," I lied. "I forgive you..." He smiled and said thank you, hugging me again. I said what he wanted to hear, anything to get this over with so I can get as far away from him as possible.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

This is part of a series/story I'm creating about the events leading up to my father's death. I hope to create a book about it one day. These events are what made me who I am today, and I couldn't be more thankful for them.

Picture made completely in CS2.

Description
When my father called up earlier that day and told me “he’d love to see me.” I was very reluctant to say yes. After the divorce 5 months prior, I thought I wouldn’t have to deal with him. Leaving a life where someone who was supposed to protect you and nurture you but instead beat you and caused nothing but harm, after all of the abuse I’ve endured over the past 18 years of my life, He was the last person I wanted to see.

"Can I talk to you?" He asked, His voice shakey. As I followed him into his room I asked "What did want to talk about?", knowing very well what was to come. "I'm sorry Rebecca..." He said as I sat down on the bed. "I'm sorry for everything I put you through."

I remembered this speech all to well, I've heard it after the beatings, after calling me a mistake, after he fought with my mom, and now it meant nothing to me. This speech shouldn't have been heard at all, there shouldn't be a need to apologize. I just stared at the wall coldly. I've built a wall that wasn't going to be broken anymore, I refused to believe what he told me anymore, I refused to be hurt again....

"I never meant to hurt you" He trembled, and with that, he started to cry. He threw his arms around me and I held him as his cried. "I love you so much Rebecca, I'm going to be a better father from now on"

'What a great actor," I thought to myself. "If you could only forgive me.." He pulled away from me and looked into my eyes. "I do Dad," I lied. "I forgive you..." He smiled and said thank you, hugging me again. I said what he wanted to hear, anything to get this over with so I can get as far away from him as possible.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

This is part of a series/story I'm creating about the events leading up to my father's death. I hope to create a book about it one day. These events are what made me who I am today, and I couldn't be more thankful for them.

Picture made completely in CS2.