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Chapter 1- Butting Heads (Pt 1)

I'm getting far too old for this job.

This thought, common as it was to Sarutobi nowadays, was not helping his current situation in the least, and thus was once again pushed to the back of his mind until he had the time to contemplate it later. Hopefully, before he ended up dying of being overworked.

Realizing he was getting off track, the Sandaime Hokage shook his head and turned back to concentrate on the papers in front of him, which listed off the admittedly impressive transcript of the seven year old Ninja Academy graduate Uchiha Itachi, the son of Uchiha Fugaku and Mikoto and one of the most promising youths he'd seen since Namikaze Minato had graduated, thirsty for knowledge and eager to take on the world.

The reports about the boy's behavior concerned the old man, though. Most of the chunin described Itachi as a talented student who excelled at everything he tried academically, but severely lacked social skills. According to the reports, all of the students who tried to make friends with the Uchiha were either coldly turned away or ignored outright. He was even disrespectful to most of his teachers, and even talked down to the ones who feared him or his family name.

At least Minato had always been humble, polite and respectful of his elders...

Sarutobi sighed, replacing the papers in the folder they had come in. Due to the Uchiha's high standing in Konoha as well as the fact that Itachi was one of the most talented Uchihas the clan had ever seen, Sarutobi had relieved the boy's chunin instructors at the Ninja Academy of the burden of choosing his Jonin instructor, instead taking on the challenge himself. Though of course, Fugaku and Mikoto would have a say in their boy's sensei as well. In fact, he was scheduled to meet with them in a few hours to discuss the matter face-to-face. Which meant he only had a few more hours to assign a teacher to a very talented, very complicated young shinobi.

Normally, when dealing with nins as problematic as Itachi was bound to be, he would be selective in choosing the boy's teammates and squad leader. By making sure to choose people who would challenge the boy to grow as a shinobi and at the same making sure the team would help draw him out of his shell, it would teach the boy the value of teamwork and friends. However, that would be difficult in this case since Itachi was an early graduate, which meant that he would train one-on-one with a jonin instructor instead of getting a full three man squad like most students. Sarutobi was tempted to ask the boy's parents for permission to treat the boy's situation as a special case, but he already knew that Fugaku would never agree to something like that, and Mikoto would go along with whatever her husband decided.

Which means I have to be even more selective in choosing Itachi's sensei. Sarutobi thought dryly, tucking Itachi's folder into a drawer before he opened another to pull out a scroll, which he unrolled onto his desk.

The Sandaime cringed when he saw the sheer number of names printed on the scroll, which listed every active jonin in Konoha. Wearily, he wondered how on earth the chunins at the Ninja academy managed to sort through such a mess to pick which ones were the best leaders for which squads, while at the same time weighing the strengths and weaknesses of their students to keep every team balanced.

Then again, such considerations were necessary in spite of being a hassle, since they kept young ninjas alive that much longer. And with the war that now raged around them, Konoha genin needed every advantage they could get.

The children of Konoha seem to grow up far faster in this day and age... The Hokage mused darkly to himself, realizing rather ironically that young Itachi was the perfect example of that rapidly lost childhood. Sighing, Sarutobi chastised himself for letting his mind wander yet again, and went back to skimming the scroll in front of him for potential jonin instructors for the Uchiha.

He'd only managed to jot down a few names off of the list when a knock at the door drew his attention upwards, to see one of his Anbu guards entering the office, a young man bearing a wolf-shaped mask. Sarutobi frowned curiously as the shinobi bowed respectfully, wondering what on earth could warrant his attention now.

"Forgive me for interrupting, Hokage-sama." the Anbu apologized as he straightened. "but Uchiha Fugaku and his wife Uchiha Mikoto are requesting a conference with you immediately."

Ah, so that was it. His frown deepening, Sarutobi glanced at the clock on his wall to find that he still had an hour before he was scheduled to meet with the Uchihas for their discussion. And as much as he respected the man as a shinobi, the Sandaime couldn't help but feel that it was very much like Fugaku to arrive a full hour early for a meeting and demand to be let in straight away.

Really, sometimes he wished the man had his nephew's bad habit of always being late...

"Very well." Sarutobi sighed, deciding to make due with what he had. "Show them in, please."

"As you wish, Hokage-sama." The Anbu said, bowing again before he took his leave. As the doors closed behind him, the Sandaime replaced the scroll in the drawer it had come from, leaving only his list of potential instructors on his desk. Moments later, the Anbu was back, this time admitting two of the most influential shinobis in Konoha into Sarutobi's office.

"Fugaku, Mikoto, thank you for coming." Sarutobi said with a smile for the couple as the Anbu left yet again, closing the door behind him.

"Hokage-sama." Fugaku said, forgoing the typical show of respect and instead merely nodding curtly to the older man as was his custom. Mikoto, on the other hand, gave the Sandaime a deep, respectful bow.

"I hope you can forgive our early arrival, Hokage-sama." the woman's voice rang out apologetically as she straightened up. "Several members of the clan wish to celebrate Itachi's graduation with our family, and I'm afraid we're not fully prepared for them just yet." Sarutobi smiled at the woman, a former student of Jiraiya’s team and a talented kunoichi before she retired not long after marrying Fugaku.

"That's quite alright, Mikoto." Sarutobi chuckled, motioning for the two to sit. "I understand completely. I suppose we should try to make this meeting brief, then..."

"My husband and I would be grateful for that, Hokage-sama." Mikoto said with a soft smile.

"Well, I've managed to make a list of possible teacher's for your son, and no doubt you two have considered possible instructors on your own as well. Hopefully, we'll be able to settle on one soon enough." Sarutobi responded. "Is there anything you'd like me to take into consideration that wasn't in Itachi's files?"

"Actually, there is..." Mikoto said, glancing at her husband.

"We've discussed the situation all week, and decided that we do not want a member of the Uchiha clan to teach my son." Fugaku explained. Sarutobi blinked in surprise, not expecting the odd request.

"Oh?" He said curiously. "Why's that?"

"Itachi's grown up watching the more prominent members of our clan, and has probably already learned all he can from their tutelage." Fugaku explained curtly to the Hokage. "I believe my son is better off learning from someone strong who is not of kin, to introduce new techniques to our family."

"Ah, I see." Sarutobi frowned thoughtfully at the man's words, skimming his list for potential names. "With that in mind, why not ask Hyuuga Hizashi to teach Itachi? The Hyuuga's fighting style differs from your own, after all, I'm sure there's much Itachi can learn from it."

"I do not want my son being taught by a Hyuuga." Fugaku scowled slightly, his eyes narrowing on the man in front of him.

"Hizashi is a talented shinobi, Fugaku, I'm sure he can help teach your son a great deal of things." Sarutobi pressed.

