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unknown-shadow β pushed away
Published: 2004-08-27 09:13:39 +0000 UTC; Views: 170; Favourites: 3; Downloads: 6
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-pushed away-why do you avoid me?
constantly ignore me?
and when you see me you only want one thing it seems,
unless its in my dreams
there u talk to me, walk with me
enjoy spending time with me
i wake up and snap back to reality
and sure sometimes you smile and wave to me
but it seems lately thats all youve gave to me
and do you remeber when you first told me you loved me
i bet if i tried to hug you now youd look at me andΒ Β shove
me,
of course you dont remember it seems lately
you fake me
these are all lies you insist
but behind it all to you i dont even exist.
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Comments: 16
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good i can see wot this guys sayin but still its pretty good
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thanks um what did u mean by u can see what this guys saying the one its writen about?
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no i mean the person commenting on it
lol
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yea i get it now yea it was one to my bf when i was mad at him
and i guess well i felt that way
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strong emotion. many of them at that. not bad, not bad at all.
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thanks not as well expressed as urs usually is though
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the expression taht comes out of a poem is only marked by how much feeling you put into teh poem when you wrote it. or emotion realy. we cant all be expected to be able to put everyhting we have into every poem we have.
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no of course not but i know you put alot of thought into most ur work i know i do or atlest try to
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to be completely honest i dont realy put any thought into it, when i write i wright form feel not form thought. thats why a lot of mine dosnt rhyme or only does in certain spots. If you write what you feel over time you dont think. you learn how to put your feelings into words and those words build together into thoughts and thoe thoughts into a story or poem. you automatically think of how to write it and all yes. but over timeif you jsut let yourself go and dont inhibit oyurself with thoughts it flows freely and you learn how speciacally the sound or the feeling of the poem is suposed to come out. jsut takes a bit of time before you finaly get it but when you do it works perfectly. A good trick for that is simple. instead of writing. talk. act like your tlaking to someone thats there. explaining ot them how you feel. but write it down. the first few times edit it afterwards. but overtime youll get where you barely have to touch it up afterwards if even at all.
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yeah thats true i spend too much time trying to get words to ryme and loose the feeling and thoughts that way so that its just meaningless words on paper and i end up hateing it thats happend alot of times i just try to hard for perfection im such a perfectonist and i hate it!!!
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dont worry about being a perfectionest. No one starts out writing without trying to make things work right of the bat. takes anywhere from months to years. Dosnt mean ther bead cause your sitll trying to get the feeling out. your just putting a couple limits on it thats all. like i said its a good poem dont think that your stuff weather it be written now or later is bad cause of it.
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thanks and as usual ur right wow u always seem to have some sorta kind advice lol thanks
mike and yes u hit the nail on the head i am a perfectionist a big onne but most ppl arre even if they dont realize it lol
kate
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lol hey im not saying they arnt. my friend mike is the biggestof them that i know. but on point, im glad what say helps some.
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lol yeah it usually helps me and explains and helps me understands things
kate
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