"Absolutely not." Fugaku snapped. "Under no circumstances will my son be taught by a Hyuuga." Sarutobi mentally sighed as he reluctantly dropped the subject and looked for the next name. Secretly, he'd been hoping that by having the next head of the Uchiha clan taught by a member of the Hyuuga clan, the rift that had formed between the two superpowers of Konoha might heal a bit...

Ah, well. Sarutobi told himself. I suppose I'll have to find another way to deal with that problem. I wonder how much counseling would cost...

"What about Yamanaka then? Or his teammates, Akimichi or Nara?"

"The three of them have gained a reputation as a squad, but are hardly known for their individual skills." Fugaku scoffed. "I want my son's teacher to be someone who's reputation expands beyond Konoha."

I suppose that rules out Inuzuka and Aburame as well, then. Sarutobi winced, this was going to be even harder then he originally thought...

"What about the former Sanin?" Fugaku questioned, bringing Sarutobi out of his musings. "I know Tsunade is still outside of the village, but Jiraiya or Orochimaru should be capable of teaching Itachi."

"Jiraiya's been away from the village for weeks now doing research, I'm afraid." Sarutobi sighed as Mikoto ducked her head to hide her silent laugher from the men, knowing her former sensei well enough to know exactly what his 'research' would be. "And Orochimaru just recently requested to teach another student from your son's graduating class. A girl by the name of Mitarashi Anko." Privately, though, Sarutobi couldn't help but feel that his former student would drop the girl in an instant to teach an Uchiha. But Orochimaru's behavior lately had been concerning him, and he felt it best to keep the man away from the Uchiha clan until he figured out exactly what was going on.

"How about Namikaze Minato?" The Uchiha head demanded. "I've heard that he plans to nominate Kakashi for the jonin test, and that the boy will take over his squad when he passes."

"The tests aren't being held for several months, Fugaku, and Minato hasn't made his decision yet." Sarutobi frowned at the man. "Besides, Minato is already teaching your nephew Obito, if you recall. Any lessons you wish for Minato to pass to your clan can most likely be learned through him." Fugaku scowled slightly at that reminder, and the Sandaime couldn't help but feel frustrated over the man's stubbornness. Really, they were getting nowhere fast with the way things were going right now...

"What about Kushina-chan?"

Both Fugaku and Sarutobi started at that, turning in surprise to look at the innocent smile Mikoto was giving them. The two had been so intent on their discussion, they'd almost forgotten she was there...

"Kushina?" Sarutobi repeated when the woman's suggestion finally registered in his mind. "Uzumaki Kushina? You want her to teach your son?" The Sandaime couldn't fully keep his surprise out of his voice. After all, most of the parents he knew would probably cry in anguish if he told them he intended to have their child taught by the foreign redhead, and here Mikoto was requesting her tutelage.

...Then again, Mikoto and Kushina had been close friends before Mikoto had retired as a ninja, and even now he knew the woman still made time to drop in on the redhead every now and then... Maybe the suggestion shouldn't have been such a big surprise after all.

"I don't see what the problem is, Hokage-sama." Mikoto said, never losing her smile. "She fits all the requirements my husband and I want in Itachi's tutor, after all, and I don't believe she's found a student yet, either..."

"Well... No, she hasn't..." Sarutobi glanced at Fugaku to see how he was taking his wife's suggestion, his surprise growing when her saw a thoughtful look on the man's face.

"Uzumaki is one of the most talented kunoichis since Tsunade." The Uchiha head mused. "And being from another village, her technique is very unique to Konoha. I see no problem with this." The Hokage could hardly believe that the couple was so willing to hand their son over to a kunoichi who was widely considered a dangerous madwoman in the eyes of the village.

Coming out of his shock, Sarutobi began to seriously consider the suggestion himself. While it was true that Kushina was... unusual and while she was rather prone to violence whenever her short temper was provoked, she was still a kind woman and, more importantly, a very talented shinobi. And on top of that, Sarutobi knew that the friendly and hyperactive redhead would not allow any genin under her tutelage to have anti-social tendencies, even if he was the only one she had to put up with. Maybe this was a smart choice after all...

"Very well then." He said, smiling wearily at the Uchihas. "I will talk to Kushina about taking Itachi as her student. I can't guarantee anything, since this is Kushina we're talking about, but I'll give it my best shot."

"Thank you, Hokage-sama." Mikoto said, as she as her husband stood, bowing before following Fugaku out of Sarutobi's office.

This is going to be difficult... The Sandaime thought with a sigh, wondering how on earth he'd get the stubborn redhead to even consider his proposal.

"Hokage-sama?"

Looking up, Sarutobi realized that Mikoto was still standing at the door to his office, a knowing smile tugging at her lips.

"I already told Kushina-chan and Minato-kun to be here in about half an hour earlier today, since I had a feeling you'd want to talk to her about something she wouldn't want to hear and Minato-kun has a talent for making Kushina-chan listen even when she doesn't want to. I hope that wasn't too presumptuous of me." Mikoto winked playfully at the now stunned Hokage then laughed silently to herself as she left, closing the doors behind her. The soft 'click' knocked Sarutobi out of his stupor and sent him into a convulsion of laugher as he realized that Mikoto had planned this entire meeting from the beginning, and made sure that her choice was the one picked in the end.

Next time he saw Jiraiya, he'd have to ask the man how he taught all of his students to be so devious when they set their minds to it.

---

"YOU WANT ME TO WHAAAAT?!"

Sarutobi flinched as the kunoichi's shriek resonated in his skull, promising to give him one nasty headache later that evening.

"You volunteered me to baby-sit some snot-nosed genin brat without even asking me first?!" Kushina snarled, completely unsympathetic to the elderly man's pain. "When I get my hands on you... Lemme go, you jerk!" This last part was directed not at the Sandaime, but rather the poor blonde who was restraining his friend from attempting to murder the Hokage, a crime Minato knew was frowned upon in Konoha. Fed up with his interference, Kushina elbowed the man in the gut to force him to relinquish his hold on her. She got her wish as Minato released her to protect his stomach from further abuse.

And to think, he was only trying to keep her from being treated as a criminal. That's gratitude for you...

"I am NOT teaching any kids, old man!" Kushina snapped at Sarutobi, ignoring her friend's pain. "There's no way you can just make me take on a student!"

"I don't see why you find this situation so distasteful, Kushina." Sarutobi sighed. "Most jonin I know would jump at the chance to teach such a talented youth."

"Then give the brat to one of them!" Kushina shouted, gesturing furiously with her arms and forcing Minato to sidestep to avoid being smacked in the face. "You know I've always hated those stuck up shinobi geniuses! Why on earth would I want to teach one if I can't even stand the sight of 'em?!"

"Minato was always hailed as a genius, and you get along well enough with him." Sarutobi reminded the kunoichi, watching in amusement as the two turned a soft hue of red.

"That's different." Kushina insisted haughtily. "Minato doesn't act like a steel pole's been permanently lodged in his ass." Sarutobi restrained himself from laughing as the blonde turned the same shade of red as Kushina's hair at that one.

"What about Kakashi? You two are very close, Kushina, don't pretend you're not."

"Doesn't mean that there aren't times I want to wring his little neck." Kushina huffed. "The only reason I haven't yet is because I don't have to be around the kid 24/7. You put a brat like that under my care and he'll be dead in a week!"

"Mikoto and Fugaku were both very insistent about wanting you to be Itachi's sensei, Kushina." Sarutobi sighed. "You are one of the few people in this village who's talented enough that even Fugaku will acknowledge your strength."

"That's just because I can beat him in a fight." Kushina scoffed. "He has to say I'm strong, or it'll make him look weak! And I'm not gonna teach his kid just because he doesn't wanna lose face!" Wincing, Sarutobi shot Minato a pleading look, hoping the blonde could help him draw Kushina out of her violent temper tantrum to listen to reason. Minato seemed to understand the look, and gave the Sandaime a reassuring smile.

"Kushina-san's right, Hokage-sama." Minato spoke up, surprising both Kushina and Sarutobi.

How on earth does agreeing with her help me convince her to teach Itachi? He wondered with a frown.

"I am?" Kushina said, raising a suspicious eyebrow at the man, who nodded sagely in return.

"Of course." He agreed. "I mean, I've told you time and again that training my squad was one of the most difficult missions I've ever been given, and you just said yourself that you aren't suited for that, even if it's only one student instead of three." Kushina stiffened at that, narrowing her eyes at Minato.

"Are you saying I can't teach one stinking kid?!" She demanded, scowling at her friend.

"I'd never say that, Kushina-san." Minato insisted. "But I have to admit that I'm surprised you'd turn down such a difficult mission. The only reason I could see for you to do such a thing is if you felt you weren't qualified for the job." Sarutobi finally caught on to Minato's scheme at that comment.

"Ah, I see where you're coming from, Minato." Sarutobi hummed, struggling to keep a straight face. "Yes, I suppose this is a rather difficult task. I suppose I am asking a bit much of you, Kushina."

"Hey, I could teach any kid I want to, okay!" Kushina snarled. "I could teach ten kids if I wanted!"

"I don't know about that, Kushina-san." Minato frowned at the woman. "After all, Mikoto-chan's son sounds like he could be even more difficult then all three of my students put together, and if I couldn't teach him..."

"Don't sell me short, you jerk!" Kushina snapped, advancing on Minato to stab at his chest with her finger. "Just you watch, I'll teach that kid to be the best shinobi Kohona's ever seen!"

"Excellent!" Sarutobi broke in, startling Kushina as he shoved Itachi's files into her arms. "Here's all the information you need about Itachi, you'll be meeting him tomorrow afternoon, some time after lunch. Please have a test prepared for him beforehand."

"Wha...?" Kushina blinked at the scrolls in her arms dumbly for a moment before her eyes widened in realization before narrowing furiously on Minato. "Bastard! You tricked me!"

"I prefer to think that I convinced you to try something new." Minato said brightly even as he moved out of the redhead's reach.

"No way!" Kushina scowled. "This isn't fair! You can't actually expect me to-?!"

"Of course we do, Kushina." Sarutobi cut her off, watching in amusement as the kunoichi pondered which of Minato's bones she'd break first. "After all, you've told us on several occasions that you always keep to your promises, and you just swore to turn Itachi into the best shinobi Konoha's ever seen, so unless you want to go back on your word..." Trapped by her own stubborn nature, Kushina's shoulders fell in anguish.

"Fine." She moaned. "I'll do it. But you!" Pointing an accusing finger at Minato, Kushina smiled evilly, making the mighty Yellow Flash back away in fear. "You owe me dinner, Namikaze Minato. For the rest of the week! That's the only way I'll forgive you for using such an underhanded technique to get me to agree to this stupidity!"

"Fair enough." Minato chuckled nervously, trapped between the angry redhead and a wall. "Ichiraku's?"

"As much as I can eat, and you're paying." Kushina growled out, turning on her heel to stalk out of the office. Sarutobi chuckled as he watched her go.

"Thank you for your assistance, Minato." He said, watching as the blonde smiled ruefully in the direction Kushina had disappeared in. "I never would have believed you were capable of using such deception on a friend, Minato."

"It was no problem, Hokage-sama." Minato said respectfully, before giving a guilty flinch and rubbing the back of his head. "And I normally wouldn't deceive a friend, but I felt that Kushina-san will make an excellent instructor, and having a student will do her a lot of good. Besides, I doubt she's as mad as she wants us to believe she is."

"True, but she'll still make your life difficult for a while for this." the Hokage reminded the man with a chuckle. "Ah, but at least you got a date out of the affair, hmm?" Sarutobi smiled knowingly at Minato as the man blushed violently.

"Ah, I doubt that's what Kushina-san meant about me owning her dinner, Hokage-sama!" Minato protested hastily. "She just doesn't think about how things sound to others before she words her comments!"

"Oh?" Sarutobi said, raising an eyebrow.

"Yes, Kushina-san always makes comments like that, but her innocent and honest nature keep her from understanding that other people tend to misinterpret her words. I've always found it charming, really." Minato explained, sounding as close to babbling as Sarutobi had ever hear the man come. It took everything the old man had not to laugh outright.

"Does that mean that you'd prefer it if Kushina asked you outright to court her?" The old man questioned. "Or would you rather be the one to ask her."

Really, kids today are just too much fun. The Sandaime thought as Minato's face came dangerously close to exploding from embarrassment.

"It's not like that, Hokage-sama, really!" Minato protested weakly. "Kushina-san is a dear friend of mine, but nothing more."

"If you say so, Minato." Sarutobi chuckled. "Though if by some chance your feelings for Kushina do develop into something deeper then friendship, then I suggest you tell her straight away. Otherwise another man might get her first..."

"I'll keep that in mind, Hokage-sama." Minato said, hastily bowing before leaving the old man's office with a good portion of his dignity missing. Really, you think people would realize by now that he and Kushina were just friends!

When he thought about it, though, Minato supposed he really should have been used to comments about his relationship with the redhead by now. After all, he'd been hearing them ever since the two had first met as genin, no thanks to the big mouth of a certain perverted Toad Sanin who had spent the week after he'd met Kushina insisting that Minato had found a crazy tomboy girlfriend.

Of course, the blonde probably would've been far angrier with him if Kushina hadn't gotten to the man first, doing such a good job of shutting the pervert up with her fists that even Tsunade was impressed. Jiraiya, on the other hand, had spent the next three days pouting and moaning about how it was 'always the violent ones, wasn't it?' before he was back to his old tricks and teasing his student worse then ever.

A hand smacked Minato out of his memories before he could contemplate them any further, startling him back to reality. Turning, Minato found himself faced with a rather annoyed looking Kushina.

"Oi! What are you thinking, standing around with that dumb look on your face?" She demanded, throwing an arm around his shoulder. "Your fanclub'll drag you away to have their way with you if they ever caught you out in public looking so spacey, you know."

"I doubt I'll ever have to worry about that when you're around, Kushina-san." Minato chuckled as her removed Kushina's arm. "Most of them seem to be afraid of you." And rightfully so. Kushina was almost frighteningly overprotective of her friends, Minato especially, and the blonde had a feeling that she'd take sadistic pleasure in tormenting anyone she felt might hurt anyone she cared about.

Besides, the giggling and general twittering of Minato's female admirers always seemed to drive Kushina insane...

"Whatever." Kushina scoffed before grabbing Minato's hand and dragging him down the street. "Come on. You promised me dinner, remember?" Momentarily, Minato wondered if he should remind Kushina that she had actually been the one who forced him to treat her, before deciding that he valued his life far too much to chance Kushina's reaction to that reminder.

As the Uzu nin continued to haul one of Kohona's most talented shinobi's through the streets of the village, Minato took notice of all the people giving them curious glances as they past and blushed, conspicuously trying to free his hand of Kushina's grasp.

"You're not getting away that easily, you creep!" Kushina said, shooting Minato a withering glare over her shoulder. "You owe me at least dinner for what you're putting me through, and you know it! Besides, I still don't get this whole test thing, anyways..."

"Uzu didn't have a graduation test?" Minato asked, frowning at the redhead curiously.

"Of course we did!" Kushina said, sounding insulted on her former village's behalf. "You don't think we'd send kids out into battle without knowing if they were ready, do you? We just didn't have all the complicated crap that Konoha does."

"Oh?" Minato questioned, his curiosity growing. He paused a moment to nod at Teuchi, Ichiraku's owner, as he and Kushina took their favorite table, receiving a nod in return before the man busied himself with the pair's usual orders.

"In Uzu, potential genins are blindfolded and taken into separate sections deep in the heart a complicated system of caves near the village that are usually off-limits due to how dangerous they are." Kushina explained to the man across from her. "They're given a time limit of three hours to get out of the cave alive using every ninja skill at their disposal, as the chunins in charge of the school use their skills to confuse the students and give them obstacles to overcome. If you make it out in time, then you pass, if not it's back to the academy."

"And after that?" Minato asked.

"After that, graduates were broken off into teams and sent on their way with their instructors." Kushina shrugged. "I've never heard of any village doing this second test thing before..."

"The second test is merely a chance for the jonin instructor of a squad to measure his students' abilities and drive home important point of being a true shinobi." Minato explained with a chuckle. "It's also a way to help focus on students more independently. If the jonin decides after administering the test that a student is not qualified to be a ninja, the student in question will be sent back to the academy for more training." Kushina frowned at that.

"Sounds complicated." She complained. "Aren't Konoha nins straightforward about anything?"

"Not all shinobi can afford to be like you, Kushina-san." blinking in union, Kushina and Minato turned to find a twelve year old boy standing a few feet away, arms crossed and eyes indifferent.

"Kakashi." Minato said warmly, waving to Teuchi to bring another bowl, and receiving another nod in return. "It's nice to see you up and about... how's your arm?"

"Fine." Kakashi said as he took a seat at their table. "Rin healed it up enough that a good night's sleep fixed the rest of the damage."

"Girl's got talent." Kushina said with a little half smile before glaring at Kakashi. "And hasn't anyone told you that it's rude to eavesdrop, brat?"

"Information gathering is one of the most valuable skills a shinobi can possess." Kakashi reminded the woman, smirking under his mask as her scowl deepened. "Why are you two talking about graduation tests, anyways?"

"Kushina-san's been given a student." Minato explained in a bemused tone even as the redhead in question shot him a warning glare.

"You've been put in charge of a genin?" Kakashi said, raising an eyebrow at Kushina. "The person in charge of assigning teams must have lost his mind."

"Real cute, brat." Kushina growled, smacking Kakashi upside the head with one of Itachi's files. "Haven't you taught this kid to respect his elders, Minato?!"

"I have, but lessons don't tend to stick as well as they should with Kakashi." Minato chuckled, prompting his student to give him a rather nasty look in return.

"Well, I doubt anything I teach this kid'll go over any better." Kushina grumbled as she flipped through Itachi's papers. "Look at these stats! This kid's almost as perfect as you two!"

...Idly, Kakashi thought that only Kushina could ever make that sound like an insult.

"I'm sure you'll do fine, Kushina-san." Minato reassured the redhead. "After all, your wonderful with kids."

"Flattery ain't gonna get you out of having to pay me back, Minato." Kushina told him, never looking up from Itachi's papers even as their food was set in front of them. How on earth old was the kid when he entered the academy if he graduated at seven, anyways...? "You're paying for all of my meals for the rest of the month!"

Minato responded by promptly spitting out the bite of miso ramen he'd just taken.

"ALL your meals for a MONTH?!" He repeated, mortified. "I thought I was just supposed to give you dinner for a week!"

"That was before I took a look at this kid's files." Kushina said, shooting the man a pointed look. "You got me into this, you jerk, so you owe me at least that much for the headache this kid's gonna give me." And with that, Kushina began to pile the pages off to the side so she could eat, leaving Minato to mourn the affect this would have on his bank account as his silver-haired student laughed silently beside him.

"Do you have any plans yet for the boy's test, Kushina-san?" Kakashi asked after he got his laugher under control. Kushina frowned thoughtfully at the question.

"Dunno." She said as she slurped up some of her beef ramen. "I guess I'll figure it out after I meet the kid."

"The bell test is probably out of the question, since you only have one student..." Minato nodded as he pondered with the redhead. Kushina's eyebrow kicked up a notch at that.

"...Bell test?"

"The test sensei gave our squad." Kakashi explained, sounding faintly annoyed. "It's supposed to teach us teamwork."

"Which is difficult to do without a team." Minato finished wryly.

"Point." Kushina chuckled as she finished up her ramen, "Don't worry. I'll think of something. In the meantime, though, It's time to cash in on my free meal ticket! Teuchi-san! Another bowl of beef ramen over here!" Minato flinched as Kushina hailed the cook, forcing his student to smother his laugher yet again.

"You realize that Kushina-san's going to have you bankrupt before the month is out, right Minato-sensei?" Kakashi asked in a sadistically amused tone, causing Minato to grumble bitterly to himself.

Evil little brat...

Description
Chapter 1- Butting Heads (Pt 1)

I'm getting far too old for this job.

This thought, common as it was to Sarutobi nowadays, was not helping his current situation in the least, and thus was once again pushed to the back of his mind until he had the time to contemplate it later. Hopefully, before he ended up dying of being overworked.

Realizing he was getting off track, the Sandaime Hokage shook his head and turned back to concentrate on the papers in front of him, which listed off the admittedly impressive transcript of the seven year old Ninja Academy graduate Uchiha Itachi, the son of Uchiha Fugaku and Mikoto and one of the most promising youths he'd seen since Namikaze Minato had graduated, thirsty for knowledge and eager to take on the world.

The reports about the boy's behavior concerned the old man, though. Most of the chunin described Itachi as a talented student who excelled at everything he tried academically, but severely lacked social skills. According to the reports, all of the students who tried to make friends with the Uchiha were either coldly turned away or ignored outright. He was even disrespectful to most of his teachers, and even talked down to the ones who feared him or his family name.

At least Minato had always been humble, polite and respectful of his elders...

Sarutobi sighed, replacing the papers in the folder they had come in. Due to the Uchiha's high standing in Konoha as well as the fact that Itachi was one of the most talented Uchihas the clan had ever seen, Sarutobi had relieved the boy's chunin instructors at the Ninja Academy of the burden of choosing his Jonin instructor, instead taking on the challenge himself. Though of course, Fugaku and Mikoto would have a say in their boy's sensei as well. In fact, he was scheduled to meet with them in a few hours to discuss the matter face-to-face. Which meant he only had a few more hours to assign a teacher to a very talented, very complicated young shinobi.

Normally, when dealing with nins as problematic as Itachi was bound to be, he would be selective in choosing the boy's teammates and squad leader. By making sure to choose people who would challenge the boy to grow as a shinobi and at the same making sure the team would help draw him out of his shell, it would teach the boy the value of teamwork and friends. However, that would be difficult in this case since Itachi was an early graduate, which meant that he would train one-on-one with a jonin instructor instead of getting a full three man squad like most students. Sarutobi was tempted to ask the boy's parents for permission to treat the boy's situation as a special case, but he already knew that Fugaku would never agree to something like that, and Mikoto would go along with whatever her husband decided.

Which means I have to be even more selective in choosing Itachi's sensei. Sarutobi thought dryly, tucking Itachi's folder into a drawer before he opened another to pull out a scroll, which he unrolled onto his desk.

The Sandaime cringed when he saw the sheer number of names printed on the scroll, which listed every active jonin in Konoha. Wearily, he wondered how on earth the chunins at the Ninja academy managed to sort through such a mess to pick which ones were the best leaders for which squads, while at the same time weighing the strengths and weaknesses of their students to keep every team balanced.

Then again, such considerations were necessary in spite of being a hassle, since they kept young ninjas alive that much longer. And with the war that now raged around them, Konoha genin needed every advantage they could get.

The children of Konoha seem to grow up far faster in this day and age... The Hokage mused darkly to himself, realizing rather ironically that young Itachi was the perfect example of that rapidly lost childhood. Sighing, Sarutobi chastised himself for letting his mind wander yet again, and went back to skimming the scroll in front of him for potential jonin instructors for the Uchiha.

He'd only managed to jot down a few names off of the list when a knock at the door drew his attention upwards, to see one of his Anbu guards entering the office, a young man bearing a wolf-shaped mask. Sarutobi frowned curiously as the shinobi bowed respectfully, wondering what on earth could warrant his attention now.

"Forgive me for interrupting, Hokage-sama." the Anbu apologized as he straightened. "but Uchiha Fugaku and his wife Uchiha Mikoto are requesting a conference with you immediately."

Ah, so that was it. His frown deepening, Sarutobi glanced at the clock on his wall to find that he still had an hour before he was scheduled to meet with the Uchihas for their discussion. And as much as he respected the man as a shinobi, the Sandaime couldn't help but feel that it was very much like Fugaku to arrive a full hour early for a meeting and demand to be let in straight away.

Really, sometimes he wished the man had his nephew's bad habit of always being late...

"Very well." Sarutobi sighed, deciding to make due with what he had. "Show them in, please."

"As you wish, Hokage-sama." The Anbu said, bowing again before he took his leave. As the doors closed behind him, the Sandaime replaced the scroll in the drawer it had come from, leaving only his list of potential instructors on his desk. Moments later, the Anbu was back, this time admitting two of the most influential shinobis in Konoha into Sarutobi's office.

"Fugaku, Mikoto, thank you for coming." Sarutobi said with a smile for the couple as the Anbu left yet again, closing the door behind him.

"Hokage-sama." Fugaku said, forgoing the typical show of respect and instead merely nodding curtly to the older man as was his custom. Mikoto, on the other hand, gave the Sandaime a deep, respectful bow.

"I hope you can forgive our early arrival, Hokage-sama." the woman's voice rang out apologetically as she straightened up. "Several members of the clan wish to celebrate Itachi's graduation with our family, and I'm afraid we're not fully prepared for them just yet." Sarutobi smiled at the woman, a former student of Jiraiya’s team and a talented kunoichi before she retired not long after marrying Fugaku.

"That's quite alright, Mikoto." Sarutobi chuckled, motioning for the two to sit. "I understand completely. I suppose we should try to make this meeting brief, then..."

"My husband and I would be grateful for that, Hokage-sama." Mikoto said with a soft smile.

"Well, I've managed to make a list of possible teacher's for your son, and no doubt you two have considered possible instructors on your own as well. Hopefully, we'll be able to settle on one soon enough." Sarutobi responded. "Is there anything you'd like me to take into consideration that wasn't in Itachi's files?"

"Actually, there is..." Mikoto said, glancing at her husband.

"We've discussed the situation all week, and decided that we do not want a member of the Uchiha clan to teach my son." Fugaku explained. Sarutobi blinked in surprise, not expecting the odd request.

"Oh?" He said curiously. "Why's that?"

"Itachi's grown up watching the more prominent members of our clan, and has probably already learned all he can from their tutelage." Fugaku explained curtly to the Hokage. "I believe my son is better off learning from someone strong who is not of kin, to introduce new techniques to our family."

"Ah, I see." Sarutobi frowned thoughtfully at the man's words, skimming his list for potential names. "With that in mind, why not ask Hyuuga Hizashi to teach Itachi? The Hyuuga's fighting style differs from your own, after all, I'm sure there's much Itachi can learn from it."

"I do not want my son being taught by a Hyuuga." Fugaku scowled slightly, his eyes narrowing on the man in front of him.

"Hizashi is a talented shinobi, Fugaku, I'm sure he can help teach your son a great deal of things." Sarutobi pressed.

"Absolutely not." Fugaku snapped. "Under no circumstances will my son be taught by a Hyuuga." Sarutobi mentally sighed as he reluctantly dropped the subject and looked for the next name. Secretly, he'd been hoping that by having the next head of the Uchiha clan taught by a member of the Hyuuga clan, the rift that had formed between the two superpowers of Konoha might heal a bit...

Ah, well. Sarutobi told himself. I suppose I'll have to find another way to deal with that problem. I wonder how much counseling would cost...

"What about Yamanaka then? Or his teammates, Akimichi or Nara?"

"The three of them have gained a reputation as a squad, but are hardly known for their individual skills." Fugaku scoffed. "I want my son's teacher to be someone who's reputation expands beyond Konoha."

I suppose that rules out Inuzuka and Aburame as well, then. Sarutobi winced, this was going to be even harder then he originally thought...

"What about the former Sanin?" Fugaku questioned, bringing Sarutobi out of his musings. "I know Tsunade is still outside of the village, but Jiraiya or Orochimaru should be capable of teaching Itachi."

"Jiraiya's been away from the village for weeks now doing research, I'm afraid." Sarutobi sighed as Mikoto ducked her head to hide her silent laugher from the men, knowing her former sensei well enough to know exactly what his 'research' would be. "And Orochimaru just recently requested to teach another student from your son's graduating class. A girl by the name of Mitarashi Anko." Privately, though, Sarutobi couldn't help but feel that his former student would drop the girl in an instant to teach an Uchiha. But Orochimaru's behavior lately had been concerning him, and he felt it best to keep the man away from the Uchiha clan until he figured out exactly what was going on.

"How about Namikaze Minato?" The Uchiha head demanded. "I've heard that he plans to nominate Kakashi for the jonin test, and that the boy will take over his squad when he passes."

"The tests aren't being held for several months, Fugaku, and Minato hasn't made his decision yet." Sarutobi frowned at the man. "Besides, Minato is already teaching your nephew Obito, if you recall. Any lessons you wish for Minato to pass to your clan can most likely be learned through him." Fugaku scowled slightly at that reminder, and the Sandaime couldn't help but feel frustrated over the man's stubbornness. Really, they were getting nowhere fast with the way things were going right now...

"What about Kushina-chan?"

Both Fugaku and Sarutobi started at that, turning in surprise to look at the innocent smile Mikoto was giving them. The two had been so intent on their discussion, they'd almost forgotten she was there...

"Kushina?" Sarutobi repeated when the woman's suggestion finally registered in his mind. "Uzumaki Kushina? You want her to teach your son?" The Sandaime couldn't fully keep his surprise out of his voice. After all, most of the parents he knew would probably cry in anguish if he told them he intended to have their child taught by the foreign redhead, and here Mikoto was requesting her tutelage.

...Then again, Mikoto and Kushina had been close friends before Mikoto had retired as a ninja, and even now he knew the woman still made time to drop in on the redhead every now and then... Maybe the suggestion shouldn't have been such a big surprise after all.

"I don't see what the problem is, Hokage-sama." Mikoto said, never losing her smile. "She fits all the requirements my husband and I want in Itachi's tutor, after all, and I don't believe she's found a student yet, either..."

"Well... No, she hasn't..." Sarutobi glanced at Fugaku to see how he was taking his wife's suggestion, his surprise growing when her saw a thoughtful look on the man's face.

"Uzumaki is one of the most talented kunoichis since Tsunade." The Uchiha head mused. "And being from another village, her technique is very unique to Konoha. I see no problem with this." The Hokage could hardly believe that the couple was so willing to hand their son over to a kunoichi who was widely considered a dangerous madwoman in the eyes of the village.

Coming out of his shock, Sarutobi began to seriously consider the suggestion himself. While it was true that Kushina was... unusual and while she was rather prone to violence whenever her short temper was provoked, she was still a kind woman and, more importantly, a very talented shinobi. And on top of that, Sarutobi knew that the friendly and hyperactive redhead would not allow any genin under her tutelage to have anti-social tendencies, even if he was the only one she had to put up with. Maybe this was a smart choice after all...

"Very well then." He said, smiling wearily at the Uchihas. "I will talk to Kushina about taking Itachi as her student. I can't guarantee anything, since this is Kushina we're talking about, but I'll give it my best shot."

"Thank you, Hokage-sama." Mikoto said, as she as her husband stood, bowing before following Fugaku out of Sarutobi's office.

This is going to be difficult... The Sandaime thought with a sigh, wondering how on earth he'd get the stubborn redhead to even consider his proposal.

"Hokage-sama?"

Looking up, Sarutobi realized that Mikoto was still standing at the door to his office, a knowing smile tugging at her lips.

"I already told Kushina-chan and Minato-kun to be here in about half an hour earlier today, since I had a feeling you'd want to talk to her about something she wouldn't want to hear and Minato-kun has a talent for making Kushina-chan listen even when she doesn't want to. I hope that wasn't too presumptuous of me." Mikoto winked playfully at the now stunned Hokage then laughed silently to herself as she left, closing the doors behind her. The soft 'click' knocked Sarutobi out of his stupor and sent him into a convulsion of laugher as he realized that Mikoto had planned this entire meeting from the beginning, and made sure that her choice was the one picked in the end.

Next time he saw Jiraiya, he'd have to ask the man how he taught all of his students to be so devious when they set their minds to it.

---

"YOU WANT ME TO WHAAAAT?!"

Sarutobi flinched as the kunoichi's shriek resonated in his skull, promising to give him one nasty headache later that evening.

"You volunteered me to baby-sit some snot-nosed genin brat without even asking me first?!" Kushina snarled, completely unsympathetic to the elderly man's pain. "When I get my hands on you... Lemme go, you jerk!" This last part was directed not at the Sandaime, but rather the poor blonde who was restraining his friend from attempting to murder the Hokage, a crime Minato knew was frowned upon in Konoha. Fed up with his interference, Kushina elbowed the man in the gut to force him to relinquish his hold on her. She got her wish as Minato released her to protect his stomach from further abuse.

And to think, he was only trying to keep her from being treated as a criminal. That's gratitude for you...

"I am NOT teaching any kids, old man!" Kushina snapped at Sarutobi, ignoring her friend's pain. "There's no way you can just make me take on a student!"

"I don't see why you find this situation so distasteful, Kushina." Sarutobi sighed. "Most jonin I know would jump at the chance to teach such a talented youth."

"Then give the brat to one of them!" Kushina shouted, gesturing furiously with her arms and forcing Minato to sidestep to avoid being smacked in the face. "You know I've always hated those stuck up shinobi geniuses! Why on earth would I want to teach one if I can't even stand the sight of 'em?!"

"Minato was always hailed as a genius, and you get along well enough with him." Sarutobi reminded the kunoichi, watching in amusement as the two turned a soft hue of red.

"That's different." Kushina insisted haughtily. "Minato doesn't act like a steel pole's been permanently lodged in his ass." Sarutobi restrained himself from laughing as the blonde turned the same shade of red as Kushina's hair at that one.

"What about Kakashi? You two are very close, Kushina, don't pretend you're not."

"Doesn't mean that there aren't times I want to wring his little neck." Kushina huffed. "The only reason I haven't yet is because I don't have to be around the kid 24/7. You put a brat like that under my care and he'll be dead in a week!"

"Mikoto and Fugaku were both very insistent about wanting you to be Itachi's sensei, Kushina." Sarutobi sighed. "You are one of the few people in this village who's talented enough that even Fugaku will acknowledge your strength."

"That's just because I can beat him in a fight." Kushina scoffed. "He has to say I'm strong, or it'll make him look weak! And I'm not gonna teach his kid just because he doesn't wanna lose face!" Wincing, Sarutobi shot Minato a pleading look, hoping the blonde could help him draw Kushina out of her violent temper tantrum to listen to reason. Minato seemed to understand the look, and gave the Sandaime a reassuring smile.

"Kushina-san's right, Hokage-sama." Minato spoke up, surprising both Kushina and Sarutobi.

How on earth does agreeing with her help me convince her to teach Itachi? He wondered with a frown.

"I am?" Kushina said, raising a suspicious eyebrow at the man, who nodded sagely in return.

"Of course." He agreed. "I mean, I've told you time and again that training my squad was one of the most difficult missions I've ever been given, and you just said yourself that you aren't suited for that, even if it's only one student instead of three." Kushina stiffened at that, narrowing her eyes at Minato.

"Are you saying I can't teach one stinking kid?!" She demanded, scowling at her friend.

"I'd never say that, Kushina-san." Minato insisted. "But I have to admit that I'm surprised you'd turn down such a difficult mission. The only reason I could see for you to do such a thing is if you felt you weren't qualified for the job." Sarutobi finally caught on to Minato's scheme at that comment.

"Ah, I see where you're coming from, Minato." Sarutobi hummed, struggling to keep a straight face. "Yes, I suppose this is a rather difficult task. I suppose I am asking a bit much of you, Kushina."

"Hey, I could teach any kid I want to, okay!" Kushina snarled. "I could teach ten kids if I wanted!"

"I don't know about that, Kushina-san." Minato frowned at the woman. "After all, Mikoto-chan's son sounds like he could be even more difficult then all three of my students put together, and if I couldn't teach him..."

"Don't sell me short, you jerk!" Kushina snapped, advancing on Minato to stab at his chest with her finger. "Just you watch, I'll teach that kid to be the best shinobi Kohona's ever seen!"

"Excellent!" Sarutobi broke in, startling Kushina as he shoved Itachi's files into her arms. "Here's all the information you need about Itachi, you'll be meeting him tomorrow afternoon, some time after lunch. Please have a test prepared for him beforehand."

"Wha...?" Kushina blinked at the scrolls in her arms dumbly for a moment before her eyes widened in realization before narrowing furiously on Minato. "Bastard! You tricked me!"

"I prefer to think that I convinced you to try something new." Minato said brightly even as he moved out of the redhead's reach.

"No way!" Kushina scowled. "This isn't fair! You can't actually expect me to-?!"

"Of course we do, Kushina." Sarutobi cut her off, watching in amusement as the kunoichi pondered which of Minato's bones she'd break first. "After all, you've told us on several occasions that you always keep to your promises, and you just swore to turn Itachi into the best shinobi Konoha's ever seen, so unless you want to go back on your word..." Trapped by her own stubborn nature, Kushina's shoulders fell in anguish.

"Fine." She moaned. "I'll do it. But you!" Pointing an accusing finger at Minato, Kushina smiled evilly, making the mighty Yellow Flash back away in fear. "You owe me dinner, Namikaze Minato. For the rest of the week! That's the only way I'll forgive you for using such an underhanded technique to get me to agree to this stupidity!"

"Fair enough." Minato chuckled nervously, trapped between the angry redhead and a wall. "Ichiraku's?"

"As much as I can eat, and you're paying." Kushina growled out, turning on her heel to stalk out of the office. Sarutobi chuckled as he watched her go.

"Thank you for your assistance, Minato." He said, watching as the blonde smiled ruefully in the direction Kushina had disappeared in. "I never would have believed you were capable of using such deception on a friend, Minato."

"It was no problem, Hokage-sama." Minato said respectfully, before giving a guilty flinch and rubbing the back of his head. "And I normally wouldn't deceive a friend, but I felt that Kushina-san will make an excellent instructor, and having a student will do her a lot of good. Besides, I doubt she's as mad as she wants us to believe she is."

"True, but she'll still make your life difficult for a while for this." the Hokage reminded the man with a chuckle. "Ah, but at least you got a date out of the affair, hmm?" Sarutobi smiled knowingly at Minato as the man blushed violently.

"Ah, I doubt that's what Kushina-san meant about me owning her dinner, Hokage-sama!" Minato protested hastily. "She just doesn't think about how things sound to others before she words her comments!"

"Oh?" Sarutobi said, raising an eyebrow.

"Yes, Kushina-san always makes comments like that, but her innocent and honest nature keep her from understanding that other people tend to misinterpret her words. I've always found it charming, really." Minato explained, sounding as close to babbling as Sarutobi had ever hear the man come. It took everything the old man had not to laugh outright.

"Does that mean that you'd prefer it if Kushina asked you outright to court her?" The old man questioned. "Or would you rather be the one to ask her."

Really, kids today are just too much fun. The Sandaime thought as Minato's face came dangerously close to exploding from embarrassment.

"It's not like that, Hokage-sama, really!" Minato protested weakly. "Kushina-san is a dear friend of mine, but nothing more."

"If you say so, Minato." Sarutobi chuckled. "Though if by some chance your feelings for Kushina do develop into something deeper then friendship, then I suggest you tell her straight away. Otherwise another man might get her first..."

"I'll keep that in mind, Hokage-sama." Minato said, hastily bowing before leaving the old man's office with a good portion of his dignity missing. Really, you think people would realize by now that he and Kushina were just friends!

When he thought about it, though, Minato supposed he really should have been used to comments about his relationship with the redhead by now. After all, he'd been hearing them ever since the two had first met as genin, no thanks to the big mouth of a certain perverted Toad Sanin who had spent the week after he'd met Kushina insisting that Minato had found a crazy tomboy girlfriend.

Of course, the blonde probably would've been far angrier with him if Kushina hadn't gotten to the man first, doing such a good job of shutting the pervert up with her fists that even Tsunade was impressed. Jiraiya, on the other hand, had spent the next three days pouting and moaning about how it was 'always the violent ones, wasn't it?' before he was back to his old tricks and teasing his student worse then ever.

A hand smacked Minato out of his memories before he could contemplate them any further, startling him back to reality. Turning, Minato found himself faced with a rather annoyed looking Kushina.

"Oi! What are you thinking, standing around with that dumb look on your face?" She demanded, throwing an arm around his shoulder. "Your fanclub'll drag you away to have their way with you if they ever caught you out in public looking so spacey, you know."

"I doubt I'll ever have to worry about that when you're around, Kushina-san." Minato chuckled as her removed Kushina's arm. "Most of them seem to be afraid of you." And rightfully so. Kushina was almost frighteningly overprotective of her friends, Minato especially, and the blonde had a feeling that she'd take sadistic pleasure in tormenting anyone she felt might hurt anyone she cared about.

Besides, the giggling and general twittering of Minato's female admirers always seemed to drive Kushina insane...

"Whatever." Kushina scoffed before grabbing Minato's hand and dragging him down the street. "Come on. You promised me dinner, remember?" Momentarily, Minato wondered if he should remind Kushina that she had actually been the one who forced him to treat her, before deciding that he valued his life far too much to chance Kushina's reaction to that reminder.

As the Uzu nin continued to haul one of Kohona's most talented shinobi's through the streets of the village, Minato took notice of all the people giving them curious glances as they past and blushed, conspicuously trying to free his hand of Kushina's grasp.

"You're not getting away that easily, you creep!" Kushina said, shooting Minato a withering glare over her shoulder. "You owe me at least dinner for what you're putting me through, and you know it! Besides, I still don't get this whole test thing, anyways..."

"Uzu didn't have a graduation test?" Minato asked, frowning at the redhead curiously.

"Of course we did!" Kushina said, sounding insulted on her former village's behalf. "You don't think we'd send kids out into battle without knowing if they were ready, do you? We just didn't have all the complicated crap that Konoha does."

"Oh?" Minato questioned, his curiosity growing. He paused a moment to nod at Teuchi, Ichiraku's owner, as he and Kushina took their favorite table, receiving a nod in return before the man busied himself with the pair's usual orders.

"In Uzu, potential genins are blindfolded and taken into separate sections deep in the heart a complicated system of caves near the village that are usually off-limits due to how dangerous they are." Kushina explained to the man across from her. "They're given a time limit of three hours to get out of the cave alive using every ninja skill at their disposal, as the chunins in charge of the school use their skills to confuse the students and give them obstacles to overcome. If you make it out in time, then you pass, if not it's back to the academy."

"And after that?" Minato asked.

"After that, graduates were broken off into teams and sent on their way with their instructors." Kushina shrugged. "I've never heard of any village doing this second test thing before..."

"The second test is merely a chance for the jonin instructor of a squad to measure his students' abilities and drive home important point of being a true shinobi." Minato explained with a chuckle. "It's also a way to help focus on students more independently. If the jonin decides after administering the test that a student is not qualified to be a ninja, the student in question will be sent back to the academy for more training." Kushina frowned at that.

"Sounds complicated." She complained. "Aren't Konoha nins straightforward about anything?"

"Not all shinobi can afford to be like you, Kushina-san." blinking in union, Kushina and Minato turned to find a twelve year old boy standing a few feet away, arms crossed and eyes indifferent.

"Kakashi." Minato said warmly, waving to Teuchi to bring another bowl, and receiving another nod in return. "It's nice to see you up and about... how's your arm?"

"Fine." Kakashi said as he took a seat at their table. "Rin healed it up enough that a good night's sleep fixed the rest of the damage."

"Girl's got talent." Kushina said with a little half smile before glaring at Kakashi. "And hasn't anyone told you that it's rude to eavesdrop, brat?"

"Information gathering is one of the most valuable skills a shinobi can possess." Kakashi reminded the woman, smirking under his mask as her scowl deepened. "Why are you two talking about graduation tests, anyways?"

"Kushina-san's been given a student." Minato explained in a bemused tone even as the redhead in question shot him a warning glare.

"You've been put in charge of a genin?" Kakashi said, raising an eyebrow at Kushina. "The person in charge of assigning teams must have lost his mind."

"Real cute, brat." Kushina growled, smacking Kakashi upside the head with one of Itachi's files. "Haven't you taught this kid to respect his elders, Minato?!"

"I have, but lessons don't tend to stick as well as they should with Kakashi." Minato chuckled, prompting his student to give him a rather nasty look in return.

"Well, I doubt anything I teach this kid'll go over any better." Kushina grumbled as she flipped through Itachi's papers. "Look at these stats! This kid's almost as perfect as you two!"

...Idly, Kakashi thought that only Kushina could ever make that sound like an insult.

"I'm sure you'll do fine, Kushina-san." Minato reassured the redhead. "After all, your wonderful with kids."

"Flattery ain't gonna get you out of having to pay me back, Minato." Kushina told him, never looking up from Itachi's papers even as their food was set in front of them. How on earth old was the kid when he entered the academy if he graduated at seven, anyways...? "You're paying for all of my meals for the rest of the month!"

Minato responded by promptly spitting out the bite of miso ramen he'd just taken.

"ALL your meals for a MONTH?!" He repeated, mortified. "I thought I was just supposed to give you dinner for a week!"

"That was before I took a look at this kid's files." Kushina said, shooting the man a pointed look. "You got me into this, you jerk, so you owe me at least that much for the headache this kid's gonna give me." And with that, Kushina began to pile the pages off to the side so she could eat, leaving Minato to mourn the affect this would have on his bank account as his silver-haired student laughed silently beside him.

"Do you have any plans yet for the boy's test, Kushina-san?" Kakashi asked after he got his laugher under control. Kushina frowned thoughtfully at the question.

"Dunno." She said as she slurped up some of her beef ramen. "I guess I'll figure it out after I meet the kid."

"The bell test is probably out of the question, since you only have one student..." Minato nodded as he pondered with the redhead. Kushina's eyebrow kicked up a notch at that.

"...Bell test?"

"The test sensei gave our squad." Kakashi explained, sounding faintly annoyed. "It's supposed to teach us teamwork."

"Which is difficult to do without a team." Minato finished wryly.

"Point." Kushina chuckled as she finished up her ramen, "Don't worry. I'll think of something. In the meantime, though, It's time to cash in on my free meal ticket! Teuchi-san! Another bowl of beef ramen over here!" Minato flinched as Kushina hailed the cook, forcing his student to smother his laugher yet again.

"You realize that Kushina-san's going to have you bankrupt before the month is out, right Minato-sensei?" Kakashi asked in a sadistically amused tone, causing Minato to grumble bitterly to himself.

Evil little brat...